Anxiety and Physical Symptons

[Birdie14]

Hello,

So since December I noticed a change in myself that has been worrying me. At the beginning of December, I was treated for gonorrhea, and that same week my dad lost his job and got me and my family kicked out of our house. On top of that my parents have been nastily divorced for a year. I am 20 years old in college and I was in school when all this happened, and it was finals week when all this went on. When I got "home" I moved in with my grandparents. While there I was also treated for BV and the medicine (flagyl) that was given to me messed up my stomach and that was treated too. But on top of all of this my anxiety has been incredibly high, I cannot eat and find myself nauseous often as well as some abdominal pain. I wake up in the morning sometimes with my heart racing and, also have some shortness in breath. I have struggled with some heightened acid reflux with this as well. My biggest anxieties while home for winter break were my broken family (i am close with my three brothers), and I have started to come to terms with a sexual abuse encounter that happened when I was a child, and thirdly I was terrified I had HIV, although that fear has passed although I am a huge hypochondriac. My skin has also become incredibly sensitive with red blotches on my shoulders after showering and I have gotten some canker sores in my mouth. My boyfriend has blocked many medical websites for me to stop googling things as well. I just don't know what is wrong with me, I've been to so many doctors who have told me that I am okay, and blame acid reflux and anxiety. I started seeing a therapist at school because of issues with my family but I can only meet with her once every two weeks. I actually just sit here crying because I have lost weight and have never been so hyper aware of my body and negative thoughts. I just find myself checking every little thing and I just can not grasp I am okay. I am sorry this post is everywhere, I am brain dumping everything. Any response is appreciated and if anyone has tips to help me out I would be so grateful. I am just weirded mostly by how unlike myself I have become and I just want to get better.
Thank You

[Paxiled]

This forum is replete with people who do what you're doing, but they don't have all the things happening to them that have happened to you.  Give yourself a chance to feel the pain of the very real crap that's happened in your life.  If you can get one of your parents to pay for it, more regular therapy might be better.  Stop Googling!  Google can help when you have a diagnosis to make sure the doctor is doing the right thing, but you can't Google symptoms and learn anything useful as the same symptoms can mean a million things or nothing at all.  As for your stomach problems, that's your diet and the way you eat, and the medication you mention is notorious for causing side effects.  It does this in part by killing off the beneficial organisms that help you prevent parasites from finding a nice home in your intestinal tract or just by depriving them of space to move in.  You can replenish some of these by purchasing the best probiotic in the refrigerated section of your best local health food store, and make sure it has bifidus in it -- that's very important for proper digestion.  Stress and grief make us all weaker for awhile, so at those times you need to take better care of yourself until time gives you distance.  Meditation and exercise can be helpful.  

[Birdie14]

Thank you so much, it's nice to have the reassurance that I am actually not sick (or dying). It's that I am stuck in this depression and anxiety. I am trying to find a more frequent therapy meetings. I have been taking a probiotic vitamin supplement, but I will check the refrigrated section for a better option. I still find myself just wanting to be alone and turn down fun events just to sit around. But thank you so much for this little boost to help me on the road to improving my mental health.