Moody!

[KayD12]

I was diagnosed with BP when I was about 17 or 18. But I think it may be something a little more then just BP. I can't say that I have done my research and learned about this disorder, but I do need to know more. Any help would be appreciated. My boyfriend thinks I'm crazy & does not know how to help me deal. I'm in a constant mood swing. Anxiety. I get so angry for no reason and will cry at the drop of a dime. Sometimes even when I'm not alone I feel alone. Because no one around me ever knows whats going on in my head but me. I feel meaningless and hopeless when I know my family,friends and boyfriend all love me and care about me. I get very paranoid. My self of esteem is lower then ever. I just don't feel like myself anymore. I'm so afraid of this ruining my relationship with my boyfriend [of 6 years]. I don't think I could hold it in my conscience that it was all my fault. I blame myself for everything already. I've tried medications like effexor and cymbalta. But I quit taking it because it made me sick. I just don't know how to get through day by day anymore. I need help. I'm not one to ask for it. But I have to find out more and learn more on how to deal with this. Please help.

[KayD12]

Hmm....Tried that before & they told me that I make to much. I work at KFC!!! How much is too much? B,c it does not even pay all the bills! Got to love Michigan.< [Just to make a joke about it] I talked to my mother, we are going to look for a good psychiatrist near by. Maybe one that can tell me why I FREAK OUT SO MUCH!

[ILADVOCATE]

You should be eligible for Medicaid or if you are working and this exists in your state (most states have it) the Medicaid Buy in for Working People with Disabilities. You could find out more at your local independent living center. Here's a list:
http://www.ilru.org/html/publications/directory/index.html
There's one in every county of every state.

[KayD12]

I've thought about going and talking to a psychiatrist, but no health insurance kind of kicks that one in the butt. I am very strong willed I want to tackle this without to many pills to take everyday. I don't even take Tylenol or anything for headaches.

[Narnia41]

I totally agree with ILADVOCATE. I was taking Cymbalta too, it made me very sick and induced mania and mixed states.  I still take it, but with a mood stabilizer added.  If you have BP then you need a mood stabilizer too.

Are you under the care of a Psychiatrist?  You really should go for help even though you don't like to ask for it.  Research has proved that the course of the illness only progresses without proper treatment.  Don't be afraid to ask for help, we've all been there!

Also, I urge you to read as much as you can about BP, there is alot of good advice and information on the net and the more you educate yourself, the better equipped you are to deal with the illness.  

[ILADVOCATE]

What you were taking were anti-depressents. Anti-depressents alone cannot treat bipolar and can sometimes induce mania. Full mood stabilizers are needed. Only a psychiatrist could make an exact diagnosis but keep a Mood Tracker here and bring the results to a psychiatrist as then they could make a more conclusive diagnosis.