Anxiety

[Rahuls01]

Hi friends,i am 23 male from india new here and really need a help.i am sufferin from chronic anxiety.i am going to married in few months I am becoming anxious day by day.i don't want to take medicine at all but now it seems like It is imposible to live without med.but because previously I have used medicines that gave unplesant sexual side effects,and this thing making my situation worse.i can't do counselling because it is too expensive for me.i could please help me. . .    

[Rahuls01]

Thanks jen

[Alisonj29]

I should add that it took me many different therapists before I found one that didnt just sit and listen but gave me the tools I needed to work through things. She would give me a "homework" type assignment to complete for my next appt. Sometimes you have to keep looking until you find a therapist that is the right "fit" for you.

[Alisonj29]

My name is Alison and you can message me anytime. I will add you as a friend, and anytime you need to chat I will be here to listen.

[jlroesner]

Rahuls,
I am so sorry that you are going through all of these confusing and trying emotions.  I agree with what the other girls said, that you need to see a doctor and be honest with them about your fear of the sexual side effects.  When I finally told my doctor of the sexual side effects I was experiencing, she just added another little med to my repoitre and voila, no more sexual side effects!  Oh my, it was so easy to fix ~ why did I wait so long to tell her?  It is easily overcome, at least in my opinion.  Also, I think anyone would feel some anxiety over an impending wedding, even if you very much want to be married to the person to whom you are engaged.  It's just such a life-altering event with a whole new set of expectations with a huge side of the unknown!  Do try to get in and see a therapist.  Most therapists don't talk much at all.  The whole point is for you to discover many of the answers on your own, with them just there as a guide to step in and keep you on track if you stray.  Therapy can be a long process, but for me at least, I would have weeks of what seemed like no progress (in my mind) only to be shocked by an "A-ha" moment when things came together.  Then it is blessed, blessed release and relief.  You just have to have patience and faith in the process.  I wish you peace.  Jen

[Rahuls01]

Thanks alisonj for taking care of my problem,i woul sure find a counseller but many times before I have visited but didn't continue because I was not getting benifit.he was calling me every week and he was only listning to my problem and did nothing for solution.where are you from?and ur name may I share my problem with you I have no one trusted friend near me to share my problem all are annoyers.i am feeling alone and hopeless.please be in touch.what's ur  problem can you please tell?what type of treatment are you getting?  

[Rahuls01]

Thanks alisonj for taking care of my problem,i woul sure find a counseller but many times before I have visited but didn't continue because I was not getting benifit.he was calling me every week and he was only listning to my problem and did nothing for solution.where are you from?and ur name may I share my problem with you I have no one trusted friend near me to share my problem all are annoyers.i am feeling alone and hopeless.please be in touch.what's ur  problem can you please tell?what type of treatment are you getting?  

[Alisonj29]

You may need meds but I think that you would really benefit from counseling. Being able to talk to someone about your self esteem and other issues I think would really help you. This is obviously affecting your life alot and you have to do something to get better. Talk to your doctor regarding medication and see if they think thats what you need but for sure find a good counselor or therapist.

[Rahuls01]

Thanks friends,i think the root of my problem lies in me although my anxiety is chronic but right now after being fine I am again puttin myself down I am doing the thing again and again which gives me emotional and physical pain.while knowing meds are dangerous for sex life but my mind is not ready to accept it.another part of mind is forcing me to take meds,and another part says that it is managable.i am facing extreme emotional pain  again I destroyed my health.i don't have control on myself.my behaviour and habbit destroying my life.everything from social to personal.i feel I am being watch,increased shyness.negative body-image,always feel I am looking too ugly but reality I am not.please suggest have I any big problem do I need med or it can heal itself.please help...,        

[german41274]

go to a therapist. meds are like putting a band aid on a gunshot wound. You need to get to the root of the problem.

[mooksmom]

It's obvious that you know what the treatment is, but it's too expensive for you. Any medication, that treats anxiety, can get you hooked on it and in a short time. Once on benzodiazapines with no other treatment, you will be heading down a long and sad road. Something maybe your bride needs to know. Anxiety IS treatible.

[Alisonj29]

Great questions asked above. I think you need to see your doctor and tell him your concerns with the medications. Work together with him and you should be able to come up with something. Are there any government funded counseling programs available at all? You need to let him know exactly how you are feeling and I am sure you can both come up with something that can help. I wish you luck,and hope that you can get help asap.

[bke6h]

Did this start as you got closer to your wedding or were you suffering from anxiety previously and now the wedding date is just adding pressure to you making it worse?  Do you have any idea of the root cause?