Terrible Obsessive thinking

[Jeanie378]

Hi.  I am a 25 year old healthy female.  Two months ago I noticed a lump on the right side of my neck.  It seems bigger than the other lymph nodes in my neck.  I have been to three doctors, one was my GP and the other two were ENT specialists.  All of them have said they "think" that it is a normal size lymph node, but I cannot seem to be convinced.  It doesn't hurt when I touch it, but of course, that makes me worried because non tender lumps in neck are more likely to be cancerous than tender nodes.  I dont think that it is getting bigger, but it might be.  Can this be a cancerous cyst?  Could one enlarged node be a sign of something serious?  I can't stop worrying about this and it is affecting my life.  After three doctors have let me go without getting further tests I should believe them right?  This lump just does not feel "normal" to me and it is not going away.  How could I have this one large node that is always enlarged??

I have been in to se a therapist for three sessions and it has not really helped that much.  He wants to set me up with a psyciatrist to put me on some medication that might help. I am very reluctant to take any medication because I dont want it to hurt me.  I just want to start feeling more like myself and stop having these obsessive thoughts that I cannot control.  I feel like my mind is always racing!

I dont know what I am looking for.  I think I am looking for more reasurrance.   Any words that might help I would be very appreciative!  

[azqtpies]

Oh I know how you feel i find a lumo and OMG I obsess the worst thoughts I have been dealing with this bad for two months I have always been a bad worrier but this is now out of control, when I went to the dr after fighting my fear to go about 2 lumps under my arm the dr would not even feel tehm he sent me for a mammo and ultrasound instead, it all came back normal as far as they can see but wanted to a MRI and my insurance denied it! so no one every did bllod or even flet them, I still feel  them there and t hey dont feel normal to me they are small but firm , I know the us and mammo said nothing but maybe they did not even look in that part of my arm. I just found out I have a first cousin who has had breast cancer si now I am really freaked out thinking they are missing  this ! Ihate thes obessive thoughts that I too can not control.  Since it is just the one it can takes several months for them to return to normal and they say sometimes  they will go down but never return to  the previous size before the infection.. I google alot and it very bad!!! i know way too much bad information. but theat good stuff I do know, as long as they say it does not grow or get rock hard, or more show up then it is fine, and if more show up dont freal out usuallu its a bacterial, virus!... I guess I should listen to my own words!..lol I sure hope you feel better fast!

[Jeanie378]

Thanks for the comment Suzi.  I am a teacher too!

[suzi-q]

I once had a swollen node in my neck and the doctor told me it was nothing.  He said to watch it and it is probably a sign of a possible infection.  Sure enough, I got sick (what is fifths disease in children) shortly thereafter. (I am a teacher)...then when I got better, the node went back to normal size.  It was bif for at least a month or so.

A friend of mine had one also.  She watched it (as well as her doctor) for a few months.  Hers got bigger and then they removed it and biopsied it.  It was benign.  The doctors told her most of the times it is nothing and benign. So I wouldn't worry so much.  Just watch it and if it continues to get larger, maybe then have it checked.  Give it time...and remember, most of the time it is nothing to worry about.