anxiety/panic disorder/depression//hypochondria

[terrysam]

hi

i have been ill for nearly a year, i wasn't going to speak about this, but after seeing the amount of people sharing their experiences, so i would like to share mines and see what you think. i am from uk in my early 30's

i was made redundant last year in febuary from a job, but i don't think this truely added to my stress in anyway as i was planning to leave work soon, anyways a few weeks later,  my grandads brother had a stroke and lost the ability to speak and walk and a few days later he past away.

a week after this i woke up with tingling sensations in my arms and face, with breathlesness, dizzyness i was certain i was having a stroke (this was in summer last year). this is when all my problems began, i was constanly out of breath, weak lethargic, felt like i was about to faint. I did go drs who did a few blood tests and said it was depression. i was in and out of A&E for dizzyness they would say i may be comming down with a flu, they blamed it on it possibly being bird flu as there was a high number of people in my area who had it. At this point i began to feel a feeling of brainfog, symtoms of depersonalization, tingling sensations in my face and arms, i began to get symptoms of sinus infection was placed on antibiotics, i spent alot of time using the internet as drs were not helping so i would look for help with my symptoms. my blood pressure became low and heart rate increased also i fainted once and my sugar levels were very low, i believe i wasn't eating too wel.

I was called in to the drs a few weeks later and was told that my liver function test has been slightly abnormal but when checked on the record it has been out for many years and i was never informed of this before, any ways this is where i put 2 and 2 together and i began to think i am having hepatic encephalopathy, which would explain the brainfog and altered feeling of conciousness. so it added to my stress to find out my liver wasn't doing wel.
This does sound crazy, my family were so worried to the extreme that they spoke to spiritual/religious people, who diagnosed me as having some kind of magic attached to me, apparently it was removed from me, yet no cure.

i wont go into it further but for nearly a year i stil have the same mental feelings, im not all here and im in a dream world, i had eye inflamation for a few months, which included photophobia,eye pain, finally i was on steroids (from a MD) which fixed my inflamation leaving me with eye floaters, a constant reminder that  somthing had gone wrong with me. for my hypochondriac side, i kept a diary of a list of diseases, illnesses i could be having, i would also note the day and how i felt and cross out illnesses/diseases which i have checked for.

after all these months comming to a year (positives)

i dont get breathlesness as once i did, no more fainting, not much nausia, no one sided headaches or sinus pains, eye inflamation has gone, my weakness is stil there but not as weak as i once was.
i still get weird tingling feeling in my arms but mainly on the sinus areas (i have noticed when i become more of a hypochondriac i get more of these, so i only ge them maybe once a week or less)

i am left with (negatives, as in changes due to being ill)
eye floaters (probably due to inflamation)
palptations,
lower blood pressure,
lower heart rate,
i have lost 2 stones.
i still feel as if my minds going crazy, as if my blood is toxic causing me to feel dizzy and half drunk. brainfog, depersonalization,altered feeling of conciouness, living in a dream world
very weak,

i have had alot of gastritis and had been checked for gastrititis i also have ulcers in my deodenum, so i am working on getting this sorted with a GI specialist.
My liver is still under question and is being looked at soon.

i am keeping strong, it's just hard as i had so much planned and its all gone down hill lol. i just want to share my experience, i know most of my problems are self inflicted due to stress/ thinking. but i also beileve some illnesses are like a bomb waiting for a trigger to lite it up.the mind is soo powerful.

in my religion they say,

"God is the best of planners"  mans plan can change, but gods plan is surely a plan that will remain, as thats Gods wil.



.

[terrysam]

oh and not forgetting diabetes and hypoglycemia lol.

[terrysam]

hi, thanks for the reply greenlydia, wel i believe and im sure tattoodude believes, that god (supreme being) has a plan for everyone, whether it's a small plan or a big one. "Every one thing has a story to it" even a spec of dust has a story to it. i am seeking for help from professionals, and doing my bit searching for answers, i'm hoping (God is hope) to have  a cure one day.

No tattoodude, i don't take any anxiety drugs at all for anxiety, never have, even though i been like this for a year today.

tattodude have you considered, checking thyroid, liver, adrenal difficiencies, lyme disease, allergies, some kind of defficiency like calcium? maybe a scan of the head too? somtimes a spinal injury can do this to or a neck injury, i've heard stomach and intestinal problems can do some simular things even the bacteria h.pylori and candida, yeast growths, certain  autimmune diseases. it seems like anxiety alone can cause alot of these symtoms that many illnesses cause too.

[RubyWitch]

Along with complete physicals, I would strongly urge both of you to consider getting into some therapy.
While there is nothing wrong with taking a medication to help with your anxiety, pills are only going to mask the symptoms and will do nothing for what is causing your anxiety. Until you find the root cause of your anxiety and deal with that, you will continue to suffer with it.
I am not a religious person in the same sense that you are, but both of you believe God has a plan for you. Could Gods plan not include both of you seeking help for what is making you unhappy?
I wish both of you the very best.
Peace
Greenlydia

[tattoodude]

lol i have definately become very anylitical and read into every little move i make and symptom with this. the medication i am on currently is klonopin, and so far all it does is help me sleep like a champ but i wake up every day feeling super groggy. i have an app later this month and im gonna request to try something different. do you currently take anything for your anxiety and would you recommend it?

[terrysam]

hi

thanks for the reply, you seem to be going through alot, when my symptoms first began, i had constant head pressure, weakness, out of breath, feeling of fainting any time,dizzyness and i still have the depersonalization.

after reading about many anxiety experiences, it seems these are typical anxiety symptoms, do you take any medication for it?

i know this sounds weird and odd, but when i was younger i would play games where id pretend to be a robot and im sure i've experienced this depersonalization feeling whilst pretending to be a robot, maybe, because we get anxious and watch our everymove, focus more on ourselves and the surroundings like an examiner, we transform into a kind of robotic mode, we begin to think before we move, rather then moving and doing things naturally. maybe we need to re-train our brains.lol if that makes sense, i think i'm losing it on medhelp lol

[tattoodude]

your anxiety could be related to all the stress youve experienced from your illness. everyone has some kind of anxiety at some point in their life. something definately triggers the extreme anxiety that causes us to develop an anxiety disorder. for me it was my family moving 4 states away! that was 5 years ago.

my current state is so bad that i have the depersonalization, nothing seems real, constant pressure in my head, dizzy all the time, constant feelings of passing out. this is very overwhelming and at times there seems as there is no hope.

i agree that that God does have a plan for our lives and sometimes we dont understand it but we go through these things for a reason