Will I ever feel "normal" again?

I have had what I have come to the conclusion is anxiety for about two years now. It started out with a few sporadic panic attacks and then I was fine for a while with just small episodes here and there. Just recently, it's gotten incredibly worse. I feel anxious everyday!!! My heart beats irregularly and fast. I tense all my muscles. I have a hard time concentrating. I have a hard time sleeping, which makes me tired all the time. I have a hard time swallowing, to the point where sometimes I actually can't. I feel like I am going to faint. I think I am going to die. I fear something horrible is going to happen. I try to concentrate on my breathing, but it only seems to make it worse!  I use to be able to walk myself out of it, but that just doesn't seem to be the case anymore. I tend to be a fairly social person, but as of late, I am becoming more and more withdrawn. I talk with my friends about it in hopes that they won't think I am crazy. The seem to be supportive, but I don't think that they can really understand the totality of what I am going through. I try to avoid things that trigger panic and live my life at the same time, but it seems as though everything seems to trigger panic at this point! Unfortunately I don't make a ton of money, nor do I have insurance. I would love to see a doctor and therapist, but financially it just seems impossible at this point. It would just be nice to have someone to talk to who understands. I fear that this is my life now forever and it's making me depressed, angry, and embarrassed. I want this to go away!!! I just want to feel "normal" again!!!

[Paulingo]

I know exactly what you are going through, and dont worry, with time it will get easier. 5 years ago I was diagnosed with Severe Anxiety Disorder, in other words I lack serontonin (serotonin is a chemical in your body that controls your central nervous system and gives you an overall feeling of well-being). I started having multiple panick attacks a day, the same syptoms (symptoms) as you, and it kept getting worse till eventually I was labelled a "hypochondriac" by most doctors in town and all my friends thought I was crazy and stopped talking to me. Many attacks were sooo bad, I'd debate on calling an ambulance or call the hospital almost every night. I thought that I was gonna die...each day that's all i could think about. People would tell me to "breathe" and it never helped, it would actually make me panic more. After a couple years of many visits to the hospital, I was finally given medication and it changed my life. It takes about 3 months to fully kick in, but I highly recommend an anti-anxiety/ and or anti-depressant. I started out with paxil, then recently switched to Celexa. Both medications have significantly helped. Im not saying that it's going to end the "attacks" all at once. It takes a long time to sort that stuff out with yourself. But medication does help, believe me. These medications help increase your serotonin levels and make you feel like a somewhat-normal human being again. Only time can truely heal the panic, and until then, you have to keep your mind occupied. Try starting a new hobby that makes you feel good and make sure you talk to your doctor about being properly medicated. I know you may be short on cash, but it's worth the money to feel sane. I hope this has helped you in some way. I truely feel for you, especially cause I have been gonig through the same thing for years...over twice as long as you..imagine that? WEll take care. Peace.

[cheshchesh819]

my heart goes out to you,but we are all here for the same reason,to talk to each other and try to help each other through these feelings as much as poss,as you said friends do listen but really dont understandwhat it is like because you cant unless you have gone through it yourself,isnt there anyone who could just help you so you could go to the doctors,i thinkit is terrible that you all have to pay for your treatment,if you ever needs to talk i am always here

[emc3]

Thank you for your kind, understanding and informative responses. It's unfortunate that any of us have to go through this, but at the same time it is very comforting to know that I am not alone. When I feel like there is no one to talk to it makes me very lonely, which really doesn't help things.
I've been skeptical about taking medications for a couple of reasons. The main, being that I once had a substance abuse problem, which was probably a big contributor to why I now have anxiety. I have taken Xanax a few times for immediate relief, but I fear having it around and becoming dependent. As far as more long term medications, I don't know a whole lot about them, except a few horror stories about people doing odd unpredictable things on them. I do take Rescue Remedy droplets, which is a natural homeopathic remedy for stress. Sometimes it helps, sometimes it doesn't!
My friends have been as supportive as I think they can be thus far. Unfortunatley I talk about it alot, due to the fact that I am always feeling it! I worry that they will eventually become sick of me! "Dude, I can't hang out with him and his ANXIETY anymore!"
This makes me sad. But NOW, I feel hopeful that I have a community that I can talk to!!! I am thankful and anxious...

[cheshchesh819]

speak to your doctor about taking medsif you are unsure i dont take any,like you i just use herbal remedies to help me,but since i have been on this site i havent had to take any,also your real friends wont get fed up of you if they ear real friends and if they do it aint a loss really because at least you know,all my friends have to listen to me all the times and not one of them have told me to shut it ,you keep talking it helps so much.

[Paulingo]

Wow we are so much alike.....I was very hesitant to go on medication too, also because of substance abuse...what do you know? lol. It's not funny but I like to add some humour. And those horror stories......there is a horror story to everything. People told me the horror stories of my meds, but I tried it out for myself and it helped me back on my feet. I started caring about myself again and I went back to work!(after being off work for years due to anxiety). Everybody is different. Do what you gotta do and message me anytime if you feel alone! Have a good day!!

[berryblend]

i almost cried when i read this. i am going threw the same thing i also have no1 2 talk 2 bc when i tried i was just called crazy..im also not on any meds or seeing a doc..my heart goes out 2 u and any1 else who is goin threw this its a horrible thing but im sry i cant give u any advise bc i cant control it either i go threw it every single day but it is a releif that im not the only person who goes threw this so maybe im not crazy

[Stananxious1986]

Dude feel the same way like my lif has become anxiety be strong my friend

[Julie359]

Hiya, just wanted to tell ya i think your making the right decison regarding being careful around taking chemical medications.  You may think these tales are horror stories but in actual fact they are part and parcel of taking drugs that alter the mind.  Every person is differnet when trying these drugs so you really can't tell how they will effect you until you try them but what i will say is that the vast majority will have both activation and discontinuation syndrome even when either introducing or reducing the drugs slowly.  I have heard more times than i have had hot meals of people having a hard time going onto or coming off these drugs and some of the symptoms are not pretty.  Look i dont want you to be scared or feel like this isn't an option for ya but i think that someone who decides, either now or in the future, to take these drugs should know.  


I was on Paxil for a total of 13yrs, had a bit of a rough time getting on it but soon settled into taking it, after a while i thought it was the best drug i had ever taken.  It stopped all the panic attacks, stopped the socal phobia, stopped the depression etc.... i felt very close to normal.  Then after 13yrs i felt well enough to come off of it.... let me tell you Paxil had been documented as one of the hardest anti-d's to come off of.  I had five months of very slowly tappering and even still has severe withdrawal.  Then once i eventually got off of it i became sick again but this time far far worse than i was before i went on it in the first place.  People are more and more commonly reporting this problem and as a result GlaxoSmithKline have been sued millions by consumers as they have played down the effects of this drug so much.  Even i am considering sueing them as for the last yr i have lived in hell and im not sure that my body will ever be the same again.  I am in the first stages with getting CT/MRI scans to detect if this drug has indeed caused changes or damage to my brain.

These people who tell these stories do not do this to scare but to inform the next person of the potential risks that they may not know about, the doc's rarely inform a perosn of them and so us as the consumer has to.

Personally if i had a second chance i would take the herbal medication route, Valerian, Passion flower, L-Theanine are a fantastic combination to take for anxiety and WILL make a difference and wont be as addicitve or addicitve as chemical drugs but for loads have the same effect. This will ease your mind as regards to addiction. Also once you get your insurance sorted get into therapy....CBT (cognitive behavioural therapy)  google and have a read up, again fantastic for anxiety and depressive disorders.  

I wish i had someone telling me this 13yrs ago just so i knew what i was letting myself in for, as i also realised that by taking a chemical drug your not actually in any way shape or form teaching yourself how to cope and overcome the anxiety your suffering, you do not learn techniques or face your problems you are chemically burying them.  I personally feel that unless you have tried ALL the other options first and they haven't worked or you are sucidial only then should someone turn to chemcial drugs as the last resort.

Take care and that rescue remedy is good but have a look at the others they are far better in relaxing you both in an emergency and over a prolonged period of time.

Peace.

[Paulingo]

Exactly why I started paxil....it was my last resort...and yes, it was a very terribly thing to get off of. But I still dont regret it. Maybe I should look into herbal medications too...

[9DodgeFan]

Hi!  This is a great place to talk to people about anxiety, where you know others are going through the same thing.  Your friends may be sympathetic toward you, but like you said, if they haven't gone through it, there's really no way for them to truly understand it.  With that said, try not to worry about what they think; if they're true friends, they'll stick by you through thick & thin!  And don't be afraid to post here anytime you need to; I think you'll find everyone here is very supportive, and many people are dealing/have dealt with the exact same issues.
However, I do think you need some additional help.  At this point it sounds like anxiety is really controlling your life, and there's only so much we and/or your friends can do.  I know you said $$ is tight, but you really should see a psychiatrist about this.  Also, I know some people are hesitant about medicines, but they [the medicines] are there to help!  And believe me, I know about side effects and so on; when my anxiety was bad, I actually expected the side effects, rather than the benefits!  So, I guess in conclusion, we are here to help and support you as much as we can, but you really should see a professional to have the best shot at getting your life back to normal.  But please don't be a stranger here!   :-)

[kevintool]

Stay strong!  I have to tell myself that all the time.  Medications really helped me.  I have been anxious most of my adult life, and had a terrible time sleeping all through college and graduate school.  I was okay for a while but then after my beautiful daughter was born for some reason I got really anxious.  Went back to law school, got really anxious, and eventually started having full panic attacks.  I had all sorts of physical symptoms before that, leading up to Crohns (I know stress does not really cause it, so they say, but there is a connection).

After suffering for several months without sleep having panic attacks, and trying different meds, I found a tricyclic amine type drug and occasional XR xanax.  It has really helped.

My only problem is times like now for instance when I get to feeling good and then try and go off the meds and then feel anxious again.The good news for me is that it gets better.  For all I know, I may have to stay on meds forever.  That's fine with me.  It is a real condition and you need help, as we all do.

I would recommend therapy at the same time with a good counselor.  Finally, it helps to talk to others who know what you are going through.  I also find it helpful to look at successful folks who suffer from similar issues.  Read Howie Mandel's "Here's the Deal:  Don't Touch Me."  It gives me some hope.

Hang in there.  There is hope!

kevintool

[Julie359]

Hiya Paulingo, you said that Paxil was a last resort for you but then stated that maybe you should have a look into Herbal medicines too.  This would imply that if indeed Paxil was a last resort for you, then you would have tried every herbal medicine or other alternative therapy in the book. If a chemical drug is actually a last resort for someone they would of tried every single avenue before trying it.  

Other avenues will include treatments such as Acupuncture, Acupressure, Reflexology, Macrobiotic Diet, Meditation, Yoga, Hypnotherapy, Massage, colonic Hydrotherapy Nutrition,  Aromatherapy, Chinese Herbal Medicine...... to name but a few.  We seem to totally forget that there are all these different options available to us.  We think the only way is by taking Western medicine.  You know it isn’t our faults though because our family doctors, shrinks etc, have, in a sense, brain washed us into thinking that the ONLY way is to take their drugs that nothing else will help.   You know that drug companies such as GlaxoSmithKline are making trillions out of our misery, only for their drugs to cause more misery for many.

Kevintool.... I think it's very sad that you feel you have no choice but to stay on these drugs all your life.  You really shouldn't feel like you don't have any other options, because you really do!!!!  You DONT have to take these drugs forever, just explore the world of alternative medicine and see what works best for you.  

I am currently trying a combination of therapies; Hypnotherapy, meditation, exposure CBT and herbal medicine.  Yes it's far more work than just popping a pill once a day in my mouth but i'll tell ya this, through putting in all this hard work in the end i will be far more better off cause i would of dealt with all those problems that is keeping the anxiety alive inside me, chemically it was just being buried, i will learn how to control and manage the anxiety, which will make me a far far stronger person who knows and understands myself far better, i will not have all those unwanted side effects and my knowledge can never run out...... once it's there it's there for life.

I just want you guys to look at the situation from a different angle and see you can do this a different way.... Google, read and research it can't harm you and you never know what you may find, you may find that 'something' that totally changes your life!!!!!!

[kevintool]

You are right.  I will (and do) keep an open mind.  I am in therapy and am meditating every day.  I just take things one day at a time.

We should all keep an open mind.  But above all, I hope we can support each other.  One of the things that helps me the most is to know I am not alone.

Thanks!

kevintool

[Julie359]

Hey.... :0) Its great your meditating and having therapy, i really hope they help in your recovery and lead to a drug free life.  We can do this!! I'm just soooo fed up now of having this label and wasting my life on this illness i just want to break free and start doing the things i wana do, instead of being controlled by fear.

Ive just started to introduce the Macrobiotic diet into my lifestyle, i've read up on it and it can be a very powerful tool in healing both your mind and body and getting rid of all the toxins that are overtaking our bodies. It's gona be hard not eating all my fav comfort foods, like cake and chocolate but hey...if it gives me healing and my life back then so be it.  Ive ordered Marcobiotic cookbooks and am already trying some online recipes.....

Take care and hope to chat to ya more often.... x

[emc3]

It may sound crazy, but just hearing your stories makes me feel safe. Today I feel a bit less anxious than I usually do... I hope the entire day feels this way.
Thanks. everyone!!!

[9DodgeFan]

Don't worry, it doesn't sound crazy!  I believe feeling alone can help contribute to anxiety.  When you know other people have experienced what you're going through and have it under control (rather than it controlling you), it is a huge confidence boost!  I think that's why it would be a good idea to look into a therapist; I guess I didn't mention that in my previous post.  I do believe medicine can be helpful, but I certainly didn't want to give the impression it's the only way to go.  You may find some things work better for you than others; once you find what really helps you, you'll be able to build on that and get back to your "real" life!

[emc3]

I most definitely want to start seeing a therapist. I can't really afford it, so I have been looking into therapist that work on a sliding scale.
I am leaving town for about a month, but when I return I will be more proactive about the whole therapist thing! Thank you!

[barbie2359]

Hi I am 28 yrs old with three kids. I wish i would have know you all about 4yrs ago when I was going through  this stage of panic attacks and anxiety. I Got through this through GOD I changed my of thinking and thought positive and did positive things. I have my panic attacks evey now and then but I think i trigger them by thinking of dying are thinking something bad is going to happen but for the most part i keep myself busy and active with my kids and I also drink herbal things for anxiety I stay away from prescription drugs because I was on drugs before and I do not want to come dependent on them. In time you learn how to deal with it. I hope everyone gets  better in due time and GOD BLESS everyone

[adam2272]

So I've been dealing with this now for a few years. I get to the point where I wake up with full blown anxiety, until I fall asleep. The biggest thing now is my cognitive abibility and confusion. I feel like i am stupid. I can't commuicate with people without getting paninky and weak. I just started Klonopin .5mg and wanted to know if anyone had tried this route and could this be contributing to my memory loss or will it get better maybe?

[MartineMoreau]

Yes, you can feel back like your old self again but you'll always have anxiety lingering you just need to learn your symptomes and accept them as anxiety. Seems simple in words but I know it isn't. I've taken meds for 3 days to help me over a hump cause I was getting so bad I couldn't do my job I was so focused on my symptomes and thinking I was going to die at everyone. I've went to the ER and had a multitude of tests done. Each normal results helped me a bit but I still would question the results. Writing on here was a therapy in itself, knowing I wasn't alone helped some days I wrote everyday just to get that comfort. I would also talk about this to my spouse and my parents, there were there for me but no one really understood me and how I felt. I had to tell them what I needed from them. But it is hard for them too cause all they hear is the same thing over and over. There are crisis lines available (I'm in Canada and there is a Crisis line number I'd have to find it if you are Canadian) and help groups.

Here is what helped me. I'm not fully out of the woods but really close and I did it without meds, except for that 3 days. I stopped cause I didn't like the side effects and was afraid of the dependance it could do.

Looking on the internet I found the ONE MOVE TECHNIQUE from Joe Barry, it's expensive but helpful, if you don't have money they have a free news letter that is a bit less detailed then the book but is super helpful. The news letter was my first step.

Then I found tapping. It's a technique where you tap accupunture spots with a phrase and it helps realine your energy levels. It's long and repetitive, I didn't find much help but it's a great distraction when your having a panic attack, helps them go away.

Then I've never been super religious but I found this great old book with lots of prayers to help with different things and one was for anxiety. I would say this prayer morning and night and whenever I felt panicky. It helped me loads.

I've also seen a therapist just talking helped me realise some bottled up things I had. Not only did it help deal with anxiety but it helped me deal with other things as well.

Hang in there look on the internet there are lots of help out there.

[bbycrissy]

Hey all =]
my heart goes out to all of you because we are all battling this monster together!
Ive had anxiety for about 2 years now and from the day I was diagnosed its only gotten better, which im very thankful for.
But of course, it took alot of hardword and mind over matter type of stuff.
When I was first diagnosed, I kept going to the docter for a solution, and they were really quick to throw meds at me. Which of course thats how they make there money.
personally, ive never been a fan, of taking medicine or anything but at this point I was severly depressed and anxious since I went from being a very out going sociable person to being cooped up in my room, terrified of even going down the street to the store in fear of having anuther panic attack.
So i finally caved in, decided to take cimbalta, the symptoms were too much to take. So my docter gave my lexapro, which only made me feel like a zombie.
I was losing hope, thought my life was guna end until one day I decided to do some research for natural anxiety and depression supplements.
Then I came across this website www.amoryn.com I read everything on the website because I was skeptical of course but hey I had nothing else to lose, I ordered amoryn. which is an all natural anti anxiety/depression pill made with natural ingrediants, Hyperforin
, 5-HTP, Rhodiola Rosea, B vitamins, selenium, vitamin d3, zinc, vitamin c. thats everything that is in this pill. you can even go to the website urself and read what it has to say.
so I recieved it finally, started taking it. I got NO SYMPTOMS. and as the days started passing, I started to feel much bette! my depression was going awayy and I started to feel more like myself. =D I was so thankful for coming across this website, because I think it turelly saved my life.
now that the depression went away, I still dealt with panic attacks frequently, so I looked at this other all natural supplement that they also carry called SEREDYN.
seredyn is made to stop panic attacks rite as your getting one.
when you start to get that racing heartbeat, take one, and it IMMEDIATLY calms you down and gives you a sense of tranquility and control.
it also prevents you from having any. Thats why id take one in the morning before I left the house, or id just take one when I felt panicked =].
seredyn contains, L-Theanine, Passion Flower, Valerian, Niacinamide, and Magnesium Taurinate. al these are natural herbal ingrediants tht work amazing together to calm you down =D
the cost is about $20 dollers or so for amoryn, and about $30 dollers if you buy it on amazon.com
what ever the price may be, trust me. ITS WORTH EVERY PENNY!
with thecombination of these two amazing supplements, I was able to get my life back!
dont get me wrong, I still have my ups and downs with anxiety, but I think thats just life and its normal lol.
well If you acually took the time to read this, thanks for listening and I hope you give these a try, because they worked for me, so im pretty sure that they will work for you aswell =]]

best of luck to everyone<3

[bbycrissy]

sorry lol I made a typo.
The seredyn is about $30 dollers on amazon.
oh and I forgawt to mention that there are no withdrawl (withdrawal) symptoms if you decide to stop taking them.
non-addictive.
I need to buy more seredyn, since im starting college again in fall lol

[Cory100]

My anxiety i had since grade 8... now i am 23 i controlled the attacks but i feel like my breathing is all out of wack i feel like i am gonna die each day i wake up nothing but having negative thoughts go threw my mind its hard to get a job to make new friend. I am blessed that i have my gf  to some what support me but she will never know what i  am going through i just feel like i breath bad now cause i think i have lung cancer or sum **** i never smoked day in my life and i am active.... Anxiety ***** 12 years of anxiety stress and i am a hypochondriac fun stuff always thinking i have illness so what i am trying to say does anyone feel like there breathing is very shallow and ***** always without the attack.?

[momnursesisterwife]

Your prognosis for recovery (without medication) is excellent with the right treatment.  A good therapist, the right diet and exercise (of course) and learning the right skills to deal with your anxiety and depression.  I had lived with this for years and had read countless self help books about anxiety and depression.  The key to unlocking the mystery of why this is happening to me and how do I rid myself of it came from a austrlan psychiatrist named Claire Weekes, nominiated for a nobel prize for her work.  Get her used audio cd on panic/anxiety for $10 on amazon.com.  This is where all treatment for this condition should begin!

[steveB78]

I to suffer from general anxiety disorder, social anxiety disorder and adult ADD, it's been a rough go but im doin it i think. Most of my so called friends have basically moved on and at this time i seriously have not one friend. Over the years my issues have just gotten worse i dont trust anyone anymore, i think people are out to do harm to me at what ever cause, i have become super paranoid and think the world is against. I truly feel that my life is worthless and that im wasting a good body that a normal person could use. I do see a physc and do take meds but i dont think they help at all. End conclusion i believe all i got is myself to remedy this stuff and what iv found myself doing is hermiting and never leaving my house. its definately sad to know that theres a whole world out there enjoying life with there friends but for me its easier to just confine myself permantely things are just easier this way i guess.   THE SAD MAN

[ehardy19]

hope you found the help you need i been dealing with the same thing for 4 months has put me out of work so that cause more stress on me like you i dont make much but u should try to get madicaid and get with a health program . because u do need extra help in order for you to get your life back . my doctor as put me on Propranolol 10mg . am just starting it so am hoping when i get back to work which is very soon that i wont be sent home again cause its been hard . I hope things are working out for you .GOOD LUCK TO BETTER HEALTH

[andrelle]

reading your story sounds like it came directly from my life. i was taking 40mg of prozac and doing great. one day i get a wild hair and decide that i didnt need meds anymore. WRONG ANSWER!. i relapsed and had a bad panic attack. i went running back to my doctor for the prozac. i had been off for 5 months so now i am going through the process of allowing it to build up in my system again. i am on week 3 and feel a little better not 100%. trust me that will never happen again.

[marshallD]

im so glad i found this blog. i have recently started having majour panic attacks. ive always worked out. well, i started having chest tightness while running on the tredmill. my doctor says its just my panic disorder. but now everytime i get on the tredmill my chest gets tight..for hours after. because i think about it and hence it makes me feel anxioius. i just started paxil 1 week ago. it seems a little better. how long will it take for my meds to completely kick in? and do you have palpitations and chest tightness too? or perhaps pain in your jaws and shoulders from being so tense?

[sr2012]

Hi there, I have had anxiety issues because of bipolar disorder type 2 for 10 years. I am finally getting out of it. It's actually nothing major, though of course for whoever is going through it things seem very painful and scary, I've been there.

Basically, all of us have normal anxiety responses. Like after a car accident, we can somehow seem to be very "clear" about things, or if a simple thing like some drunk people at your street corner shouting at you, you walk a little faster or run.

Anxiety disorder happens when this is CONSTANT. Like, no matter where you go, you cannot turn down the volume on your sensations of the "fight flight or freeze" response.

A psychologist and psychiatrist can help. Yes, it takes time, in my case 10 years. But now I know if I panic (it may not leave you, because if you never have anxiety then you're a zombie, which is not cool unless you really enjoy it (eg. meditative states or so on) ... in any case, I know if I panic, I give myself 2 hours to get through the situation then evaluate. If things calm down, then good. If not, I take my short-term medication, which I only needed to once in the past 3 weeks. I am still on longer-term medication.

All I can say is that it can get better. If our chemistry is such that we need to be on medication, that's just the way it is ~ if someone was proven to have diabetes, would you ask them to stop all their treatment?

[sr2012]

Of course besides medication psychologists and reading about this kind of stuff can help one understand ~why~ the anxiety is there. The key is to find good treatment and one where you feel you are benefitting.

[sr2012]

Yes, I use to have this really weird panic attacks at first, where I would be in a car on the freeway where my friend was driving me somewhere, or on a ferry across the river, and have this sensation that I suddenly am going to pee and there's no way I can hold it, I'm going to embarass myself and lose my friends. Or I suddenly feel I'm going to go "full on crazy" and start shouting or hitting people or running onto traffic. That's anxiety, it's fear of more anxiety, not always fear of something existing. Physical symptoms I feel can emerge from some underlying stress or physical/ mental/ emotional trauma that is building up and we're not aware of it. All the best. I think you will have to give it a few months. Medication can be helpful but also a psychologist can help see if there are any other areas of your life which need to be looked at. Did you move recently, have a new job, start or end a relationship, be involved in different, more or less physical activity? For example...

[russdaboss]

About 3 months ago I started to have a “Numb” feeling starting in my legs, a bit like pins n needles and it would go straight up my body. Didn’t think much of it as it would only last a few seconds. I then started to get sweaty palms and fingers and pins n needles in random places of my body.
All very weird so went to docs and they straight away said “anxiety attacks” and sent me away not doing anything. It then got a lot worse and I became an insomniac and just couldn’t sleep for weeks. Eventually after taking all sorts of sleeping pills etc the doctor gave me mirtazpine which is like a mild sedative and helps with anxiety. I have been on these for a couple of months and they have really helped with my sleeping. I am on just 15mg a night and it relaxes you so much that you sleep well and feel great in the morning. I still feel odd at work and get pins n needles and sometimes get a kind of like a weird “wavey” feeling in my head, bit like a rush from a ciggerette is what I can describe it best!
My question is, I have had no stress or unhappiness in my life recently yet I now have this aniexty disorder, how is this possible!? I still think I have a virus or something. Sometimes I find myself just sitting starring into space not knowing who or what I am! Freaky hey. Has anyone experienced what I am going through as its really really getting on top of me now so any advice would be great.

[bigdinero]

Have you had western blot test for Lyme and co-infections?  Bartonella (one of the co-infections) is known to cause anxiety and lyme could cause this as well.  Something to consider - most general practitioners are not well versed in lyme and view it only as fatigue and joint pain.  

I have some bad anxiety and tested positive for lyme.  Although hard to say if it is the lyme that is causing it / magnifying it or two separate conditions.  Fun times.  Good luck.

[nnovella]

Alright, I am typing on my iPhone, so I don't know how much longer I'll be able to do this. I'll try to get out what I have to say though.
I'm 18 year old male.
Personal experience. About 4 months ago, I was experimenting and trying out the whole weed thing. After all, it is referenced in soo many songs and people say it is safe and should be legalized.
So I tried some weed before bed. I thought it would help. I took a hit, and waited a little tiny bit, and took another. I kept taking hits thinking I wasn't feeling much. I lost all care for past and future and was in the moment soo much. I found myself in front of the bathroom mirror starting into my own eyes. It went on for a little while. It was as if I came-to in front of the mirror. I forgot I even smoked anything. I wanted to move but couldnt. The feeling of having a smile went to a feeling of a big frowning sad face but my face looked stagnant in the reflection. a blank stare. this scared me. I wanted to move my position. one of the most important things is how my vision wasn't smooth, even for staring straight into my own eyes, my field of view was jerky. it was twitching back onto itself as if space and time were dividing or multiplying. it felt like I was in straight up HELL, and I was relieved to know I was asleep having a nightmare. so I tried to wake up and couldn't seem to. my fear level doubles. I realize it is a real experience. I swear that I died and was stuck in the underworld. It sucked because as I looked at myself, there was some detachment in recognizing it was me. I finally move my position and it is hard to breathe. All the while, worst experience ever. I hated the frame rates that were too low. like taking pictures and playing back action instead of using a video camera. anyways.
I woke up feeling different. Thinking about how I felt the tingling/bubbling in my brain the night before, and how many hits I took, I knew I screwed up and fried myself. I permanently fried my brains. this turned me into a disaster case. I was freaking out inside. Why me? Why me? I would cry I would get mad. Then I would deny it and say to myself that i was overreacting. So that morning I found myself in the laundry room and as I was folding dry towels, it came over me for no reason: I felt tightness in my chest, shaking/shivering all over, hard to breathe or no breathing at all, uneasy feeling like when I was in front of the mirror, and my vision went to the low frame-rates. I was basically high again and I wanted to die. It faded away after about 60 long seconds. and I would find that these 'attacks' would come over me over the next 2 or 3 months. and each time they happen, I would get paranoid as if I were high. come up with stupid things to scare myself about. The DEREALIZATION was very real to me and I wanted to know how long it would last and how to get rid of it. I didnt like my new perspective on life on earth and the feeling inside that I had when inwas a young boy. childhood. or maybe it is the feeling I got while dreaming and reminiscing about childhood memories. Surprisingly, feeling like that felt like poop to me. I just wanted to feel "normal" again.
Do you feel like you snap back to reality while watchin tv? Staring into a photo that means a lot to you? That's because in those moments, your mind is off of the subject. for once! YOU NEED TO STOP THINKING ABOUT YOUR CURRENT DILEMMA. NOT JUST STOP THINKING ABOUT THE DEREALIZATION, but, STOP THINKING ABOUT NOT THINKING ABOUT DEREALIZATION.  okay? I know it's hard. and you will get good at it. you will come back to "reality" slowly. (2-3 days? a week?) and your mind will be soo tired of over thinking it all, it will feel nice to finally relax, and stop feelin bad for yourself. Maybe think about other people and how they feel.  Be selfless. Get your mind off of it. Pick up a new hobby or something. I remember it could be difficult to do normal tasks. Driving was weird, and working on the computer was weird, too. Living seemed outrageous. On top of it all I was afraid I was turning schizophrenic from weed. and my biological father is a loony tune so I felt screwed. a disgusting twist of fate. and that fortune cookie that said dont go down that path unless you are ready for a change in life. I WOULDN'T WISH THE WHOLE ORDEAL ON MY WORST ENEMY. worst thing ever. Anyways, weed is a pshycho-active drug. meaning it can make your brain active making you think many thoughts. your mind might not have ever been put into that set before so even after the smoking session, your brain knows how to think too many thoughts and get caught up on some of them. ANYWAYS, I know you never saw it coming. I know you never imagined life could be soo weird and the brain soo complex. I know you are scared for your well-being. HERE'S what tells you that you're not crazy. You are aware what being normal is too well. it is what you have your mind set on—being normal again. You don't see things hear things.. you are a SANE human being with full potential to live a purposeful life. Just move on and start "looking back" on your experience and find meaning in it. maybe you learned a lesson. maybe you will be more compassionate and live life to the fullest now. find your reason. EVERYTHING HAPPENS FOR A REASON. I think earth is where we learn important lessons that are useful for being a stronger spirit. Maybe pray to God. Find a faith? the point is to get your mind off of it and doing one of those things, you will be putting a lot of your stress and worry into gods hands. MAYBE your lesson will be to develop your own set of skills to get yourself 'out' of the DEREALIZATION. don't just give up and sit there staring at something admiring how fake and dreamlike it appears, snap out of it. might as well not ge USED TO it, or it might be harder to convince yourself that you can return to 'reality'. that feeling you get when you are home but it actually feels like HOME. very personal and real and cozy and safe. YOU WILL FIND YOURSELF SOO HAPPY SOMEDAY SOON. I mean, it will lift off of you and it will be soo overwhelmingly strong that there is no doubt in my mind that you will cry. Your tears will be happy and sad and you will get the strongest emotion of relief, with a tiny sprinkle of anger. Happiness, though, is where you will be at then. Just don't scare yourself. Not worth the energy. panick attacks are VERY scary and confusing. They will go away if you find yourself in the middle of one and stand up for yourself and act like everything is normal. breathe. pretend you aren't having one. you will see it will last much less time than normal. soon, you won't get them anymore. you may even feel a panic attack coming over you but then change your mind and decide not to have it. be like "no, not now! I'm with my friends having dinner, really? not now!" and if you are good at it, it will have dissipated. Writing this was difficult because I am soo past that. hated the feelings. and don't like thinkin about it. but doing this helps me stay strong. OH, and smile. even if it feels stupid. mental patients were discharged after being told to smile. they became well. I haven't looked it up; someone told me about it. but it's true. HEY, good luck! you can do it!

n h n m a i l @ y a h o o . c o m

[LoSTandScArEd25]

my anxiety is a HUGE issue in my life also,but for me to feel normal I am on 40 mgs of Valium a day which in itself causes a huge problem because it causes me NOT to feel in a way...... emotions disappear and sometimes sexual desire does too.......just be careful what meds you and your doc put you on.

[GingaNinja81]

Hi Russ,

Believe it or not..the anxiety symptoms can often come from things that aren't stressful so much as there is alot.  Alot of life.  So, if you are thinking about walking the dog, putting out food for dinner, the bills you haven't paid, getting your car fixed, a bad day at work....too many of these little stresses eventually turn into one big one.  It doesn't need to be anything overly bad or even traumatic to have anxiety, but just an overactive mind (or as others have mentioned missing things in your body).  It is unusual for it to start as just numbness and pins and needles.  That is usually a much more advanced panic symptom.

[GingaNinja81]

This is great, thank you guys.  It gets worse during different periods,but so great to see that others go through it.  It is terrible because you feel crazy and it takes over your life.  You feel silly and selfish, yet don't know how to fix it.  I appreciate this so much and all the helpful advice

[GingaNinja81]

Haha.  Moving countries, ending a new relationship, starting a new job, losing finances, and living alone....guess it's not that weird to be feeling as nuts as I do at times. :)

[BabyRican09]

Im only 16 nd im goimg throught that:-(sometime i get scared to give up on life its so bad:-( pliss help me

[lovvorn86]

I fought with anxiety and depression myself and Im like u I dont have a ton of money or insurance so what I done was found my local mental center snd they helped me I got free service and they helped me with my meds where I could afford them at the most I paid for my meds was 18 dollars a month try that and c what u can do

[lovvorn86]

I fought with anxiety and depression myself and Im like u I dont have a ton of money or insurance so what I done was found my local mental center snd they helped me I got free service and they helped me with my meds where I could afford them at the most I paid for my meds was 18 dollars a month try that and c what u can do

[kirtyleigh]

Julie i totally agree with you!

[Mannyx12]

I feel less depressed when I saw dis posts I thought I was the only one I felt horrible everyday I can't stop thinking of bad things and my death I just want to be normal again I wanna feel joy and happy every single day and I wanna do alot of things I never done iam tired of living like dis feeling pain,scared,and I want to stop panicking everytime I think about death and worrying  

[sugarbooger20]

I am completely on the same page as everyone else here.  I just started having these "anxiety" attacks in December.  I was at work when the first one occurred and ended up being taken to the hospital by ambulance because I didn't know what was happening.  It felt like something something really bad was going to happen right then.  All in all, I ended up taking 75mg Effexor XR once daily and 5 my Cloneazapam twice daily. This took care of the anxiety immediately and instead of waiting for the next attack to happen, I was able to start planning my life again.  I will also tell you that a huge help is talking to a Psychologist.  I am fortunate enough that my employer is accommodating what is happening to me and my needs to take care of this.  It is truly debilitating and I judged everyone until it happened to me.  Take about walking a mile in someone else's shoes.  Huge awakening but in talking with my Dr, this may not be a life long disorder.  It's a change in lifestyle to remove the triggers.   We are all here to help one another so it is great to see this string continue.

[rose042789]

Hi everyone, first I want to say it is so great to see everyone being so supportive on this site. I'm new to this so bear with me please. Heres my story and concerns that maybe someone can help with. Last month I was driving to a wedding with my mom in the passenger seat. The whole day I was fine, I ate good, did my hair, got my makeup done, and got dressed for the wedding. The whole time I was driving, I kept feeling shortness of breath and irregular breathing. I tried to just calm myself down. I started getting scared so I pulled over. Instead of calming down things got worse. I felt this heaviness in my chest and stomach. Then my entire body went completely numb and very tingly, to the point where I couldn't open my hands or move my feet. I panicked and had my mom call 911. They told me it was just a panic attack and basically just had me sit there til I was relaxed again. Nothing major happened to me prior to this, just the usual stress from work school family, etc..It has been 3 weeks since then and everyday I feel scared. If I feel like my heart is beating fast or my breathing is irregular, I start to feel scared and panicky. I usually just take deep breaths and walk around to calm myself down. Im absolutely terrified that I will be this way forever now. I know its normal to be scared after a panic attack, but I just hope this goes away. Ive been scared to drive or go out ever since then too. I still drive and go out when needed, but I cant seem to shake this feeling of worry. Any tips for a first time panic attack? How long is it normal to be scared after having my first panic attack? I refuse to take medications or be diagnosed with anything, Im hoping my feeling are just a funk and are a result of being hospitalized. Any comments or advice would greatly help?

[nattopping]

i havent commented before but i had to reply. I'm so glad i read your post, i have been on and off anti depressants a few times but just after christmas last year i was put on anti anxiety medication, after i had my baby, it didnt help and i stopped taking it, but it seems to have made everything worse. It is ruining my life. im going to take your advice. im going to go alternative