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11 year old won't listen/not focused
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11 year old won't listen/not focused

I read the two comments and yes, those children sound so much like mine.  "Doing homework with your child for 3-4 hours only to find out that this was somebody else's homework" - I know this so well.  School years have been insane for me from the very beginning.  Not listening to teachers, not paying attention, not knowing what was taught in school, not writing her homework down, not doing her homework, not doing it right, I am just losing my mind trying to cope with all this.  I am asking myself, what is even the point of continiuing with this school education, if all homework and other work (whatever she doesn't do in class because ... she just stares or does nothing) I have to make her do at home... It is like a war.. Pleading doesn't get through, kind asking doesn't either, praise-no effect, and the  work just piles up and nothing is done by the child- it's actually me making her do the homework the right way.  The worst thing is, she doesn't understand what she doesn't understand - I tell her, if you do not understand anything - don't do it - let me know- After that, she will do every problem from math homework from a subject she knows nothing about.  She just doesn't get it.  She tells me "I thought I knew that".   School only matters as long as she meets her friends there - education-wise - she doesn't understand about studying.  I don't know how much longer I can go on. Nothing works and teachers just complain to me over and over.  And I am helpless because I cannot change or improve anything.  She becomes all awake whe she meets her friends, when she talks to them.  She just doesn't care about studying or solving any problems, or doing homework -or anything- in order, neatly, she doesn't care about tests.  I cannot believe any more whatever she says - it is mostly a lie.  She is unable to study on her own: I teach her - read the lesson and then answer questions.  She'll say she's done.  But if I check on her- it turns out she cannot answer any questions.  I have to do everything with her.  I cannot focus on my work because of this craziness at home.  Reminding once, twice, ten times doesn't work.  Nothing works except when I yell and then still I have to guide he step by step through everything.  I don't even know if there is any way out of it.  She was tested and not diagnosed with anything - they said she's bright.  SO what is it : is she lazy, has no respect for school and her parents, just doesn't give a damn.  On the other hand, she is a quiet, smiling child, never any tantrums or anything.  I don't know what is wrong with her.  There are some things, she just cannot seem to get - As long as there is no work for her to do - we're Okay.  Only when the school starts it's insanity again.  When can I stop getting being involved in this?  She's almost at middle school level.  Will I have to do her homework and schoolwork through high school.  I wouldn't mind doing it myself, but making her do something - that is horrible.  It's like I have to force her and convince her to do homework or study every 5 minutes, it's like she is doing me a favor... Sorry about this long post, I just had to vent.


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