Aa
I don't know what to do
I can't figure out if there might be something seriously wrong with me or if it is just because of the transition from childhood to adulthood. I am 17 years old, graduated, and am scheduled to leave for military bootcamp 10 days from now. There is alot of doubt and fear whether or not I am making the right decision. I find it hard to come to a decision and stick with it over the simplest things. I tend to over-analyze every situation even.
In the past I had taken Lexapro for depression, Resperedahl for sleep, and Trileptal for racing thoughts/mood swings. About 3 years ago I was also hospitalized in a mental facility for 2 weeks. I have been off those medications for at least 2 years and have been fine until these past few months. Since then my sleep pattern is off and I am finding it really hard to concentrate on anything. I can't remember a conversation I had just had 1 minute prior. I try to think about things and pieces of different thoughts come together and make no sense. I don't think my psychiatrist officially stated that I have a mental illness but it does run heavily on my mothers side.
I'm scared that I might make a huge mistake in my life as a career decision and a mental health decision. If I have something I need to get it treated and the military is not the place to go.
In the past I had taken Lexapro for depression, Resperedahl for sleep, and Trileptal for racing thoughts/mood swings. About 3 years ago I was also hospitalized in a mental facility for 2 weeks. I have been off those medications for at least 2 years and have been fine until these past few months. Since then my sleep pattern is off and I am finding it really hard to concentrate on anything. I can't remember a conversation I had just had 1 minute prior. I try to think about things and pieces of different thoughts come together and make no sense. I don't think my psychiatrist officially stated that I have a mental illness but it does run heavily on my mothers side.
I'm scared that I might make a huge mistake in my life as a career decision and a mental health decision. If I have something I need to get it treated and the military is not the place to go.
I find it incredibly difficult to believe a military recruiter, knowing your past history and your current frame of mind, would have allowed you to make such a huge commitment.
Are you still under the care of your psychiatrist? If so, what does he/she think about this decision of yours? If you aren't still seeing them, I think it might be a very reasonable idea to meet with them and discuss this. But you state you are leaving for bootcamp in 10 days, so you have obviously signed on the dotted line. I have no idea if it's possible, at this point, to get some sort of deferral until you are feeling better. Perhaps a discussion with your recruiter is also in order.
It's also possible that you are just going through a very intense period of anxiety right now. You wondered if it could be the transition from childhood to adulthood.........Sweetie, you left "childhood" quite a few years ago, but as a YOUNG adult, you are jumping into a very, very serious GROWN UP commitment! I will assume you have only just graduated from high school. Now you are about to leave your friends, your family, your home town.............everything that is safe and familiar and go off for some really demanding, both physically and emotionally, training that may well land you in the middle of the war.
Becca, I so applaude your desire to serve your country and the courage that must take, but I really do beg you to talk to someone before you just get on that bus to wherever.
If you DO have issues to deal with, you are so right in your belief that the military, and most especially bootcamp, is the last place you want to try and get that help.
Your decision was a very brave one, but I think, if there is anyway to do it, you should postpone your enlistment.
Godspeed and peace
Greenlydia
Are you still under the care of your psychiatrist? If so, what does he/she think about this decision of yours? If you aren't still seeing them, I think it might be a very reasonable idea to meet with them and discuss this. But you state you are leaving for bootcamp in 10 days, so you have obviously signed on the dotted line. I have no idea if it's possible, at this point, to get some sort of deferral until you are feeling better. Perhaps a discussion with your recruiter is also in order.
It's also possible that you are just going through a very intense period of anxiety right now. You wondered if it could be the transition from childhood to adulthood.........Sweetie, you left "childhood" quite a few years ago, but as a YOUNG adult, you are jumping into a very, very serious GROWN UP commitment! I will assume you have only just graduated from high school. Now you are about to leave your friends, your family, your home town.............everything that is safe and familiar and go off for some really demanding, both physically and emotionally, training that may well land you in the middle of the war.
Becca, I so applaude your desire to serve your country and the courage that must take, but I really do beg you to talk to someone before you just get on that bus to wherever.
If you DO have issues to deal with, you are so right in your belief that the military, and most especially bootcamp, is the last place you want to try and get that help.
Your decision was a very brave one, but I think, if there is anyway to do it, you should postpone your enlistment.
Godspeed and peace
Greenlydia
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