Feeling rough

[Pat1956100]

Ugh why do I keep doing this to myself.  It just hit me like a brick.  Thought I was getting off easy but nope.
I'm hanging on tight.

[bama88]

How are you today?? Did ya get any sleep??

[Pat1956100]

Yes, I loved it when my sister asked me if I was clean and I could say YES.

[clean_in_ks]

and there will be SO many more "FIRSTS".:):)

[Pat1956100]

Thanks so much for the birthday wishes.  I was happy to receive lots of phone calls from my family.  First birthday I have been clean and they knew it.
Everyone said I sounded so much better.

I was wondering where you were and so glad you are back.   You were miised.

[Pat1956100]

I actually have some of that.  I will try it.  thanks

[clean_in_ks]

Been thinkin about you ALL day, Miss Pattie!!  5 people I love have b-days today (the 17th) and YOU are included in that count!  So, better late than never, here goes,  uhum....clearing throat

"Happy Birthday to YOU...We love you we DO.....happy birthday miss pattie.........ohhhhhh..happy birthday to you.......and many more!!!

I probably have missed out on a lot; did a PC scan Fri night and had to re-sign on all my passwords.  My medhelp one didn't work..  I am still so absolutely brain dead, I didn't check my "junk mail" for the reset password!  (just my inbox)  Didn't even occur to me Duhhhhh!!!  I was going into w/drawals from not talking to you guys and I KNEW it was your b-day today!  I was getting desperate......I stopped, prayed, asked to be shown......and BINGO.....I saw junk mail unopened!!  Yeahh......I won't make that stupid mistake again.  I swear, this "helpless" feeling is so weird sometimes......and I simply need to remember what the PAWS part 1 article said and be grateful for the healing thus far!!

I know you're gonna do this, Pat.......and if Buddycrunch was around, he'd have some support and lovin for "Pattie", too!

Keep on keepin on.....and if you get to the end of your rope like I did so many times this past week.......hang on and ASK.....your higher power WILL hear you.
Love & Hugs,

[dominosarah]

Warm coke helps an upset tummy...

[Pat1956100]

Ugh, that didn't help my upset tummy lol.

[LeaAnn807]

Pat, Sarah saw a PICTURE of a snake that I had in my kitchen, and she almost died from across the country!  Yeah.......she and I are scared of snakes.  Just not people! LOL Oh, she was scared of one that was dead in my road too! : )

[conhall]

Pat I am sending you a Big Hug and Lots of support you are going to get through this Just one step at a time :) I am pulling for you my friend take deep breaths and just keep looking at that light at end of tunnel its so beautiful .

[Pat1956100]

lol, I believe you.  I am terrified of snakes too and mice well I have 3 cats now and I have just hoping that they don't find one this winter and bring it to me as a present.  Been there done that.  Not pretty.

[dominosarah]

One of my many downfalls is i am not scared of humans(snakes and mice are another thing) so i would have no problem guarding the bunker.  I dont need weapons, i just go for the juggler!!  lol

[LeaAnn807]

Yeah, I had some family members who were ready to shoot someone......ME!  I never bought pills from a dealer, but there are a few docs my dad had a word with, eventhough the harshest were for me.  I was the one responsible for what I was doing.  The thing with dealers, most of the time if you don't have money in your hand, they won't leave drugs.  So don't offer them money, and I'm sure they'll happily sell them to someone else who wants to keep living like that.  

You're going to do fine.  Just keep the door locked! : )

[Pat1956100]

Yes Sara is batty and would bring her bat.  Can you imagine?? lol
Like in the Johnny Cash movie when the drug dealer arrived and they had shotguns out at him.  I would love that.
I do feel safe right now.  I hear noises but it's just my cats, I HOPE.
lol

[LeaAnn807]

Oh, yeah, Pat.  If someone comes to that door, slap them away!  Better yet, don't go near them.  I can't even imagine that kind of temptation when I was going through that.  I think I would have needed an armed guard at my door! LOL Sarah would work! :-)

Remember to take in a lot of fluids and lots of hot baths to stop the aches and warm you up!  I drank about a gallon of hot tea during WDs, and I usually don't drink any! It warmed me up when I had chills.

Good luck and keep coming on here.  That helped me more than ANYTHING!

I'll be cheering for you! : )

[Pat1956100]

Thanks bama
I always listen to Sara.  She doens't sugarcoat anything and you sure can't fool her.
I have me doors locked up tight and just feel safe right now.  Safe from anyone coming to my door and asking me if I want pills.
I dont' and don't even want to think about it.
I am doing it, this is my last time going through this crap.

[bama88]

Think of this as the best birthday present you can give yourself. Your fighting for freedom. Your freedom.  Come on pat. Were rooting for you. I've got my pom poms out. And cake is deserved. Go buy yourself one. Blow out those candles and make a wish. And listen to Sarah. Shes right. This is a journey. Not a destination

[Pat1956100]

lol, I don't think there will be any cake today :(
Just got a phone call from my son to wish me a Happy Bday and he was at the airport off to Mexico for a week.  A friend's wedding.  I got the "I'm sure I told you, I thought you new" thing.  
So no cake for me.  
The best part is that this will be my first birthday clean.  I know I am sick from detoxing and it's not pleasant but at least I am clean.  No pills today.
I can always have cake another time.
Maybe by next year I will be with my family and able to celebrate my birthday.

[Teresa1717]

Yes there are my friend, yes there are! :) You should start by looking forward to getting a peice of cake! ;)

[Pat1956100]

Wow, I got some sleep.  So happy for that.
Not feeling too bad.  Just the morning stuff.  I always felt bad in the morning when I was taking pills so I am used to it.
It's going to be so nice when I wake up feeling good.
It's been a long, long time.
Lots of good things to look forward to.

[Silkie55]

Hi pat, how r u doing? Hopefully you got some rest and today will be a better day. Maybe it will be your hump day when you make it over the hump! Each day you will feel a lil better! Ill say a lil prayer for you!

[dominosarah]

Focus on the journey Pat, not the destination.  We do get to the top of that mountain but it takes awhile as each step is important~

[Pat1956100]

Free
Those are beautiful words of support.
Thanks so much.
You always say the nicest things.

[Pat1956100]

Not a chance of me taking a pill.  Don't even want one (right now). I just want to get through this.  
Thanks so much for your support.
Dana I would love to take a bubble bath but I don't have a tub.  Just a shower.  Big mistake taking out our tub.
I want a tub so badly now. lol