Are you going to any type of counseling? We as the alcoholics are addicted to the bottle while you are addicted to the alcoholic. It is time to break that cycle. Take care of you. Dont enable him anymore. Your relationship is toxic to both of you. You dont have to live on this roller coaster any longer. You hold the key that will unlock the chains that bind you~~sara
Hello.... I kicked my alcoholic self out on 11/11/11. Some days I miss her so much. I am about your age and live in WA too. I miss the "zoning out"...the no pain feeling....but now that I have been sober for 217 days(and yes I count them...LOL) what I miss the most is not worrying about where my next drink is and when...who will know...who will catch me....those weighed a lot more. You can do it....you have to take one day at a time. Celebrate each day.... and start the next day all over and believe in yourself....it does get easier. At the beginning, I found AA meetings very helpful. Its nice to be around people with the same problem. I would love to chat and help you. Send me a message anytime. And BELIEVE!!!