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7 year old daughter caught with 7 year old boy....
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7 year old daughter caught with 7 year old boy....

Okay, I am a mother of 3 beautiful girls, my oldest is 7.  Today she had a friend over, who is a boy!  She's 7, it should be okay!  I walked in and they were in the closet with the door shut!  Right away I know that it's bad.  Of course, he has his pants down!  They won't tell me who's idea it was or what exactly they were doing but it scares me.How does she even know about any of that? How do I get her to talk to me and not lie?  Please help!
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186844_tn?1209157644
Hello, I think honestly and openess is important, let her know that she will not get in any trouble if she tells the truth, assure her that lying will get her in trouble.  My daughter is 14, and I've been talking to her about sex, boys, etc... for as long as I can remember.  My mom used to hate it (I was a teen mom), but now she understands, and my daughter is so open with me, she's my best friend and still gives me the respect of a mom.  I think it's more important this day and age, especially since once act of sex one can catch HIV, and cause their life.  Now I know I'm going off course, as your daughter is only 7....but I think openly talking with her is the best thing.  I'm the envy of all my friends and family with teenagers because of the openess that my daughter and I have, and it's because I've ALWAYS talked frank to her.  Ask yourself, when you started out WHO in the world could've made you stop?  So my method is just sharing and talking as much as I can, cause though NO parents want their child out here doing certain things (again going off course, and talking about your 7 year old in the future).......I guess what I'm trying to say, is start being open with her, and talking about things (sex, boys, drugs, etc...) NOW, these are the things that MOST kids are not comfortable talking to their parents about, BUT if you make her comfortable now, when she gets older, she'll talk openly, honestly, and won't be afraid to discuss certain topics (I was SCARED to say sex to my mom, which is probably why I was pregnant at 15 (LOL, yeah right, blame the mom, LOL)....but surely you get my point.  I should've been able to speak with her about urges I was having, and she could've spoken to me about it and/or got me birth control....BUT of course now since I LOVE my daughter more than life itself, I'm glad I didn't
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Avatar_f_tn
Since she has all sisters, she is probably just curious. It's totally natural.  I feel it's just a case of "I'll show you mine if you show me yours". Talk to her about it. Obviously they knew that it was private or they wouldn't have went in the closet. Try not to let her see your emotions and I do encourage talking to her, privately. Good luck to you.tmv
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Avatar_n_tn
Thank you all so much!  I wil start to talk to her and be honest and open about everything!  I want her to be my best friend but at the same time I thought she might get wild b/c I was a friend more than a mom, but if it works for you, it should work for me!  I will try to start talking to her more b/c I don't want her to go somewhere else, or do something I maybe could've prevented!  Thank you all and I am still willing to listen to more comments!
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Avatar_n_tn
Believe it or not it is VERY normal - They are curious - I found out my daughter and my neice did something similar - It catches you off guard for a minute but I never got mad at her for it - I just explained that is NOT appropriate and her private parts are for HER only and the same goes for my niece.   Boys are different than girls and they wonder why -  I think it is a good time to sit and talk about the differences between the 2 in a way she'll understand.   Good Luck.  
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Avatar_n_tn
My daughter who is now 16 did this when she was little.  She was actually 7 also.  She happened to do it w/ another little girl.  
I let her go over to her friends house to play, the mother was there.  
About an hour later the mother called me and said I need to tell you something, come over.
So I did and she told me that Amber (my daughter) and her daughter were on the floor w/ there pants down and that her little girl was on top of Amber. She said it was her daughter that talked my daughter into doing this.  

Let's say at first; I was disgusted, angry and down right embarressed.  But she was just a child and she didn't know any better.  She let someone talk her into something.  She was very upset about it and she knew I was very unhappy w/ her.

I sat her down, explained to her that what she did was wrong and why it was wrong.  I hugged her and told her that I still loved her.

It never happened again - and she is a great kid, does great in school, still a virgin and has great friends.

It'll be ok... kids are kids - at any given time they make mistakes.  That's what were here for, to help them through there mistakes and to make them better people.
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Avatar_n_tn
My daughter (7) did pretty much the same thing with another girl (7), they got caught by the other Girls mother. My daughter came home crying out her eyes she was in shock and totally emberessed. I told her that she is not in trouble . I told her that it is ok for her to explore her body but only for her and only when she is alone. She told me the other girl talked her into having "Sex" with her.
I dont think it is such a big deal, if you really think about it we all played "Doctor" at some point of time. And it doesnt help to totally forbid your child to do things like that you will just mess then up in the long run. If you forbid it they will do it anyways. Its curiousity.
Like i said i told her its inapropriate to do it when somebody else wants you to do it or wants to watch you do it.
Its the age where kinds explore, there is nothing that you can do about it. I think you are wrong when you tell them you made a mistake. How can it be a mistake if they dont even know what there doing?
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