Zoloft / Sexual Side Effects

[teenylbc]

Hey guys, this is my first post in the forum, but i'm looking for some help / support!

Long story short, my boyfriend of two years, suddenly started having panic attacks, and bad anxiety, about 6 months ago. After trial and error w/ lexapro, he has been on Zoloft for about 3 months now, and it seems to have restored his energy, making him able to work (the thing hes most concerned over.) However, w/ that he has had a ton of side effects:

Including, being very distant, periods of days where hes happy and emotional, and the next he has no feeling (or it seems that way to me) what so ever, also adding to the list, his sex drive has changed significantly. We used to be very sexually active, atleast 6 times a week, so almost everyday, but now it usually happens once a week. He primarly states the problem is, it is really hard for him to achive an orgasm when we have sex. He has no problem getting off on his own, and usually sex ends in him manually stimulating himself. According to several websites this problem only occurs in 11% and there isnt much information surrounding it.

& Just to touch on the withdrawn emotion, I can't find much on that either. I would like to say I am very outgoing and it takes a lot to upset me; however, with my boyfriends emotions constantly changing, I feel like I'm on a roller coaster with my feelings as well. I know that he doesn't mean to purposely be distant, ie. being in the car for two hours having a one sided conversation with myself, but at this point i'm not sure what to do.

I know he should really talk to his doctor more about his side effects, but I believe hes scared to go back to how he was if they switch his medication and it doesn't work. His doctor also doesn't seem to be too concerned with his well being, because he told him about several side effects and the doctor told him just to wait to take his medicine on the nights he wants to have sex, but there are more underlying issues that i'm afraid aren't being addressed.

Any information, or even links you have would greatly be appricated.

[Paxiled]

These meds do often alter personality.  Paxil made me angry and aggressive.  They all have given me that wonderful sexual effect AnxietyGuy and you mentioned.  Again, not to get too graphic here, but you can do something about the sexual thing but nothing about the personality thing.  It's up to him if it feels better this way or the other way -- it is hard to find a med that actually works.  But the sexual thing can be turned into part of your mutual affection by you being involved in the the manual part.  It won't increase his desire, but when you do have sex it'll be more fun.  Just make sure you both get what you need.  Good luck to both of you.

[AnxietyGuy1976]

Ah, I forgot to mention something important in all that.

************ If he's concerned that his doctor doesn't care, or that his doctor doesn't take the proper time to discuss things (saying wait to take your meds on a "sex day"), maybe he should consider switching doctors ***************

Then again, sometimes doctors are busy, or maybe try to use less words as a less-is-more strategy. They're also humans, and can be lazy, stupid, greedy, or uncaring, just like anyone else might turn out in life. Not all doctors are alike, and this is still a free market.

However, it may be easier for him to seek a therapist or psychiatrist, without having to deal with swapping his GP who may not be that skilled in these matters anyways (most are not).

[AnxietyGuy1976]

I'd assume it's FAR more common than 11% in males.

I have not taken Zoloft personally, but I have taken Lexapro, which is also an SSRI. I won't get too graphic, as this is a public forum without an age limit, that I'm aware of. Let's just say, I too had a similar problem finishing with a partner, a lot of the time.

Definitely don't take it personally. He may even be feeling the same urges as before, but he could be frustrated that he's not fulfilling your expected needs, or feels awkward handling things on his own, at the end, so to speak.

Talk about it carefully, and with an open ear. Be supportive. I found that while it took a while at first, I became better at achieving "normal" results. Sometimes spicing things up in ways you didn't used to, might help him get that extra stimulus.

As far as the second part of your post, that was actually the reason I ended up getting off of an SSRI altogether. Granted I was on one for a couple years (back then), or there about, and felt ready to do so, but it was my emotional detachment that made me decide that I had to give it a try on my own again. I'm sure I'm not alone in having that as a major side effect.

Certainly, if you're concerned that it seems like these side effects are maybe not too common, or mentioned online, I can re-assure you that they were the two most prominent side effects I have had while on an SSRI, and by talking with many others that have taken SSRI's, they're very common in general.

That doesn't mean that the SSRI won't help considerably.... Of course there may be alternative medications that could be tried, but they may have side effects too.