Life After Roxy

[emg1103]

My husband has fought his addiction all his life.  It started when he was young, and then he was lost to heroin for several years.  We got married, and he drank.  Then, he hurt his back at work and his boss gave him a percocet.  Then, we separated - I didn't know why he just said he was leaving only for me to find out later about his relapse.  Then, there was doing time for his probation violation.  Then he drank but no drugs until one day he herniated that weak disc and had to get surgery.  Then, there was a rehab. He still drank, and eventually took pain pills again and then cocaine, and then there was a rehab followed by 3 amazing clean and sober years.  He tried to quit smoking two summers ago, but he relapsed on pills.  Nothing major, I caught on, put my foot down and he went to rehab - they were roxys.  As soon as he was out - maybe 30 days, his dad got gravely ill and subsequently died in addition to many other bad things happening.  By June of last year he had a prescription for roxys.  I told him rehab he insisted he could do it on his own and I was stupid enough to believe it.  I told him 30 days to clean up.  He didn't and I tried an intervention with staff from the rehab, but he fled and would not tell me where he was for 15 days.  He never had done this before.  He was like I have never seen him in all the 23 years I have known him. They make him depressed and he is making statements that are despondent and hopeless.  He says he put himself in a medical detox and he went on Rx subox, but he relapsed on roxy again.  On Jan 26, he did his last roxy and began an ibogaine treatment.  He says he has not taken any roxys since.  

My questions are about what is normal now?  He can't sleep, and he will be up til two and three. He is constantly busy.  He is moody.  Some days, he is fine.  He is hostile with me over micromanaging him, and I know it makes him crazy.  However, It has not even been 2 whole months he has been off the roxy.  I had been to Alanon for many years, and if I had listened to them, he would have been dead or missing by now.  I know he loves me, and I am his only family member left as he is mine.  So, we have no one else.  I don't know if what I am seeing are signs of early relapse or if it is expected after roxy abuse.  He was taking 6 (what he told me so most likely 8) roxys per day from May/June 2010 to Jan 2011.  I asked him to take a drug test 3 weeks ago and it was fine.  I feel like he is festering close and struggling to not take them.  Jesus, I need people to pray for us.  I am so tired and so helpless over this.  He has cost us so much money this past year, and the rehab wants me to hire a private interventionist, and then there is the cost of rehab for so long that he needs to be there.  I really don't care about the money and I don't want a dead husband.  He threatened me earlier that he will run again if I put him there against his will.  He may be clean but he is not well, and neither am I in dealing with this.  

[atthebeach]

hello i understand where you are . my huband is now a recovering addict. has been clean for 13 months after 14 yrs .of pills and methadone.i know how sick you can be from the stress and anxiety.does your husband go to counseling with his long time addiction and childhood issues this would be a wonderful thing to help him with his demons. aftercare for continuing recovery is very important. the Lord is a big part of my husbands recovery and the healing and restoration of our family. when you asked for prayer that indicated to me your belief. will he go talk to the pastor?  it would be good for both of you. my husband attends mens groups at church and also volunteers in a christian drug and alcohol rehab. he stayed there for 3 months went he first stopped using we have many people in our church who pray for us. i believe addiction is a spiritual bondage and needs to be broken by much prayer. he needs to reach out for help.he should exercise. take vitamins. eat properly, i will pray. maybe he can get on an anti-depressant for awhile. do you both attend church? take care of yourself.
God bless you
debbie

[sudie58]

hi, i just wanted to wish you well, i know ibogaine is a one off treatment for addiction, and that its helped a lot of folks, its illegal in uk(where i am), its from a plant, i know the ibograine is very expensive, and so would an interventionist be. so it seems he is now in withdrawal from the oxys, i know there are boosters for ibograine, but i dont know any more about it, there are lots of things to help him with his withdrawals, and we can give that help on here, keep posting, god bless

[emg1103]

The rehab was in touch with me before the ibogaine.  I haven't reported back to them since it, because I feel like I am in limbo as to whether he is capable of proceeding without the rehab.  The ibogaine did interrupt his addiction.  He said he had no throughts at all of pills and he never felt that way before ever.  The person who administered the ibogain - it took 3 days of him being completely out, said that he would have no sleep for a long time but that was the opiate damage.  She said he may need something for his anxiety.  He has been very anxious.  In fact, it will wake him up out of his sleep.  Less the last few weeks.  He says he keeps himself busy to take his focus off his anxiety feelings.  He says it is like feelings of dread or something bad is about to happen.  This is what makes it so hard to talk to him about it and it always ends up with him yelling.  There are boosers for the ibogaine, which I see that he needs, we ordered them but they failed to show up in the mail.  FDA doesn't approve them.  He is a difficult man - former foster child and dysfunctional adoptive family, but a good man.  I know he wants to stop and be done with what he calls monster makers, but if he takes one of anything he is gone.  The ibogaine is only taken in one initial dose followed by boosters if needed.  Tell me about how long and what kind of symptoms occur after roxy stops.

[LeaAnn807]

Hi!  I hate to hear that you are going through this.  To answer one of your questions.......it could be relapse or it could be just unhappiness and discontent that some people go through in the first few weeks/months after stopping.  Is he still in any outpatient type of rehab program or doing any aftercare?  Does he have a pastor that he could speak to?  I'm not familiar with Ibogaine.  I've heard of it, but I don't know anything about it.  It could be causing some side effects.  Talk with a doc about it.  Why is the rehab wanting you to hire an interventionist?  I guess I am kind of lost as to where he is in his treatment/recovery right now??  The sleep problems are pretty normal, but they could also be aggravated by any meds that he is on. (Ibogaine?)  I found that my emotions evened out after a while.  His probably will too.  If they don't, he needs to speak to someone about it.  

Good luck with this!  I'm really sorry for you!