Can't do it?

[Weney3777]

I'm crying. I'm on day 4 and sooo fatigued. My husband still has a 10-12 a day lortab habit, and I'm doing this alone(except for the forum). Called my connect today for Roxys(not lortab, right?). After an hour, I changed my mind. I'm really fighting here. Can I do this? My legs still hurt, though not as bad. I'm sooo weak and lethargic. Tried to walk around the block; couldn't. I am miserable. I have legitimate back pain and Dysautonomia(POTS). These forums really help, but I feel so alone. Can't stop crying. Went to church on sunday(day 1). Good start, right? Went to an NA/AA house, but nobody was there at the time. Yesterday i joined a gym, but couldn't work out and left  Ok, I'm lying to myself and everybody. I took a roxy. Maybe that's why I'm so miserable. I feel like a failure. Still crying. God help me.

[Weney3777]

Day 2! Everything's going well. Yesterday was a BIG day. Vitamin store, got braces for my bad knees, worked out at gym, went to cardiologist, picked husband up from work, car broke down, got it towed, met with mechanic. Done at 10pm, and all on day one!  

I really think the Tyrosine works. At least, I don't feel as bad as before. You out there, who are starting out, should try it. Seriously.

Of course, I'm not going to say I didn't consider taking anything, but I didn't. That's what counts. Thanks again, guys.

[peaceinknowing]

I missed yooooooooooooooooou when you got offline lastnight. You should really look into an instant messenger so I can talk to you one on one more easily, rather than through messages here.  :)

I'm glad you're doing well today, and that you're going to the GNC to get some supplements to try and help you through the next few days. I had you on my mind ALL night lastnight and for the better part of today while I was at work. Please keep me posted on how everything goes for you today!

[BIKERDAD1963]

Make sure the tyrosine has b6 in it. You need the b6 in order to obsorb the tyrosine. Good luck

[Weney3777]

Thank you. I know and I'm working on it. Day 1, and I'm going to GNC to get L-Tyrosine this time. Maybe some calcium/magnesium and B vitamin drops. I only took one, so I'm I'm not as down on myself today. Thank you everyone for your advice. I'll keep you posted!

[whitie]

he 's going to spin out sooner or later,just like everyone else does.  keep in mind the longer you are on em, the harder they are to shake.

most peoples stories are complicated too........ addicts come from all walks of life. look at rush limbaugh,betty ford, bret favre and what about all the other people that still had to work, and go through this $**t. executives,politicians and scientist fall prey to pain pills,its not just the poor or homeless

you need to get clean for yourself.....

and he needs to get clean for himself....

[Struggeling09]

Girl I'm so sorry about what happened. I'm on the same day and same drug you are on. I was having your same thoughts and feelings but, if I had anything remotely close to me right now i would take it also. I wish i could have talked to you b4 you took it. I'm sorry to say it but your chances have got to be slim to none with them in your house and a man who is using. Please stay strong and keep posting...dust yourself off and make a plan.

[peaceinknowing]

I hope he quits. Not only for your sake and the marriage's sake -- but also for your sake and the well being of your sobriety. If he's on the phone telling you to go take a Lortab, wouldn't that mean that they're in your household right now?

[Weney3777]

Ok, The rest are gone, and I didn't take them. Thank you so much for your responses. They gave me the strenth to start again. I will definitely go to GNC for the supplements tonight. And yes, I have chronic back pain, but the pills just don't work anymore anyway. One of the reasons I want to get off of them is so I can get relief from my Dysautonomia symptoms(which don't require pain meds).

My husband is another story. When he called and heard me crying, he said, "go take a lortab, Wen." I told him NO, then I went out and got roxies! This is going to be tough, but I know if I can make it 4 days, then this time I can do 5, then 6, then...We really do need to have a talk, but I don't think he's up for it. He works full time(plus overtime), goes to college for his Master's full time, in addition, he has a second job a few hours a week. I really don't see when he CAN quit. I'm hoping I can start by weening him down, but it's gonna be hard. That's why I want to quit first. I don't work, so it should be easier for me.
This is a complicated story, but I have to start somewhere. And if it weren't for you guys, I wouldn't have the guts to even begin.

I'm not crying anymore, and I actually have hope again. Tomorrow is day one, and I thank you(and God) for giving me the strength that I would never have alone.

Wen

[peaceinknowing]

Normally the physical symptoms are vanished by day five or very minimal. Hopefully the pill you took today won't be too much of a set back for you. Just keep moving forward. It also sounds like you and your husband need to have a sit down conversation where all the cards are laid out on the table with his addiction. There's no possible way for you to get the full recovery you want and need right now if there's another user in the household. Please keep these things in mind, and continue to post here.

[whitie]

you can do it you really want it, but your going to have to earn it the hard way. your pain threshold is messed up from the pills, if you can get some time under your belt, then it will come back and be better than ever.


it all depends on how committed you are, and a willingness to burn pill bridges and accept the fact you cannot control your usage. you need to sink the good ship lolly pop, and swim to shore.....

keep this thread going in the days a head

[122 Tactical Fighter Group]

Too bad that you caved in on day four.....thats so very close to being on the downward side od things.  But people arent judged by the times they fall - - - rather its the times that they get back up that count. What can you do differently next time?  First dont take any more of any narcs......one roxy wont start you completely over again, but its not a good thing. Have you taken every step that you possibly can to deal with everything? How about the amino acid protocol? 5-HTP is good for mood and depression, L-Tyrosine is good for fighting fatigue and energy loss, Theanine is like a natural valium. WalMart sells a product called Hylands Restful Legs - some say its very good - also calcium/magnesium supplements and bananas (for potassium and food in stomach) ..... and lots of hot baths/showers!!  Dont worry about the crying, thats what non-medicated people do to deal with emotions. And its not a bad thing.  You are not a failure - - I probably relapsed a solid 30-40 times before I got it right.......now I am at about two years free of narcotic slavery and the only thing I would change, if it were in my power, would be to take this step many years earlier.......................God will help you - keep talking to Him -- but dont expect Him to do all the work for you.......  But you can do the work with His help......

[BIKERDAD1963]

You were almost there. If you really want to quit then dont take anymore and do this. I did the same thing after 3 days ct. I got back on the horse and I am clean now for 2 weeks. Day 3 and 4 are the worse and then it gets better. If you took just the one then make it the last one. The big mistake when we relapse is we take to much and we start the horrible detox again. If you just did the one to take the edge off then it mite not be to bad. you can do this. You no what to expect now and that will just make it easier this time around. We have faith in you so make this your first day of sobriety and start again.

[Susan252]

Hi, I cannot comment on withdrawls so much but please don't beat yourself up:) ok?  I have felt like a failure for even getting myself on these hydros, I am also in chronic pain.  Are you going to a dr. for you pain?  Have you tried an antidepressant to help you with the crying?  I've been crying a lot too, because I am scared, not to quit, but to keep taking these horrible pills, they have a hold of my whole life.  I will be weaning after spinal radiofrequency treatments, hopefully they work.  In the meantime, my friends, here where I live all understand what I am going through and know the pain I live in everyday, and all tell me that I am not a failure, just a person who didn't want to be in chronic pain.  If you are really serious about quitting the roxies then ok you took one, and that's it, no more.  Can you do that?  There are a lot of posts on site here that can help you with the withdrawl symptoms, hot baths, vitamin b, and they have all said that it gets better.  There is light at the end of the tunnel.  You are a winner for going without for 4 days, I won't even attemp that one for myself, so I admire you.  Hang in there.  Susan