Why do I question reality and normality? I'm scared.

[Banana1295]

Hi there, I'm a 22 year old female who was diagnosed with anxiety and depression at age 16. It has been up and down but this past month a huge panic attack (about the fear or death and meaning of life) sent me into a spiral. I ended up in the psychiatric ward in my town to see a psychiatrist ASAP, my anxiety and depression made me unable to go about my daily life. She put me on pills I was on before that helped a lot. So I have been on them for about 3 weeks. Pristiq 100mg.
Anyways this episode of my anxiety and depression has made me feel like I never have before. I have this false sense of reality. My body and mind feels foreign and I feel fake. It's so hard to explain and that's another reason I get so frustrated. When I talk or move sometimes I feel it's not me? Like I think about why I move or talk. I over analyze everything and I feel like I'm watching my life through a screen sometimes. I'm terrified that I'm going crazy. It's gotten to the point where living normal life doesn't feel normal at all. I'll be sitting there talking or doing something and my thoughts will go to 'you are a human, thinking, we are all humans, we will die one day' and it's terrifying.
I had never lived my life thinking about that stuff before and now it consumes me to the point where I can't recognize myself fully and people around me. I know everything Is real and this is my life and stuff.
I'm sorry this is so confusing I'm just trying to explain.
I want it to stop, I used to have episodes of depression or anxiety and it was so hard but nothing like this.
This feels like my whole world has changed and it's all in my own head and I can't escape.
I can't see my psychiatrist for another 10 days she is on holiday.
I don't know what to do and if this is normal and if it will go away.
I dread the days ahead.

Side note: I read something called depersonalization, it sounded familiar to what I'm feeling.

Someone please help, is this okay to feel? Am I going insane? Will it ever stop?

[Wobblybrains]

Hey man sorry an answer took so long but I was browsing the internet because im not feeling the greatest today either
I'll keep it short and simple and to the point
You can 100% recover from depersonalisation its your brains self defence mechanism for when things seem too scary and it needs to protect you from them
At least from what ive researched
I'll link you a few things that helped me a lot here

https://youtu.be/9WUYS6t4CCQ

This youtuber really gave me some relief he talks about his depersonalisation and how hes healing from his and getting better
He gives good tips on how you can get better too

Also

http://www.dpmanual.com

This site also gave me a lot of hope and knowledge on how to beat this
Now on the site he's selling his book but all you need to know to recover is on the actual site itself just read through and scroll to the very bottom and swipe right on the pictures at the bottom and click on the ones you want to read
Make sure you read them fully because in some it sounds scary at the start but he explains how you can get better if you keep reading

Best of luck if you havent recovered already
I know this answer is a bit late

[Wobblybrains]

One more thing you're not going insane and it will stop eventually
You're not stuck like this
Even if you need some anti anxiety meds or something it'll be okay
It may be hard but you'll get through it
It'll be a wibbly wobbly path but you'll recover stay at it