confused,sad,angry,panicky,all in one

[magen7984]

Hi guys! i dont know what to do. I am so sad mad confused and of course full of panic. I havent been happy for the past week. There are some major issues going on in my life right now, for ex: my baby sis who is only 16 is totally going down hill drinking doing drugs. I know she is going to turn out to have overwelming panic like me! I blame my parents. I believe i have this anxiety because of them! I grew up with nothing. My parents addicted to drugs my constant beatings  from my father i just grew up always on edge. For the past 3-4 years the panic has been so much worse. My sis does the things she does to get away for it but i sooo much want her to be happy! Ex:2 i feel like my relationship is going down hill. We never talk well i do he dosent i know he is having some depression but you know how some guys are dont express then selves! I just fell such overwelming dread. I just wish everything was ok again! no more panic! It really does take alot out of you i just want ot be happy again!! I am not really depressed most of the time but there is only sooo much we can handle. sorry for rambling but thats waht you guys are here for :) i just needed to vent my emotions. Why did god pick us to feel such agony?? Everthing happens for reasons but enough is enough. I would do anything for non of us too fell this way but sorry so much for you guys to read! ne way thanks for everyting all you guys say and do i believe tomorrow will be a better day!  

[fluffyrabbits]

like they say, you can never know good without knowing evil. I HATE all this panic stuff, it DOES take the world out of you, but I'll admit that it makes me appreciate every little droplet of happiness a BILLION times more than other people probably do. I dont mind reading long entries, I'm always writing them too, its nice to be able to vent and know that for once people aren't saying you're crazy or to just "stop it already".  I know I dont have the same problems as you, but believe me when I say I know exactly where you're coming from. When you feel like EVERY TIME you finally find the strength to stand back up... someone comes and rips the carpet right out from under you, and there you right back at square one. for the millionth time. it gets to people. I've been dealing with a lot the last year or two also. I've moved across the country 4 times, but I've lived in 7 different places in that time also. I've gotten married and divorced and engaged again. I've dealt with a husband in Iraq, and now a fiance in Iraq, I've had falling outs with some of my closest friends, I was almost homeless for a little bit, every time I thought I'd be able to stand on my own, someone stole my stuff or stole my money or tried to ruin my relationships or just something. always something. on top of all that, now I'm dealing with all this anxiety and panic and takes so much out of you. I've found two things that sometimes help me: 1.) either do a million things and stay busy. this causes you to be energetic and move around, which is like exercise which increases the happiness and blah blah blha, and also gives you the feeling of accomplishing something and takes your mind off of your problems so your brain gets a break from all the thinking. 2.) sometimes it can be nice to do the opposite thing. Just to sit somewhere alone with no distractions and no sound or anything at all, and just lay there and breathe and just "be" i guess. being outside or at a park or something is always nice. Just remember that "this too shall pass". not everything can always suck, somethings have to go right somewhere. Good luck with your relationship and your sister. I hope everything will work out in the end :) Just keep your head up high!!

[suzi-q]

Well, it is obvious that you have true reasons to feel panicky and I give you a lot of credit and commend you on being so strong...You have been through a lot and i truly wish you peace of mind..you deserve it.  do something special for YOU today.  And...just for today...don't think of anyone else...just YOU!

[Marsha78951]

I totally agree with you on these feelings.  They suck really bad.  I've had Generalized Anxiety Disorder and depression for years and right now I am really struggling with it almost worse than ever now it feels like.  Somedays it is almost impossible to function, I am always so on-edge and panicky about everything.  I worry nonstop and then I get really depressed.  Everything you wrote I could completly relate to.  At least someone knows what it's like!  No else around me seems to understand any of this craziness I have to deal with and it really sucks.  I just wish I could take it out and give it to them for a while just to show them what it is like to live with this.  Although lately it's not even living it is just surviving, everyday is a struggle.  Just know that I totally understand what your'e going through and hopefully there will be relief for all of us soon.