Roomate and Alcoholism

[Babanker07]

I currently live with two roomates, one of whom is an alcoholic.  He currently consumes 1 to 3 half gallon bottles of vodka in less than a week long period of time.  My other roomate and I are trying to stage an intervention.  What is the best way to bring this up to someone who is an alcoholic.  We just want to let him know that we care.  Any input would be great, thanks very much:)  Also, he hides it incredibly well, however, my roomate and I went in his room and snooped around and found 17 empty vodka bottles.

[ibizan]

well that b cool!b interesting to see how long this lasts....the difficulty is not putting down the drink....the real difficulty is staying STOPPED from the drinking!keep us posted please!

[Babanker07]

Thanks for all your input guys, we actually talked to him a while back, and it's working out well, he didn't talk to us for the first few days, however, he did come around, and we have thrown all the alcohol in our house out, and we as best friends aren't drinking either so it helps him get passed all of this.  Thanks again for all of your words of encouragement:)

[ibizan]

thank u IB!they really do have statistically poor success rates....we both know bottom line is they gotta want it and theres that old worn out saying u bring the bottom up to the drinker but they usually wad it up in a ball and toss it backatcha......so its really a toss of the dice!i think people try them to show themselves they tried to do something....u have a grey8t day urself!

[IBKleen]

You are so right. there are no guarantees with an intervention. I usually suggest that people stay clear of that method for so many reasons.

Thank yu and have a great day!!!!

[ibizan]

A good counselor who knows what their doing that is skilled doing interventions will cost u!No free lunch there!Where I live not many doing them anymore...and when we have done them which is few and far between we had a rehearsal!So many think doing one is a guarantee that the person will wake up and often it is not the case!

[IBKleen]

Interventions are tough, at best. I always suggest that you you do it with the guidance of a professional. They know how to handle the situation so that it doesn't appear to be an attack.

Imagine you sitting in a room surrounded by your loved ones and they start telling you that you have a problem, and you are effecting their lives? OMG..I would RUN out the door.

Please be careful. You could drive him away.

[ibizan]

interventions r a damned if ya do damned if ya don't......% wise many of them r not successful cuz alcoholic don't wanna hear it and so good and blowing others off and going merry drunken sad way!

[jo929]

i forgot to mention that if you confront him he will then know you snooped and that is an invasion of his privacy and he would take it as such i would not want anyone snooping in my room would you want someone snooping in your room think on how you would feel     just a suggestion   jo

[jo929]

this sounds like a very very touchy situation does he know that you girls know of the drinking problem is he a secret drinker a loner you do k-now that you cant stop an alcoholic unless that person wants to be helped. it is good to want to help and be there for him sometimes when confronted a blow up or denial i maybe it would help if you called the AA and get some more advice it all depends to on the personality of the one you are confronting i would think twice before confronting him maybe just drop some hints that you are there for him in case he needs you or maybe just say if you ever need to talk to someone we are here it is a problem    Lots Luck    jo
                    please keep us posted

[ibizan]

no need for the pill bottles in front of him...he'll use that to defocus off his problem on2 urs!how long u been clean for?do u drink?drink with him?if so he'll use that as ammo as well!

[Babanker07]

Thanks very much for your input ibizan:)  Yeah, we were going to stage the intervention after the first of the year, that way it doesn't ruin anyone's holiday plans.  But we're not going to bring his family into this, for the sake of him getting upset, we're hoping that just us two can help him, or at least let him know that we're here for him.  I'm going to set all of my pill bottles in front of him so he doesn't feel alone throughout all of this.  (I had a heavy addiction to hydrocodone for a substantial amount of time) so I think that will help as well, what do you think about this?

[ibizan]

wow this is a toughie!have u ever watched Intervention show and watched how the counselor does it?it is an art form.u gather family,close friends that have been affected by the drinking and in a non-angry fashion give egs. of when/what the drinking upset u.now the difficult part occurs when the drinker gets defensive and tries to take the focus off them and attack u!people must keep a level head and not allow this 2 happen!then all tell the person they want them to get help....and many times the person blows u off and refuses....and sometimes they agree!its a real roll of the dice......good luck!

[Babanker07]

Please any imput would be wonderful:)