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Morning sickness, stress, anxiety
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Morning sickness, stress, anxiety

Hi, this is my first time posting here. I am 27 years old male and I am from Canada (fr) so sorry if I make some English mistakes ;)

I was recently diagnosed with mild social anxiety and prescribed some pills for it.

The trigger that pushed me to go see a doctor is that when facing stressful events, in my case mostly for work, but previously also for school, I had/have what I now know is anxiety attacks. The first event I can remember when this occurred is while on internship, I had to present a report to high executives in a big company and just couldn't do it. I had to get up and leave to throw up. This scenario has been going on since then, this was around 3-4 years ago. While in university, I mostly had no problems except when came the oral presentation, oh god. Towards the end of my presence at the university, I wouldn't even go, I would type in my report and just never show up at the presentation. (screw that 5% if it can prevent me from throwing up, feeling utterly bad, was my thinking.) I had to quit school with 20 credits remaining out of 120 because most of the classes remaining and some huge project required oral presentations. I should mention that I also started smoking cannabis at the same time that I started university. I smoked and still smoke daily.

My first and only panic attack on cannabis:
Went to my cousin's place, I hadn't seem him in a couple of months and we smoked a huge one. Then thoughts started to run in my head. I thought he was going to kill me, the way he was talking, the words he was using, the tools that were close by etc. Finally decided I needed to live another day so I stood up and left. The following morning I was still thinking about it and it was like that for a week or so. Oh god that was scary.

The mild paranoia and lack of confidence:
When at the university, I smoked in my room and such and started getting these thoughts that I didn't want anybody to know. Also, when high, I pretty much want to hide my phone because I do not want to talk to anybody thinking they will know what is going on. Still am like that :`/

The morning sicknesses started happening during the oral presentation part of my life, as well as when I have to go see people for work, people that I want to think highly of me, respect me, etc. I would wake up around 5-6am, with bad thoughts going through my head and not wanting to leave the house that day. These days when it happens I often call in sick or work from home and just have somebody else go to that meeting, but this is killing me! I want to be able to do my job correctly. It is a job I like and I know that I am able to do that job, its just those feelings...

I have an interview for a new job tomorrow, and this morning when I woke up (it's not even today!), I had that morning sickness, it wasn't as bad as the previous ones though, but it was still there and I don't think that is normal stress. I took 1/2 pill of my prescribed ones and the day went fine, I still worked from home.

I will take 1 pill before going to sleep and 1/2 tomorrow morning if necessary (that is my prescribed dosage). I do not need to take them daily as these occurances happen only when stressful (or not for most people) events happen or will happen.

I once told my boss (he's aware of my situation and understands it) to not tell me in advance when I have meeting so that it is impossible to worry if I don't know right? Clever me. As if I am announced that I have a meeting let's say 10mins in advance, I don't have that panicky feeling.

I am starting to think its the cannabis, but I know it's going to be a difficult path for me to overcome that addiction.

This is the first time I type in the story, it actually feels good to just type it and get it out my head. If anyone has some constructive comments that could help me, it would be much appreciated.

5 Comments Post a Comment
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Avatar_f_tn
Hi, and welcome to this forum. I have heard your story many times. Some people have no problems with cannabis while others do. It can cause anxiety in some people. If you go to the top of the page and put in, bad effects from smoking pot, or something to that effect, you will see many posts like yours.
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Avatar_f_tn
Hey, I'm writing to you from across the pond (uk). I also suffer with anxiety. It's awful feeling I feel trapped like I can't go out unless I have someone with me. I used to smoke pot and suffered with panic attacks really badly once I stopped smoking the attacks became fewer and fewer till the stopped. I smoke cigarettes now and find they make my anxiety worse but I'm struggling to quit. I don't currently take anything from the doc yet, but am thinking of doing so. How are you at socialising etc does that make your anxiety bad?
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Avatar_n_tn
Hey!

If it is not for work or school and not planned I don't have a problem. I can go out with friends without a problem. I don't particularly like go out though.

As an update for my interview: I took one pill last night and a half pill this morning and everything went fine. Some sweaty palms but no tight throat or dizziness, that felt so great. I also did not smoke last night, which might have helped also!
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Avatar_n_tn
Thank you for your reply.

I searched and I'm glad to see that I am not alone in this situation.
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Avatar_f_tn
No, you're not alone. I hope you keep coming here to MH. The people are great and will give you great advice and alot of support.
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