Has to still be drinking??

Question

My ex husband has been in and out of the hospital 6 to 7 times in the last 2 years with Pancreatitis. He has now killed the pancreas and is a type one diabetic. He is so skinny and looks yellow at times. He is pale skinned but the last time I saw him he was so red faced and his face was swollen. He has never been to AA or got help except for the times he has detoxed at the hospital. His girlfriend has saw him run outside their home screaming the cowboys and indians are coming making no sense. He states he does not drink. But he has a beer every once in a while. I find this hard to believe??? I have had people tell me that they have seen him out and he is beyond drunk... My confusion in all of this he is 43 almost 44 and looks 70.. How long can his body keep this up and with the type 1 diebetes to deal with one top of that??? 

Just trying to understand????

rpooo · Accepted Answer

The diabetes is brought on due to the pancreas not functioning properly. The most common cause of acute pancreatitis in the United States is alcohol abuse. Sorry there really isn't enough medical information provided to answer your question nor am I qualified to do so. I can tell you that due to the weight loss and yellowing of the skin it's a strong indication he is still drinking and and not eating to get the nutrients his body needs. Advanced liver disease should not be ruled out. The redness is likely due to blood pressure. The best thing he can do for himself is to stop drinking immediately and stick to a strict diet from his doctor along with medications prescribed. 

Randy

Tam0736 · Answer

He has been tot he bar where his sister sings for the past 2 weekends and he thinks that drinking beer verses vodka he has everything under control. His girlfriend should know how he has declines as she has been in the picture 5 years. I had a business with my father and he became ill wilth cancer stage 4 Brain & lung and died within 6 months I did not handle this well. I myself receievd a DUI and my ex and my mother went to court to state that I had a drinking problem and my daughter was put with him. I admitted to the judge my bad judgement call. I have never denied that I am not perfect but what is sad is I am having to go back and show that medically I am Ok and that alcohol is not destroying my life as he wants to state this is all me. He admits to nothing except that he has developed Type 1 diebetes and that is all his problems. I get mad at myself sometimes for keeping my kids one is now 16 and the other 23 for 10 years in this rollar coaster ride with this man and the little one that we had together is 8 years old and she has seen me maybe 5 times within the last  year and has always been with me. I hate that her  father is dying right in front of her and that he has been so cruel with her and kept her away from me.  I always let him have her knowing his problem but a child is innocent in all things. I just hope he can realize his problems and that he loves his children enough to face the problem and get help because I feel he is running out of time. I am glad there is somewhere I can put my thoughts and feelings at and with people that understand what I am going through. I would never wish this on anyone to go through. .

Tam0736 · Answer

He has been tot he bar where his sister sings for the past 2 weekends and he thinks that drinking beer verses vodka he has everything under control. His girlfriend should know how he has declines as she has been in the picture 5 years. I had a business with my father and he became ill wilth cancer stage 4 Brain & lung and died within 6 months I did not handle this well. I myself receievd a DUI and my ex and my mother went to court to state that I had a drinking problem and my daughter was put with him. I admitted to the judge my bad judgement call. I have never denied that I am not perfect but what is sad is I am having to go back and show that medically I am Ok and that alcohol is not destroying my life as he wants to state this is all me. He admits to nothing except that he has developed Type 1 diebetes and that is all his problems. I get mad at myself sometimes for keeping my kids one is now 16 and the other 23 for 10 years in this rollar coaster ride with this man and the little one that we had together is 8 years old and she has seen me maybe 5 times within the last  year and has always been with me. I hate that her  father is dying right in front of her and that he has been so cruel with her and kept her away from me.  I always let him have her knowing his problem but a child is innocent in all things. I just hope he can realize his problems and that he loves his children enough to face the problem and get help because I feel he is running out of time. I am glad there is somewhere I can put my thoughts and feelings at and with people that understand what I am going through. I would never wish this on anyone to go through.

crash2323 · Answer

One round of acute pancreatitis was enough for me.  I was lucky, I went to the hospital right away and did not experience the pain many people do.  I was warned very strongly that if I did not quit drinking, I would have a very painful future ahead of me ending in an early death.  I am 45.  If you are seeking to help him, I'm not sure what you can do.  I cannot imagine his girlfriend does not recognize the obvious signs of terrible health.  Detox can be very helpful, but it is not a long term solution.  He must want a solution for himself and believe that there is a better life.  It doesn't matter what program he selects, he just needs to believe in a better future sober.  I don't know who could suggest that he consider this.  You seem like a very caring person--I pray things work out for the best.  Maybe if someone could just convince him to participate in anything just once, he might continue.  Whether that be AA, individual counseling, group counseling, a consultation with his doctor, or inpatient treatment.  It might change his life.  My prayers are with you.

rpooo · Answer

Hi Tam,
I sure understand your frustration. I have end stage cirrhosis from 20 years of alcohol abuse. I stopped drinking right away and do what I need to in order to help my liver <-- who BTW has been mad at me since this whole thing started! ha ha I'm doing pretty good now. There was a time immediately after diagnosis (03-23-10) that I had to make a decision on what I was going to do. Stop drinking or not? For a few minutes it was actually a choice I considered! It sounds ridiculous but many alcoholics are the same way. Without knowing at the time I can live many years with cirrhosis. Knowing that sure makes a big difference! They only way I learned about it was by reading and learning everything I could about my disease. Many people skip this step and continue life the way they always have. Looking back at my lab results and the problems I was having there is no way I would be here today. It's very sad and I've talked to people that choose not to quit.  Life is so much better without drinking, I can't believe what I was missing all those years. I apologize if I seem to blunt but unfortunately this is how I've seen it to many times.

God bless you to Tam. Please feel free to come back and vent all you like. I like it cause I get to also! ha ha Take care :)

Randy

Tam0736 · Answer

Thank you to everyone responding it was all helpful. I am just at a loss on all of this. He went into a bar this weekend that his sister sings at and he was drinking with his girlfirend. So I know that as an alcoholic he states he only drinks beer so it is all under control. I think I know better than that. I just do not know why he keeps telling people he is not drinking. For the past few years I have watched him decline so fast and I know that he will not be long for this earth as the signs are showing.He has to know that he is not well. I guess he thinks that if he keeps telling people that his problem is Type 1 Diebetes and not that he has drank to the point of doing that to himself then he seals his faith by not accepting and keeping enablers around him. He is full of anger and is very hard to be around... I am just glad I had somewhere to vent this, it has been so hard for several years with this.

anxietyhelp · Answer

If he is drinking then I would say he needs help to detox and stay sober. A friend of mine died at the age of 46 from alcohol abuse with many of the symtoms you describe and plenty more. His pancreas also had been destroyed and next went his liver which eventualy caused the veins in the liver to explode and he bleed to death. Scary stuff.
Best of luck

spanky595 · Answer

Alcohol is a powerful drug with out help it will be to much to handle. When your body starts going down because of drinking and it usually takes a while but things can happen. After a prolong period of drinking and not taking care of self you will look old. My wife had a uncle that had the same thing with diabetes 1 He was found dead in his home from a binge. He needs treatment, detox and aftercare. He will have a better chance.