maybe this time is the one

[BeyondScrewed]

Ive been posting a lot, because you all are just the best group of people I have ever found. I keep saying on here and to myself pretty much every night that tommorow is gonna be the day I get serious. Then usually my wife gets me mad first thing in the morning and before I even leave for work Ive smoked 1 and snorted between 2-4 roxis. Then I figure the day is ruined and just keep goin crazy. Well today I'm workin outside, sweatin and hurtin like crazy. Yet its noon and so far all ive done is swallow (imagine that, I took it like I was supposed to) 1/2 of a pill. So I can just keep goin strong right? Ive been averaging about 10 30's a day on top of my fent patch. I'm shootin to make it through the whole day with a max of just 2

[Fireby29]

Wow.  So much good advice here.  I personally have come to the conclusion that everything I told myself that mitigated my addiction was a total lie.  Getting some serious distance from using has made that clear.  Having a relapse for 10 days has made it VERY clear.  Your on some serious stuff, more then I was, so you may need a little help as others have said.  Now is the time to free yourself.  I am coming to the realization that the cravings are SO much better to deal with then the other life on opium.

Bryan

[vicki595]

Sounds like you're tapering the Oxy ?   Taking it as directed is still taking it and it won't get you anywhere.  You need to start tapering the fentanyl so there's some progress here.

[4adifferentlife]

I hate to think how much money I wasted "buying the last 25," only to keep buying and putting it off.. We are masters at lying and deception, we learn to get really good at it,  I did.. That's one of the best parts to being clean, not having to scheme, flit felt dirty.. I'll compare this life , sober to a deathrow inmate, being pardoned and set free, not even sure that they could feel as good
as I do... And you can feel the same way. Get this problem fixed and you'll soon see, the rest will fall in line.. Many Prayrrs!

[bama88]

Don't put off another day. Were all experts at procrastination.

[Pat1956100]

I still think you should listen to Vickie and taper off the fentanyl before the oxy's.  It will make it much easier on you.
Good luck whatever you decide.  It can be done.

[akitagurl12]

i cant tell you how many times i would tell myself that day 1 starts tomorrow.  It took me awhile to finally make it stick, and it only happened after i realized that all i was doing was keeping myself in withdrawal FOREVER.  I think it is a process, that really starts long before we actually quit.  And for me, all the struggling I did before I quit really made me appreicate this time so much more.  You will get this & I am prayin now is that time for you!  Life is so much easier and better without the drugs.