Hard liquor

[driftersgal]

My boyfriend is an alcoholic, having started drinking when he was around 10 or 11 yo (I know, really young!).  Then he started doing drugs, possibly when he was about 14.  I'm wondering if after all these years, will just drinking beer (or beer and hard liquor, like whiskey or vodka) cause someone to behave in bizarre manners, hallucinate, or become extremely violent?  He says he quit doing drugs about 1982-1983, but with the way he acts/behaves, I don't believe him.

[driftersgal]

Thank you, lafille!  I definitely need healing, that's for sure.

[lafille1970]

So good to know you will try al-anon.  You need to know that respect anonymity and that your guy will not know that you go to meetings unless you tell him.  They are very aware that violence does happen in alcoholic relationships.  What you say in meetings will be safe. Al-anon is a great place for you to heal emotionally.
good luck sweetie
lafille1970

[ibizan]

Wow..how long have u put up with this BS?lafille has given u some good advice and i hope u follow thru with it and begin to look after ur own welfare!

[driftersgal]

Thank you for your concern, lafille!  Yes, he has been both threatening and actually violent with me!  He's gone as far as throwing a glass of water on me, while I'm in bed lifting the bed up and dumping me out of it, pushing, kicking me, etc.  He's also said he should kill me and threatened to do so.  This last time, he agreed to get help, but of course, didn't do so the same day--and then he "doesn't have time" to go to meetings or other counseling!  Like I told him, if it was important to him, he'd make the time to go.  

I will check out Al-Anon- not just because of my boyfriend, but both my mother and stepfather were alcoholics, and they left some pretty bad scars as well.

[driftersgal]

He's 43 yo................. I think what gets me is he's very secretative, has to go for walks or to the nearest convenience store late at night and is gone for a minimum of 45 minutes (when it only should take about 20 minutes to get there and back).  He also says he hasn't had any whiskey or vodka in "a while" (not being specific-again!).  Yet I found a bottle of vodka in his dirty laundry basket-only about 1/8 of a bottle gone (It was a small bottle).   He claims he doesn't like vodka--in fact, he calls it "sleeping water" because he's had friends die from drinking it (choking on their vomit after they passed out).  That night, what got me is he was sounding like he was drunk, yet he was drinking Pepsi!  You can't get drunk just from Pepsi--unless you're adding something to it.  And!  He has hidden beer bottles/cans from me--all the while trying to tell me he isn't drinking!  

[lafille1970]

my concern is for you.  Has he ever been violent or threatening to you? If yes, you need to keep yourself safe.  I urge you to check out al-anon.  They are a support group for friends and families of alcoholics.  If you are concerned about his drinking or behavior related to this, they can help.  You can contact them by looking them up in your phone book or on the web (al-anon.org   i think)
take care
lafille1970

[ibizan]

how old is this guy?heavy drinking can cause what u describe.....the drugs alone or in combo with the alcohol can as well!