7 year old daughter let family pet lick her vagina
I caught my 7 year old daughter with my parents dog under the blanket with her pants down. I asked her what she was doing and she became quiet and hid her face which she will do when she knows she is in trouble. After several attempts to ask her what she was doing I asked did you let the dog lick your privates and she said yes. I asked her why would she let the dog do that and she said she didn't know why. I asked her if she has seen this anywhere and she said no. I explained to her that it is ok to explore yourself as long as she is alone and no one esle is around. I asked her if someone has ever touched her or make her touch them and she said no. I told her that noone is to ever touch her and that she needs to tell me if anyone ever does. I also told her that it is unexceptable for a dog to be around or have the dog lick her. A week later I saw her on the couch under the blanket with the dog and she had a shocked look on her face. I took her to the side and asked her what she was doing and I asked if she let the dog lick her again and she said yes and I asked her where and at first she said her leg but after further questioning she said her privates. I asked her why she did it and she said she didn't know why and that she wanted the dog to do it. Also last year we found out she took picture of her cousins penis and she was 7 and he was 3. I told her it was not appropriate and she hasn't done that again. I am going crazy with the things that are running through my mind because I feel she knows the difference between what is right and wrong and why did she do it again with the dog. I called the doctor to get her in so that I can have the doctor speak with her to see if therapy is necessary. I just don't want to ignore a problem if there is one. What should I do??
Ugh. This is NOT what you want to think about your child doing. As a mother, I feel your pain. You've set a boundary. Now watch and see. I would not make anymore to do about it unless you see other sexualized behavior (which that may or may not have been). Hopefully she was just playing around. Now she knows that is a no no.
I'd keep tabs on your dog and her as well.
If you see anything else develop, call on the help of a professional to evaluate the situation. Peace and luck
Thank you for your advice I have made it where she is no longer aloud to have a blanket over her and the dog. I just feel like I am going crazy thinking the worst in the situation. I don't know if it is something I should bring up to the doctor bc I dont want to make her feel any worse about it. My dad says kids do weird stuff and this could be just one of those things and she is not thinking about the sexual aspect of it. I just don't want to sweep it under the rug because it has been eating at me. I just had my son in May and I am not going to lie I worry if she would do anything to him . My mind is racing because I want to know why and I keep asking her why and I feel like I could be damaging her more by keep bringing it up but I cant let it go.
You just have to let this go. Watch her for sure. But yes, it is not a good idea to continually discuss it. She very well could be doing just what your dad said . . . being a kid doing weird stuff. I think you can supervise your baby and her and keep a watchful eye over her. But don't keep grilling her about it.
If you feel bothered down the road, you OR she can talk to a therapist. but let this go in terms of fretting over it with her.
It is probably an isolated episode. Watch for anything else but move on as best you can. good luck
The only thing that still bothers me is that I caught her twice. I thought our talk the first time would have done the trick. Im sorry Iam just one of those people who needs to be reassured. I want to thank you for your advice I really don't have anyone to talk to about this and I just want my daughter to be safe.
I really don't think you should worry,it sounds like a phase.kids do do 'weird' stuff and sounds like inniocent experimenting.I'd keep an eye on her and her behaviour in general.If she seems happy enough.I wouldn't worry.Try not(however hard!) not to make to big a deal of it to her but also make it clear she can talk to you about anything and not to feel bad about what she has done,try not to worry,good luck :)
Thank you so much!! When I saw it again I immediately called the doctor but our appointment isn't for another week and a half and she doesnt want to go but I am tring to let her know that talking to her doctor is ok. I think she is embarresed and she said she doesnt want me in the room when she speaks with the doctor. Is this the next stept because it happened twice or an I pushing the issue. Or since I have set new boundries since the last incident I should see how it goes.
Honestly, I would not talk to the doctor about this with her there. My doctor wouldn't even have that conversation in front of a child. For things like that, you call the doctor and talk to them via phone or email. Then if they want to see the child for an exam they will but they will give you guidance. But don't put her through the humiliation of bringing this up to her doctor with her there. When I've had "things"---- this is what my doctor prefers so that she can really discuss them with me without the child listening.
Just an update... We went to the doctor and I spoke with her by myself before she went into see my daughter. She was just concerned with the dog being involved. She asked if she could have see it somewhere such as a TV channel that we might have and I explained that we don't have any sexual channels that she is able to stumble upon. She did speak with my daughter alone because I thought it was best for me not to be in the room beacuse my daughter is really shy and when strangers talk to her she looks for me to answer them. She did do a physical exam to make sure that she was never sexually abused. She showed no signs of abuse so the doctor referred me to a Child Psychiatrist because she said her experience only goes so far in this area. I did make an appointment with them and we go next week. It will probably take several sessions to get her to open up and talk about it because she is very shy. Going to the doctor helped me because I know that I am doing all that I can to help my daughter if their is a problem that she is not telling me about. Thanks again for all your help!!!
You are blowing this all out of proportion. The answer is so simple - she gets the dog to do it because it FEELS GOOD! That's all there is to it.
I have read of this before on the net - a little girl in Catholic school came home for lunch. While she was home alone, she put peanut butter "down there" for the dog to lick! I always found that amusing, and very kid like. (I think she wrote about this herself years later.) Then she went to school for the afternoon. Kids are kids. :) Forget your problem, you don't have one. You CERTAINLY don't need a psychiatrist, to shame and humiliate your daughter even more. Let it go - you don't have a problem, and neither does your daughter. :)
That is a really gross story and would be a problem for me as a mother.
I would certainly intervene if anything like this is going on.
To our poster, I am glad that you are following up. I would downplay it to your daughter though and just let the psychologist explore it in their way without much discussion about it from you. You don't want her to internalize this event as 'life changing' so that she can move on from it.
I'm really glad I found your post seeing as though there's barely anything on the Internet regarding this topic. I just caught my 7, almost 8 year old daughter doing the same thing! To be perfectly honest right now, I'm freaking out. I am not worried about the feedback I'm going to get on here. This is my child! I've never seen any kind of behaviors like this from her or heard of any kind of behaviours like this about any other child I know. I am proud of the way I handled it when I caught her. Thank god I didn't freak out! I was thinking to myself the whole time "don't scar her, don't scar her". I asked what she was doing and she did a couple "umms" before she fessed up, but she did fully fess up. When I asked why she was doing it she said she didn't know. I said "well having the dog lick your privates is not okay. It's perfectly okay to touch yourself privately but NOT OKAY for our dog to lick you there". She said she understood. I repeated it a couple times because I was still in shock and I wanted to drill it in. I also told her its not clean because a dogs mouth carries germs. She seemed not very embarrassed actually. She apologized to our dog. I didn't ask her to. I said she didn't really have to do that because it's more unclean for her more than it is for our dog. I then took her into the bath tub and she was already talking about other things. It was bed time, we talked a little more about how she shouldn't ever do that again and I asked her how many times she had done this. She said not many. I asked how many exactly. She started counting on her fingers!! Counting!!! She says 4 or 6 times. And I know my daughter and that means way more times than that! Then i dropped it and we read a book. How vome i mever caught her before? Its not like i dont watch her! I am so worried here. What is going on!? I feel as though is this something that's going to keep happening? How in the world is she sexualized this young? How did she even realize how to let the dog lick her there?? I masturbated too but never this way. I had animals and never even thought of this. I've been crying all night. Oh yes and I did ask her if anyone had ever touched her inappropriately and she said no. I'm calling my therapist tomorrow to see what she thinks because so much is running through my head right now. This is my baby here. I don't want this to be about some underlying issue. I need some answers. I don't think I'll be sleeping tonight.
You have to be extremily sensitive to this situation. Everything you do is so critical. The point is once you have caught them you dont even have to explain that it was wrong, because the already know its not normal because of the fact that noone else does it. Things like this happen ALOT. It may not be said but only because its private. Kids will grow out of it. They grow up and find different avenues of sexual pleasure and eventually understand realiticly whats going on. Taking them to a doctor, drilling them, only shows how ignorant you are. Theyre your baby. Your child. Just be on theyre team and help guide them in the right direction. they will mature and get it much like you do as an adult.
Everyone is different. Some kids mature sexually at a young age. Some kids later in life. Kids when they are younger, have a smallers spectrum of outlets they can use to defuse theyre sexual urges. Like a dog for instance. Dogs do this naturally. im sure the dog tried for it first, it happened, and then the child went along with it. Its very simple. No need to freak out.
If you cannot relate to your child, its totally fine. But please maintain your composure and just simply deal with it in a simple manor.
Hi I hope all went well. I'm glad u posted as I just caught my 10yr old doing the same thing in the back yard. It is a massive shock and u do feel helpless. I also will be going to the doctors about this as I am sick to my stomach. I never told her off but I did explain that it's wrong. I'm glad I'm not the only one out there thanks heaps for posting everything it's a big help
Im soo sorry u have this going on right now. Our daughter is almost 7 and i dont think she even know anything about sex or anything. If this were my child the first thing id do after speaking to her about it is call the dr. I wouldnt b able to just let it go. Now with tht being said i would as why and all those questions then let it go with her BUT i would find out whats going on. This is ur child and u need to make sure she is ok and was never abused or touched by anyone. I say call the dr have her checked and then follow what the dr says weather it b do nothi g or talk to a psychologist. When a child is tht young the psychologist asks different types of questions than we would to find out y. The have a whole different approach on things. Good luck and keep us posted. I hope for the best!!
I think you're worrying about nothing in particular. Cindybrady said it all - she's doing it because she's discovered it feels good, and she would most likely have tired of it before long.
And if the dog wasn't hurting her, and she wasn't hurting herself - and no-one else was getting involved - what's the trouble? Why did you have to make such a big thing out of it? Fear of loss of control, fear of your kids' self-knowledge?
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