3rd attempt going off lexapro / cipralex

[Aldal11]

I am in need of some advice or support while I attempt to go off 2.5mg of Lexapro. The first time I came off from 5mg and did a gradual decrease down to 2.5mg and stopped. I experienced withdrawals even from this small dose, dizziness, brain zaps etc. After 2 weeks I decided to go back on and experienced horrendous anxiety for nearly 2 months until the medication stabilized.

The second time I decreased very gradually until I was nearly taking the equivalent of 0.5mg, however Christmas came around and I was pregnant and homesick etc and I started suffering anxiety attacks again. My psychiatrist put me back on medication, eventually up to 20mg, and of course my anxiety was horrendous again until the medication stabalised.

I now have a 1 year old and hoping to attempt to come off medication again but of course am so scared to suffer that terrible anxiety if I relapse and being able to be a good mom if that happens.

My doctora think the dose of lexapro I'm on isn't enough to reallt treat anxiety and ocd of which I suffer, and they think it's more of a psychological disorder where the medication is a safety blanket for me. As soon as I came off the first time all I could think about was 'oh my goodness I'm off medication, something bad is going to happen' and i feel like I caused my own relapse.

I guess my question is has anyone else gone through this and successfully come off medication? And is the dose I am on really doing anything??

Thanks in advance...