panic panic panic

[sosad5306]

I am really starting to panic!  I am going c/t starting tonight and I can't believe it. Am I really doing this??  I want this really bad but I am so scared!  How do I live w/out pills how do I get up how do I do anything.  
God, I wish I could fast forward time and be past this!  What is there to live for if not for the drugs?
I really sincerely hope there is something in the clean life that is better than the constant worry of when and how I will get my next fix.  Jesus, I have all but ruined my life and my parents'....I have to have to have to stop.
Sorry, feeling crazy already and w/d's HAVEN'T EVEN STARTED.  How am i going to do this?!?!?!?!?!?!?

[dyblue]

try not to think too much clean the house d0 anything to keep your mind off it.  its the thinking too much not good makes it worse helps me to try and keep busy  the sickness comes in waves so its not as bad as you think thats what I remember about my herion withdrawls .  what ever you do don't smoke a joint it makes the withdrawls worse.  you can do it I going to too.  its 10 am here and its been 28 hrs since the last bit I don't really feel anything until a good 48 I think thats from tapering anyways your not alone scottquit is the best one tpo talk to about withdrawls

[patriot648]

These anxieties are a normal part of the process. Whatever you do, don't let them get the best of you. Part of your brain wants the drugs and the other part knows that it's killing you. Your mind is in a battle against itself...this is why you are flipping out. The only way the 'good' brain is going to win, is if you force it to. You know that taking the drugs will make you feel better temporarily, but you also know that you can't keep using the pills as an emotional patch to cover the sadness in your life. The only way is to erase it...with time, patience and a hell of a lot of persistance, you can fight through the pain and hard days and come out the other side a strong, determined, victor.
When the DT's start getting bad, just remember that it won't last forever. It will get easier. Take it minute by minute. Tell yourself that it's just the flu, and that there's nothing you can do about it. This is an internal battle that you have to win.

[dyblue]

you can do it try not to think too much keeo your mind busy if you can. read the posts that helps take a bath your ready for a great life waking up and feeling good on a summer day. thats where it at. worth a little sickness just remember they say it can't kill us.

[demon child]

stay strong it gets better.im doing it too.8 days no methadone and the hardest part is over.i still feel crappy have wicked anxiety feel like my chest is going to explode sometimes.deep breaths help.meth is long acting so u pry wont be sick as long as i am.heroin withdrawl/pills only last a couple days.once ur through the hard part of the physical which honestly isnt that bad it becomes a mental thing just try to keep focused and your head strong as i am.its tough and im sure u will have weak moments as we all do but it can only get better and i know it will.

[tammyk_40]

8 days without meth. i commend you. thats great. are you sleeping at all or eating? i know it was 10 days c/t before i could eat. and even longer before i could sleep. do you take anything at all for the w/d's.

[sosad5306]

Thank you all for a quick response. I can't even begin to tell you how much it seriously helps to have people to talk to.  I can do this.  I have to keep telling myself that.  bUt I am just so terrified b/c I know that the w/d's won't even start for another few hours.  Ugh, I can barely type!  Is it better on the clean side?  Can anyone tell me?  How do you all get up and do things.  My family (my son 2year old included) deserve this even if I don't.  I just don't want to be like this anymore.  I am in college full time and haven't been to classes in a month  because of my addiction I have let so many things slide...god i am suc`h a loser and I keep thinking (or my addict voice keeps sa;ying) that I could just tke one more week and be on pills and get things done and be more prepared but that is what I told myself last week and it was a lie.  I did nothing!!!!!!!!!!

[dyblue]

thats the depression talking .  I can relate to that.  I think from what I see here is recovery has to be #1.  and its a process. you can do it just tell yourself positive things and do me a favour and don't ever call yourself a loser again I hate that word loser. you are just a human that made some mistakes even Jamie lee Curtis was hooked on Vikes and she sure isn't no loser.  It happen to the best and the worst of people so thats not the issue.  attitude towards yourself is key. learn to love yourself and give yourself a wonderful life summer is comming time is running out I want to feel good for the summer. don't you?

[sosad5306]

Ur right.  Loser is a bad word.  Everyone makes mistakes and thanks for keeping me in check!
You are also right that it can happen to anyone, we are all human!  I want to feel GREAT for summer...I have a YMCA membership and I want to look good and feel good.

[demon child]

its tough but u gotta do whats right not easy and trust me its not easy.cold turkey nothing to help well except tylenol which dosent really help i just tell myself it does

[weaklink7]

You can do this....you need to tell your mind that.  Yes, it is going to be hard, but it IS better on the other side.  I'm day 18 c/t from 5 years of pills and I already feel free of the need to find/beg for pills.  Many many hot baths will help with a lot from physical w/d's to mental.  There were some days I just about lived in the tub.  You can do this sosad and then you will be soglad!!!!!!

[construction]

YOU  CAN DO THIS, IM HERE IF U NEED ME, HOPE AND PRAYERS CLAY TX