Fear of Poo / Holding On / Refusing to Poo on Toilet or Potty

[PooMama]

Not a question - just a comment:  My four year old son has been potty trained (for wee) for almost two years now, but REFUSES to do poo on the potty or toilet.  He has a long history of constipation, usually particularly bad if there are any changes in his life or tension in the household, or we simply loose sight of his water intake.  Twice he has been in hospital for pain and obstruction in his bowels.  First time, we had a very bad doctor who recommended suppositories and enemas.  These created HUGE poos, which caused incredible pain.  Our son developed his intense aversion to the toilet following these episodes.  The second hospital visit was more successful.  We were prescribed MOVICOL.  Its an over the counter pharmacy medication, which is NOT ABSORBED by the body so there is ZERO health risk for infants and children (though you should monitor there water intake and electrolytes in their system if you medicate too heavily or for too long).  It simply draws water from the body into the bowel, to soften even the most stubborn hard large or impacted poo.  He passed two - three weeks worth of poo completely pain free.  Now, we give him 1/3 to 1/2 a sachet of movicol every night in juice and it creates nice soft comfy poo ... we still have the behavioural issues associated with refusing to use the toilet.  We have consulted numerous experts, child psychologists, doctors, etc, and they all have a new plan, but basically it is within our son's control, not ours, and we are waiting for it to resolve, and trying to be patient, and trying to remind him that his poo is soft and the toilet does not make it hard, as he suspects.  But thankfully, we do not have the problem of it getting big and hard while he holds on.  For anyone who deals with a child holding on, and the pain that causes, you will know that it is more important to manage the consistency of the poo before the behavioural issues.  The colon stretches, and the poo starts to load up in there, so that it can really never pass, unless you soften it again.  It takes a few months to return to normal size.  Before that, the child cannot sense it coming until it is on the way out, at which time they seem to like to crouch down and soil instead of run to the toilet.  It is really really important to continue to medicate your child, with poo softeners, consistently, so that they have a good few months without a hard or big poo, before you start working on those behavioural issues like aversion to potty.  Solve the medical issue first, then turn to improving the grown up behaviours.  AND - the less you stress about it, the easier it will be for your child to overcome it without pressure.  

[teddybears4ever2]

This could also be a case of IBS, Chrons, or Colitis, as well.  I look into it as well as what Emily said and see if there is an underlying problem.

[Emily_MHManager]

Hi there -

I don't normally comment on medical questions, but my nephew had this same issue, and it turns out he has Celiac (allergy to wheat and gluten).  The fear of pain with pooping was a huge mess, and he is just now getting over it - a year later - but he is SO much better now.

Emily

[specialmom]

Had this issue with my son and we gave him simple grape juice-------------- solved the problem.