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Getting Over it too Quickly
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Getting Over it too Quickly

Hey guys.  Is it unhealthy to have decided not to let your pending divorce effect you anymore and to actually feel fine ever since you made that decision to not let it effect you?  I am currently going through this and I don't know if I am just numb to it currently or if I am over it.  I still love my wife to death and I'm still attached but I'm just not feeling bad about it anymore and that was not even two months after we became separated.  I'm listening to a song currently that I attached a lot of feelings with the marriage on and it's not even effecting me in the slightest.
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973741_tn?1342346373
Hm.  Well, I think if the relationship is over, it is over and you've emotionally moved on.  This is okay.  I was just trying to check and make sure you've processed everything.  Sounds like you have and are coping/moving on nicely.  Hey, I'd rather that than to hear you are suffering and miserable.  And what she does and doesn't believe doesn't matter anymore, does it?  Keep going strong, keep working on you, get the troubles in your life resolved and it sounds like you are moving in a positive direction.  Peace and luck to you
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I think you may have recognized that it's over, there's no more you can do and you need to move on.  You may have done all your "mourning" before and during the divorce and are just done!  Don't beat yourself up over this, often we realize that our marriage is over long before the divorce occurs, and are relieved that it's over.  But if in the future some of the feelings start to creep back in make sure you deal with them, pretending they don't exist will just cause you more harm than good.  When I finally got the courage to tell my husband I wanted a divorce, I felt like the world was lifted from my shoulders and slept like a baby that night.  Too much had happened in the years leading up to this point that I had checked out of the marriage long before the divorce.  I hope this helps and I wish you all the best.
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3236191_tn?1355144215
Thanks mammo for your feedback.  Yeah I was expecting it to maybe come back and bite me later.  I will address this as it comes to me.  Good to hear you're doing well yourself.
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3149845_tn?1386354841
Hi, you have a great mind for sure. You have accepted your situation, good for you! If these women dont want us then its there loss. Who knows what great future i can create that she just lost out on. Success is the best revenge.Why dont you create a simple product that the public will buy, have it Patented and get rich. There are many things that society needs. Get rich and get happy.
dave
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973741_tn?1342346373
I do think that there could be something else going on as well.  Sometimes difficult situations leave us a little numb.  Is that what you are describing?  Are you relieved or void of emotion?  They are different.
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3236191_tn?1355144215
Well actually I left her for various reason, most of which I'd rather not get into on here at this time.  It was tearing us both up staying together and she refused to leave me even though she was wanting out so I decided it would be best for both of us if we split up.  I still care about her and love her but I guess that's in the past now since I came back to the US with the help of the consulate and so they made my passport invalid and now I owe a bunch of money to them.  I am currently doing my own form of Buddhist-like reclusion and enjoying it.  I feel relieved that it's over but this was sudden after I realized feeling like crap over it day in and day out was doing nothing but ruining my day and the day of others who have to be around me.  Even if I felt like crap for her sake, she isn't going to believe I'm not coping very well without her no matter what I say or do, especially since I have flat affect from schizophrenia, so why bother letting myself feel down?
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973741_tn?1342346373
Hm.  Well, I think if the relationship is over, it is over and you've emotionally moved on.  This is okay.  I was just trying to check and make sure you've processed everything.  Sounds like you have and are coping/moving on nicely.  Hey, I'd rather that than to hear you are suffering and miserable.  And what she does and doesn't believe doesn't matter anymore, does it?  Keep going strong, keep working on you, get the troubles in your life resolved and it sounds like you are moving in a positive direction.  Peace and luck to you
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