oxycontin-depression

[monk23]

hi everyone,ive been reading the forums for a few months nowbut havent posted till now. ive had past problems with drugs but my most recent is a battle with oxycontin. since about july i have been snorting them off and on but more off than on. these last few months i have been increasing my use to a couple weeks at a time and then quit c/t and suffer through the w/d nly to go back to them when i start to feel beter. this is the last time! i have 2 days clean from a two week binge and the pain is pretty much gone but the depression is intense. depression is always the hardest part of this for me. i had used heroin(snorted about a bag over two days) and was in a depression for about 1 and a half months. i cant believe i have let myself back down in this black pit but I KNOW  cant do this again! i have said that a million times before but i really mean it this time. this depression just isnt worth using.

[monk23]

yeah its getting slightly better but its not over yet. i just need to remember this horrible depression next time i want to get take a pill.

[anotherfinemess]

yeah, 5htp is definitely contraindicated with prozac.  The prozac helps keep your serotonin available for uptake by the bloodstream, but your seratonin levels must be pretty depleted right now i the prozac isn't making a dent.  takes time....

[monk23]

i currently am on prozac and have been for a long time so i know i cant take 5htp. i guess im just going to have to go through the motions again and know that i will never let it happen again. it just gets so hard sometimes when you dont feel it lifting whatsoever. thanks for the responses again.

[anotherfinemess]

of all the supplements suggested on this forum, I have found 5-HTP to be the one that seemed to help lift the depression; you can find it in health food stores-- it is a precursor to seratonin production.  Also if you can get some good sleep, it really helps.  I know the deep, dark place of which you speak and I, for one, AIN'T goin' back!!! You will get through this, have faith in yourself and your bodies' recuperative powers.

[notmenow!]

You are suffering from Dysphoria, common among addicts who have recently gotten clean. It should last no longer than 2 weeks. But is treatable with an SSRI as your brain cannot yet produce
the feel good serotonin.--------------------NOAH

[monk23]

man thank you so much john. it means more than you know to have you reply. yeah i cant wait till this depression lifts but i know exactly what you mean by getting caught up using again when you feel perfectly normal. thats always when i use again. i try to tell myself it wont happen this time or it just doesnt even cross my mind. i am going to stick it out. it is so much better being sober!

[johnnykelly]

The depression goes in a week or so,but thats when we or me i should say seems to forget the hell i felt. monk I relapsed more times in a good mood than not.Its dangerous to say have a few drinks, as when im feeling good, thats when i order up say oxys, cocaine-crack, junk etc.Bro you got day 2 under your belt, i know its a mind freak,but stick it out- all the best john

[johnnykelly]

The depression goes in a week or so,but thats when we or me i should say seems to forget the hell i felt. monk I relapsed more times in a good mood than not.Its dangerous to say have a few drinks, as when im feeling good, thats when i order up say oxys, cocaine-crack, junk etc.Bro you got day 2 under your belt, i know its a mind freak,but stick it out- all the best john

[monk23]

thank you so much for replying. its nice to hear that im not alone in this depression. it sucks because everytime i use i know this will be the outcome but i still snort the things. its so fun at the time but this depression is killer. i  know it will pass because it has before many times, but it just seems unbearable in each and every moment.

[johnnykelly]

Hi monk, I can identify with what you say 100%, as my demon is when i do Crack.Then i like yourself say in a massive depression, ILL never do this again.At that time my depression is so bad i requir some perks or oxys just to feel better.That then gets me in trouble with the dependance on the pain killers, yes this addiction is tough monster.