Aa
Worried to death/OCD
I went back to a guys place after tons of drinking in a club. When we got there we had unprotected mutual oral sex with NO ejaculation in my mouth on his part. He attempted to have unprotected vaginal sex with me, but I refused without a condom so he went to put on one. When he came out the bathroom, he had the condom on, but now I'm not even sure if it stayed on. He was inside me for maybe two minute, maximum, because his penis was too big and I was in pain. He stopped when I told him to stop but I forgot to check if the condom was still on. We fell asleep and when we woke up in the morning, I gave him another blowjob and he came on my chest but some got into my eye. As we were gathering our clothes to leave, I saw the condom on the ground, next to him, so I know i didn't imagine it being put on. Whether it stayed on is a different story.
This was all that happened, but I'm freaking out. I've had two one night stands prior to this and each time I have freaked out and gotten tested and had anxiety/panic attacks over these encounters. I promised myself I would never do it again, yet here I am. I've been trying to text him to ask him about his status but he hadn't replied. I'll give him the benefit of the doubt as he had told me that he was leaving for training with the army the next day after we had sex and he'd back in a week to take me on a date. We shared a taxi home and he even paid for my fare. So hopefully I'll be able to contact him when he gets back.
It seems that since I lost my Virginity to a an unreported one night stand, HIV is all I hear about about and think about. It's all everyone wants to talk to me about. I feel like it's following me and I'm scared. I see signs of it everywere I go, as if I'm destined to have it. I know this magical thinking and crazy, but I still can't reason my way out of it. Ever since I started fearing HIV, I've been terrified of seeing the numbers 22 and 44 (which I now see everyday and every hour by the way).
I feel like I've brought if on myself by thinking and fearing it so much. I try to avoid hearing about it, but it follows me. I'm so terrified. Please help me and tell me if any of my fears are rational? Is it even worth it for me to go in for an HIV test based on my actions from that night or would testing just elevate my fears.
Any help would appreciated and sorry to sound so crazy. I'm a straight A student at one of the best universities in the country, so I know how to think rationally and analytically, but just not about this.
This was all that happened, but I'm freaking out. I've had two one night stands prior to this and each time I have freaked out and gotten tested and had anxiety/panic attacks over these encounters. I promised myself I would never do it again, yet here I am. I've been trying to text him to ask him about his status but he hadn't replied. I'll give him the benefit of the doubt as he had told me that he was leaving for training with the army the next day after we had sex and he'd back in a week to take me on a date. We shared a taxi home and he even paid for my fare. So hopefully I'll be able to contact him when he gets back.
It seems that since I lost my Virginity to a an unreported one night stand, HIV is all I hear about about and think about. It's all everyone wants to talk to me about. I feel like it's following me and I'm scared. I see signs of it everywere I go, as if I'm destined to have it. I know this magical thinking and crazy, but I still can't reason my way out of it. Ever since I started fearing HIV, I've been terrified of seeing the numbers 22 and 44 (which I now see everyday and every hour by the way).
I feel like I've brought if on myself by thinking and fearing it so much. I try to avoid hearing about it, but it follows me. I'm so terrified. Please help me and tell me if any of my fears are rational? Is it even worth it for me to go in for an HIV test based on my actions from that night or would testing just elevate my fears.
Any help would appreciated and sorry to sound so crazy. I'm a straight A student at one of the best universities in the country, so I know how to think rationally and analytically, but just not about this.
I tested negative!!' :) I forgot to come back and say but thank you for all your kind words and support.
I would say , your anxiety will give all the symptoms. now you will watch every single part in your body , all will looks like a ARS symptoms. Just wait for 28 days get tested with DUO .
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It's been 8 days since I had unprotected oral sex and the ulcer has appeared. Should I be worried about this?
Also, the cold that I've had since 3 days after the sex hasn't disappeared. My sore throat is gone, my nose is still a little runny/blocked and my cough is still a little there. I have tension in my head, like a headache. Could these be ars symptoms?
It's been 8 days since I had unprotected oral sex and the ulcer has appeared. Should I be worried about this?
Also, the cold that I've had since 3 days after the sex hasn't disappeared. My sore throat is gone, my nose is still a little runny/blocked and my cough is still a little there. I have tension in my head, like a headache. Could these be ars symptoms?
I woke up with an ulcer at the top of my mouth. It's not too big or painful, but it's there. I read somewhere that can be an ars symptom. Its been
Yeah I'll just have to take a test. Here we go again, third time in this stupid situation. Thank you for all your help, and sorry I wouldn't take it in. Logically, I'm sure I'm okay, but that "What if?..." is a killer.
Not sure anything I tell you will help your anxiety, so with that said test with a DUO test at 28 days.
If you held your eye open and he ejaculated directly into it then that is a risk. You said he ejaculated on your chest and not your face, so really I don't see a risk.
And a white, straight male (I assume) in the UK, unlikely he would have HIV.
If you held your eye open and he ejaculated directly into it then that is a risk. You said he ejaculated on your chest and not your face, so really I don't see a risk.
And a white, straight male (I assume) in the UK, unlikely he would have HIV.
But how much is enough? Like tons and tons, or just a little bit more? I don't want to NOT test if there was even a slight risk. Other people are saying that the lining/membrane in the eye make it a route for transmission and that's what's freaking me out. My anxiety is on fire. Sorry for being such a bother but I'm just really scared. My family is super strict and religious and I'm scared to approach them about my fears, so I have to do it here.
The response of the eye is very very fast, likely that when it saw it coming it closed and maybe a little bit of fluid did get in but would not be enough.
It did get in my eyes straight from him. He shot off and it landed straight into my eye. I've texted him and I know he's read it, but he's not replying. Truthfully, between my anxiety, guilt, shame, and being mad at myself for breaking my promise to never do this again, I think I might have to test again. I just can't face a positive result, for anything, I'd lose my mind. Thanks for replying, though. You're tight about the condom, it's unlikely that he took it off.
In reality ejaculate probably didn;t get in your eye straight from him, but if it did you need more then a little.
Your speculating that he was not wearing a condom...don't knwo why since you saw it on him.
Your speculating that he was not wearing a condom...don't knwo why since you saw it on him.
Thank you for replying! Deep down, I feel like I'm okay, but just living amongst people who have HIV just keeps it in my mind all the time and that's where the panic comes from. My last test was on October 21 2014, 30 days after my last exposure (which wasn't even much of a risky one at all) and the reassurance I felt from that only lasted two weeks.
That's why I really want to not test if it's not necessary because I'll just keep going back for reassurance that will never be 100% enough for me. I think the best thing to do is do calm myself down, read all the official data on transmission and risk and then, when I feel confident enough, I'll go and test for every std once and for all.
Also, is there any risk on anything happening after some of his ejaculate ended up in my eye? It went straight in and I went to clean my eye on the sink. My eye was red and stinging for a few minutes, but that was it? Any risk there?
And, also, say he wasn't wearing a confirm, I suffered quite few tares because he went inside me dry. Since he didn't ejaculate and he was only in there for a minute or, so, assuming he had no condom on, how likely was it that I could've caught HIV from that kind of exposure?
That's why I really want to not test if it's not necessary because I'll just keep going back for reassurance that will never be 100% enough for me. I think the best thing to do is do calm myself down, read all the official data on transmission and risk and then, when I feel confident enough, I'll go and test for every std once and for all.
Also, is there any risk on anything happening after some of his ejaculate ended up in my eye? It went straight in and I went to clean my eye on the sink. My eye was red and stinging for a few minutes, but that was it? Any risk there?
And, also, say he wasn't wearing a confirm, I suffered quite few tares because he went inside me dry. Since he didn't ejaculate and he was only in there for a minute or, so, assuming he had no condom on, how likely was it that I could've caught HIV from that kind of exposure?
OCD has a habit of making people irrational over everyday life. Your risk is zero - there is no evidence to suggest that he did not put on a condom, and I commend your insistence upon safe sex. Even if he had not put on a condom, the chance of acquiring HIV is still very very low. Most hetrosexual sex is safe from HIV in Western countries - it is not risk free but the chances of you having HIV from this event will be something in the region of 1:20000 which for practical purposes indicates no risk. Blow jobs (oral sex) is risk free if thinking HIV, although more common STD's can be caught via this route.
Based on the above I would not recommend testing, however if you are worried a HIV Duo test 28 days post exposure will provide you with a conclusive result. I'm guessing much of your anxiety is based upon guilt of the event, which is common amongst many young people. There are testing centres in Birmingham that can provide you with same day results, but again do not take a test until 28 days post exposure. Do not waste your money on a HIV RNA test which is expensive and not needed. Your local GUM clinic can offer a test for free (although often they will only use a standard antibody test 90 days post exposure) or for approximately £65 -120 you can pay privately for a DUO test.
Having said all of that I wouldn't recommend testing anyway, but with highly anxious people it can provide reassurance.
Based on the above I would not recommend testing, however if you are worried a HIV Duo test 28 days post exposure will provide you with a conclusive result. I'm guessing much of your anxiety is based upon guilt of the event, which is common amongst many young people. There are testing centres in Birmingham that can provide you with same day results, but again do not take a test until 28 days post exposure. Do not waste your money on a HIV RNA test which is expensive and not needed. Your local GUM clinic can offer a test for free (although often they will only use a standard antibody test 90 days post exposure) or for approximately £65 -120 you can pay privately for a DUO test.
Having said all of that I wouldn't recommend testing anyway, but with highly anxious people it can provide reassurance.
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