Actually, the OB may be WRONG. In some studies it has shown that the effects from the woman coming off the drug are more harmful to the baby than taking it! You might ask about Wellbutrin, it is considered generally safe during pregnancy, and you can use it to taper off the drug you are currently on. Yes, Yoga is wonderful, I do it myself, but I have severe panic attacks, actually I am a THERAPIST, and I still have to have meds. to control my anxiety. Try 6 mg. of Xanax XR, not what you'd expect a therapist to be taking in addition to other meds. I am currently not pregnant. I am off of Pristiq. My dr. wants me down to 3 mg. or less of Xanax XR. Both of my doctors agree that due to my severe panic attacks, the benefits of the meds. outweigh the risk. I hope to be able to come off of more than that. And yes, it is great to not take anything at all during the first trimester, but some people can't do that. If I got pregnant tomorrow and stopped my Xanax, the withdrawal that I would go through (I've been there) would probably kill the baby. I would recommend you talking with your DO some more about different meds. or alternative treatments since you are worried, and that shows you care. Ob's are trained to say, "No meds." I'd actually suggest getting some communication between the 2 docs. if willing...
Your OB is right. You should never take any psychotropic medication while pregnant or trying to become pregnant. The first trimester is so important in regards to your baby's nervous system development. Your would-be child might not manifest problems right away (or it might), but they could crop up later in the form of OCD, ADHD, anxiety, depression, learning disabilities, autism, etc. You wouldn't want to pass on to a child what you're suffering right now. If you can't get off the Effexor and stay off it (and all other drugs) for the duration of a pregnancy, then give up the idea of pregnancy for now. You have a beautiful, healthy little girl. I think you should thank God for what he's given you already - a healthy, happy child. Try yoga, meditation, biofeedback, etc. to help ou get off the drugs and when you do, and you know you aren't going to need them until after delivery, then consider pregnancy again. Anxiety is bad for a baby, too.
Sure, some people have had children while on Effexor and things are seemingly fine, but that's just luck. The ones who've had problems probably aren't going to tell you about it. Look up the drug insert. It's going to tell you not to use it during pregnancy. I'm sorry if this sounds harsh, as it's not meant to be, but the health of a would-be child must come first. If you truly can't come off it, there's adoption or maybe a surrogate mother to carry the child. But you really shouldn't become pregnant. It's far too risky for the unborn baby.