I can't eat with my girlfriend

[nay4567890]

I've been going out with this girl who I am in love with for four months now.  Everything is great except for one thing.  When ever we go out to eat, I can't eat with her.  I can be very hungry, yet the second I see food or have to try to eat it, i feel as if there is something blocking it from going down, and if I try to force it down I will throw up.  I feel fine before and after eating, it's just eating with her that's a problem.  This has happened every time we go out to eat together and I don't know what's going on.  This is the first girl I've really had true feelings for and I'm thinking that may have something to do with it.  This has never happened in my life before except for with her.  I have a very good health record in the past, nothing that would lead to this, and when I'm not with her I can eat normally.  I see her every day around campus and I have tried eating light with her, but even things such as ice cream made me feel like I was going to throw up.  Luckily I haven't thrown up with her yet, but I have gotten to the point where I have had to swallow the throw up back down and it's only a matter of time until I do fully throw up in front of her if this continues.  

Can anyone give me some help on this?  I would rather try to fix it than avoid it because sooner of later, I am going to have to eat with the one I love.  Can anyone determine what I'm going through?  Any thoughts are appreciated!  Thank you!

[kenziegirl]

babsbunny,

dont waste your money on any other doctors or tests cuz you dont have stomach issues i promise. its alll symptoms of anxiety. whenever i get anxiety i have feel super nauscious and I have to go to the bathroom every 5 minutes. It is completely normal. Once you over come your anxiety your stomach will go back to normal. just dont run from it. you will get better.

[kenziegirl]

I totally understand. We have panic disorder. which is basically fear of fear. you have created triggers for yourself so you think you will have  panic attacks if you go out in public or certain places and even the thought of it makes you nausious. i have the same thing. I get reallly bad anxiety in the morning and at night. I have been going to CBT therapy for the past month and even though its really tough i think it is helping. it is all about facing your fears and putting yourself in situations you dont want to be in to overcome them and eventually the anxiety will go away. but if you keep running from it. it will keep getting worse.

[Babsbunny77]

Wow.  I'll join the club bc this has been happening to me FOREVER.  I didn't really put it together until about last summer when it got REAL bad.  I was dating someone and I just could NOT eat with him.  He ended up breaking up with me... which was probably the worst thing he could've done... bc now it's given me even MORE of a complex about it.  Mine is a lovely combo of indigestion, diarreha, and vomitting.  I am now at the point where I just have to be overwhelmed and it happens... I don't even have to be out with them.
I went to my doctor... she did a physical and an ultrasound... and it all came out fine.  I opted for no endoscopy or colonoscopy... as once we broke up, the symptoms miraculously disappeared.  However, now I fear they are back, as I'm dating someone new... and so I went back and was forthright with how I felt it was anxiety-driven.   She gave me a very small prescrip of xanax which seemed to help initially... although, last week, I went to dinner and out of the blue, we finished the meal and were settling the check and i had an overwhelming sense of nausea.  I just about made it home in time before all hell broke loose. I am at my wits end... I'm about 5'2... about 110lbs... I run about 15 miles a week and go to a trainer... so I do have outlets for stress... and yet, nothing seems to work.  I have pepsid AC, which sometimes works... but not always.  I wish I could get to the bottom of it.. as I don't want to lose another guy to my stupid stomach issues.  

[cryst4l]

hi i understand how u al lare feeling but i have been with my BF for 5 years and i have never once eaten with him. obviously it drives him mental cus we never go out anywhere to eat and i never eat with him. even when i go out to restaurants i cant eat i will starve than eat... im nto marrying this guy and im like how the hell am i going to be able t eat with him. i have told him i cant eat with him but he just thinks im silly and not to worry ..its nto just him its even with close friends and in restaurants i cant eat.. the onl ypeople i can ea twith is my mum dad and brothers....

[marnee312]

WOW, honestly..I have the same exact thing !! :)..it actually gets a little bit easier to breathe right now knowing that all of these people on here have that same panicy feeling ESP. out in public. As soon as I even walk into a public place (ANYWHERE) I get choked up, breathing gets heavy & I also produce alot of saliva so swallowing gets even harder to do & that interferes with my breathing cause I feel like I'm choking!!! AHHHH! I hate it so much. Let alone sit & eat out with my BF of 4 years?! FORGET ABOUT IT! as soon as I sit with food in front of me I get all jittery and then can't breathe & lightheaded. The next thing I know I'm in the public bathroom kneeling down concentrating on breathing mechanisms...Or..outside. This also happens to me every day at home usually at noon or so and then before bed. I don't feel like the same person I was a year ago before this all began! :( The only thing that allows me to go out in public is drinking and feeling a nice strong buzz...which I try to avoid since my grandma was an alchoholic..so I find myself at home all the time...I cannot sit still even at home.  My heart is palpitating as of now...I dont know what to do anymore...I feel at times I need more sugar to make this constant light headedness feeling go away, which ultimately leads to numbness and tingling in my hands and feet. My boyfriend thinks Im insane & doesn't understand at all..says its all in my head. But its not, I feel it all too much to be in my head.
Anyone know my symptoms ?! grrr...
Marnee

[fltricia]

This used to happen to me.  One time it got so bad I had to break up with a guy I really really liked.  I used to lose my appetite everytime I got a boyfriend until I was about 16 and I met an easy going guy who was my friend first.  

It also helps when other people are not involved in your relationship.  When other people would get in our business it would stress me out.

You can try a homeopathic remedy like Calms before you go out to dinner and see if this helps at all.