I hope you're past this. But your obviously not alone. It took me seeing how a family members addiction was causing enormous an devastating pain in everyone around them, for me to finally after years of abuse, to stop. We all lie to ourselves and say it doesn't effect them and that they don't know. But we never fool anyone but ourselves. And we scourge our families with our selfish abuse.
I don't want you to feel shame. Shame is counterproductive and won't help them or you. Just think what you'd do, the lengths you'd go to, if someone was hurting your family. Then this isn't such the monster we create in our heads. Fight. Because it's your enemy and because you're it's slave. Fight for those people you love that you're causing pain in. Fight because if you don't you'll fade away from everyone, including yourself. God bless you with His strength, in Jesus's name.
After taking a relatively small dose (50mg) of tramadol 3 times daily for approx 3 1/2 yrs I had relocated to another state and changed healthcare providers. Being new to the area I chose pretty much at random from the limited providers in the area and, unfortunately, wound up with an inept moron as a primary care provider.
Now I'm 64 yrs old and not in the best of health and I've run into some pretty low quality doctors in my time but this guy beat anything I've ever seen. Anyhow, long story short, after a couple of months of struggling just to stay current on my meds (I take several regularly) he pushed me beyond the limits of my patience and I wound up with no provider and no way to get my meds.
Side Note: If you're in the area of Athens, Tennessee his name is Kevin Dansby. Do yourself a favor and steer clear of this guy.
Naturally when I fired him he immediately cancelled all my Rx. At that time, I had zero tramadol in my possession and every new provider I've spoken to refused to provide tramadol as treatment for arthritis so the decision was pretty much made for me to stop, cold turkey. At that time, I had no clue how hard it would be.
Step one: The psychological effect of knowing that I was addicted to this med and unable to obtain it was pretty much overwhelming. Although I consider myself a strong minded man, the anticipation of withdrawal was foremost in my mind and seemed to be inescapable. Anxiety would be a mild description. Even after researching and becoming more aware of what I was in for, I was still unsure what to expect as there are so many symptoms which vary individually, thus adding to the anticipation.
Step two: Flu like symptoms. Starting at day two, sinus and chest congestion, headache, nausea, overall body-ache that lasted about 5 to 6 days.
Step three: Insomnia. For lack of a better term, absolutely unable to even lay still, much less sleep. Coupled with the lack of sleep comes lethargy and mild confusion along with many other aspects associated with sleep deprivation alone. This for me was the worst part of the entire experience. My entire body was like a wound up spring just waiting to be released. I cannot say how long this will last as it is still with me today, on day ten.
Step four: Diminished motor skills. Seemingly unable to coordinate simple movements that required the use of both hands at once or similar tasks, I would find myself staring at my hand almost willing it to move. This lasted about a week.
Step five: Nausea/diarrhea. Although I was nauseated to the point of not wanting to eat, I seemed to crave sweets, any sweets no matter what the form and I have never been a fan sweets or snacking. Stay close to a restroom.
Step six: Temper, temper! I have never been a very aggressive person without provocation but I seemed to be hovering on the edge of explosion with even the slightest irritation. I managed to subdue this with the help and understanding of a very loving wife, but it lasted for a week or so.
Step seven: This is my day ten and although I am writing this at 2:30 am due to the ongoing lack of ability to sleep, for the most part things are smoothing out and I consider myself lucky with the understanding that it could have been much worse. So what is next?...Now I have to face the fact that I still have arthritis and that it must be treated and that any med that is effective enough to relieve the pain is addicting. So where do I go from here?
Like you said just do a real slow taper, you may even have to get some more tram to complete the taper, but do it very slow or your body will quickly realize that its not getting its daily fix , I am just starting to taper off a 800 mg a day habit , so ill let you know how its going if you like?
I went through all these withdrawals as well. These are the things that helped me. For depression: NIACIN non flush (take double dose), For Diarrhea: Immodium Liquid not tablets, For anxiety: Try to find some Clonzapem or Xanax but be careful they are addictive, To Sleep: Sleeping pills. Watch a lot of comedy TV, Walk no matter how you feel do some walking. EAT!!! I know you will not feel like eating but it is very important. No matter how little the food but EAT. Also, take a hot shower 2-3 times a day. I hope this helps, it's what helped me. Good Luck Everyone!
Thank you.. I needed to hear this!. I helped me tremendously.
Thank you! I needed to hear this.