I went of Paxil, twice. Both times I had "recovered" enough to get me off. Also the side effects were just to hardcore, its a gamble panic, or actual physcial side effects like weight and high blood pressure you have to juggle between.
The first time I went cold turkey, I had been on paxil close to 5 years, and the doctor said it was not addictive, so when I lost my job during the 2001 recession, off I went. It was...a mind blowing experience, in a very negative way.
The second time I weened a bit slower, still was horrible but very possible. Expect panic attacks that are a bit more severe, know this happens so it doesnt freak you out, you will not die from the withdrawal. Taper, and know that it will be over soon. The electrical storms, dizzyness, cramps, and panic are severe at first and then taper.
The best advice to give yourself is that tomorrow is better than today, and it will be over soon. I would say between 4-6 weeks you will begin feeling better. The one thing I will definitely say, I have panic now, like I always had, I get attacks, I am nervous and anxious, but I feel life. I remember when my dad died while I was on Paxil, and really felt indifferent, even though I know I should have felt sad, Paxil numbs life, and takes away the highs and lows.
Life will hit you when you stop, make sure you are ready, good and bad, high and low.
You've been on the Paxil quite a long time and you need to understand that it's going to take you awhile to wean off safely and as comfortably as possible.
I am certainly no expert in withdrawing from these types of meds, but I think the way you attempted it before was far too drastic. To skip an entire day will throw your mind and body into chaos, that's putting yourself through "cold turkey" every other day. When you take a dose, your body isn't thinking, "oh, fine, I can get by with less," your body, and mind are reacting like junkies, thinking, "Oh thank God......we got our fix!" (Pardon my use of the word "junkie." I do not believe anyone on these meds is a junkie, I was using it strictly as a metaphor to make my point)
Your intentions were good, but you ended up defeating your purpose, and as you said, ending up in "havoc" and going back on 20mg.
My experience wasn't with Paxil, but with an antianxiety medication that is notoriously difficult to w/d from. My doctor put me on a taper schedule that would have me off the medication in about 2 weeks. A totally INSANE time frame and if I knew THEN what I know NOW, I would have run away from that quack as fast as I could. Long story short, I lived through nearly 4 months of absolute hell before I took myself to the ER. There I was told what was happening to me and what I needed to do to help myself. Through that experience I learned about PMMs............Psychiatric Medication Managers. Why more doctors and therapists don't recommend these professionals is beyond me. They are absolute miracle workers.
PMMs can be found in many psychiatric clinics and hospitals. Their job is to help people manage their psych meds and they do this by helping them find the right one or helping them withdraw from one they are on. They work very closely with you on a one to one basis and taylor a program that fits you.........not some generic formula out of a book. If you feel you're going too fast, they will slow you down. If you're having breakthrough panic/anxiety, they can write a script for a "rescue med" to help you over the rough patches. They follow you every step of the way. They make it as easy and comfortable as possible, and of course, safety is their priority.
As for natural remedies that will help you during the withdrawal period, I would suggest you go over to our Complimentary Medicine Forum and talk to the folks there. They will be able to offer you many suggestions and support.
You won't be stuck on this drug the rest of your life, but it may take you some time to get free of it. Patience is the key.
Peace
Greenlydia