Aa
Time to ditch?
Dr. Gould,
I've posted here before about the benefits of talk therapy in relieving anxiety. I've found a therapist that I like personally, but I disagree with her methodology somewhat. It seems she and I spend a lot of time talking about my past and about my childhood, about whether I'm more like my father, mother, brother, etc. That's all well and good, but it's almost like she's trying to produce some "aha!" moment from my past which will explain everything and cause all the pieces to fall into place. Since I had a pretty normal childhood, I'd rather our therapy session focus on the here-and-now. At this point, I'm strongly inclined to just accept that she's coming at this from an angle that won't be of much use to me over the long run, and that I should find someone else. Does that sound reasonable?
I've posted here before about the benefits of talk therapy in relieving anxiety. I've found a therapist that I like personally, but I disagree with her methodology somewhat. It seems she and I spend a lot of time talking about my past and about my childhood, about whether I'm more like my father, mother, brother, etc. That's all well and good, but it's almost like she's trying to produce some "aha!" moment from my past which will explain everything and cause all the pieces to fall into place. Since I had a pretty normal childhood, I'd rather our therapy session focus on the here-and-now. At this point, I'm strongly inclined to just accept that she's coming at this from an angle that won't be of much use to me over the long run, and that I should find someone else. Does that sound reasonable?
I've found focusing on the here and now (material I've taken to therapy with me) useful although often this has also included material from my past.
Sometimes when we only want to discuss things in the present (although they seem really important to us at the time) we are controlling our therapy time and protecting ourselves (often subconsciously) from deeper issues.
What I am trying to say is that the issues affecting you now may in fact be related to past experiences or have related themes.
In some respects it almost sounds as though you are running from gaining awareness.
I have been in a situation where I have liked a T but have been badly affected by her methods and have been traumatized by the process.
I would discuss your concerns, thoughts and feelings with your T and if she is receptive then continue your therapy with her. If not, thank her for her time and leave.
Trust yourself and your feelings, these are the single most important things you can do to help yourself. If something in therapy doesn't feel right (and you're not in denial and avoiding issues) then you're probably right.
Being in good therapy with a good T while hard is also easy -if that makes sense.
J
Sometimes when we only want to discuss things in the present (although they seem really important to us at the time) we are controlling our therapy time and protecting ourselves (often subconsciously) from deeper issues.
What I am trying to say is that the issues affecting you now may in fact be related to past experiences or have related themes.
In some respects it almost sounds as though you are running from gaining awareness.
I have been in a situation where I have liked a T but have been badly affected by her methods and have been traumatized by the process.
I would discuss your concerns, thoughts and feelings with your T and if she is receptive then continue your therapy with her. If not, thank her for her time and leave.
Trust yourself and your feelings, these are the single most important things you can do to help yourself. If something in therapy doesn't feel right (and you're not in denial and avoiding issues) then you're probably right.
Being in good therapy with a good T while hard is also easy -if that makes sense.
J
MEDICAL PROFESSIONAL
Finding the right therapist is important, and dealing with the here and now is also critical to success. There is a way to combine the past and present which makes the richest kind of therapy possible, so before you make any changes, talk to your therapist and tell her what you need, and depending on her reaction, and talking it through, make your decision.
Sounds like you're looking for a CBT practitioner.
How would you feel about talking to your therapists about your concerns? Most therapists take a "client-centered" approach to their work, and it is likely she would be open to your ideas about where the therapy needs to be focused right now.
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