Just want to feel normal again Panic Attack/ Anxiety please help

[Luke55]

Hi Everyone
About two months ago I experienced my first panic attack. I smoked weed for the first time and I walked upstairs into my friends room and the worst fear I have ever felt in my life overcame me. I had 4-5 panic attacks that one night and ever since then I've been feeling weird and having strange thoughts. I get to thinking about life and the meaning and I can't stop wondering weird things like if i'm in a coma or just in a dream and nothing's real or if i'm the only person in the world and everything that exists is just a projection of my imagination. I just want to feel like I'm normal again. I've had one minor panic attack since but I really just need to feel normal again. I'm getting more and more paranoid to the point where I can't sleep and am afraid to be alone in my own house or room. I can't continue life this way. I haven't told anyone about this or any doctors and I don't know if this happens but please any help would be appreciated.

[Luke55]

not sure why i cant post my email but i'll space it out it's
"l u k e f a n c y 5 1@ g m a i l . c o m

[Luke55]

I sent you a pm don't know if it sent though. My email is ***@**** thanks again for all your help you have no idea how much this means to me

[Luke55]

Thank you so much. I really appreciate this help. I just looked up derealiation on wikipedia and it explains exactly how I feel. When I read, "Frequently, derealization occurs in the context of constant worrying or 'intrusive thoughts' that one finds hard to switch off. In such cases it can build unnoticed along with the underlying anxiety attached to these disturbing thoughts, and be recognized only in the aftermath of a realization of crisis, often a panic attack, subsequently seeming difficult or impossible to ignore," I wanted to start crying. This is exactly what I feel like and it's horrible. I feel like my life isn't really mine and that I'm sitting at a computer in a room somewhere and my body is just a robot.

[edgyboy]

The feelings you have sound like anxiety. I  can relate to just about everything you feel. That marijuana thing really screwed me up back then.

You do sound like you have some derealization and depersonalization. I can send you some information on the two electronically that I think you will find helpfull.

Send me a PM with your email address and I'll send it out to you soon as I can. It really will explain alot of what you are feeling.

You have more of an advantage over me than when I first had this happen to me. You have more studies, the internet and more people speaking out on how they feel. 40 years ago, I had to hunker down and deal with something I had no clue about.

So, I think you will be ok. Take advantage of any resource to deal with this and work to recover.

[Luke55]

well I just don't really feel normal. I feel like I'm kind of isolated from reality. I feel like i have my guard up 24/7 like I'm protecting myself from something. I can't go to sleep at night because it feels like I'm not alone and I haven't really felt that way before my first attack. I can't watch anything scary anymore because it freaks me out too much. I'm rather paranoid to say the least. I feel like I have a little bit of both of those two things that you mentioned. I don't feel like myself anymore at all and I feel as though i'm losing touch with reality

[edgyboy]

What are your symptoms again? Do you have derealization or depersonalization? You can look it up online to see if you have these symptoms.

[Luke55]

Thank you so much for responding. The reassurance is probably the most important thing in all of this. I just need to know that what's happening will go away. Knowing that this is most likely the case, I think it will be easier for me to move on. I have indeed given it up as i know it surely isn't the thing for me.  I just don't know whether or not I should reach out to somebody or if I should wait it out and see if it will just go away on it's own. My guess is I'll probably wait for this whole thing to end and hope it doesn't get worse. Thank you so much for responding and helping me through this time.

[edgyboy]

another big decision. (sorry I accidently pushed post). suggest you give up the weed for good as this will no doubt happen again, maybe even more severely.

[edgyboy]

This happened to me when I was 20 yers old. It was horrible! So I know exactly what you are going through. I walked around for almost a year thinking about every aspect of life. I use to feel overwhelmed by my thoughts to the point I would panic.

That was almost 40 years ago. Back then no one knew much about stress and anxiety. Like you, i didnt reach out to anyone for fear that they would only think I was crazy. I actually thought the weed "blew my mind" and it would be a permenant condition.

Nekoman is correct in his assessment of the weed sparking off a preexisting condition. This would have come out evenually at some stressfull point in your life (like now).

You are at an age when you will be questioning things in life. You will be making decisions about your future that can be stressfull and overwhelming. Leaving home is ab

[Luke55]

thank you very much for respoding. I just have had enough and I want to do something about it. I feel like nothings real anymore. It's just been so tough these last few months with Junior year of high school and college searches and stuff like that going on so maybe that has contributed to it. You don't know how much you're response means to me. Thank you

[Nekoman]

It will probably go away on it's own -- the bad feelings will become milder and milder, but you may still have a touch, or even some moderate anxiety residually, that may never be totally gone.  There's no shame in talking to a doctor.  A little medication might be in order.  Remember, that things won't always feel this way, and that there are ways to feel better.  The weed may have set off a pre-existing condition, such as some general anxiety disorder.  It may take a while to figure out how to control it.  You have many options to try.