Aa
should i be worried out of my mind?
Hi. New here. Never expected I would need to ask a question here. Separated for 14 months after a long, long marriage, many decades. I decided after 14 months of separation and finally getting myself into a good place to try the dating scene. Talked with a guy a few times then we met for a drink. Went back to his house after a nice long talk, revealing we know mutual people, and stupid me thought something might happen but not "going all the way" was not what i expected. Well it happened now im freaking out. He used a condom which was good until the condom came off or he took it off. He was having a difficult time maintaining an erection. I couldnt even tell you if he finished while in me because he couldnt keep it in much. I am scared to death I could have caught something. (HIV) We talked after and he said he was tested because of a recent surgery and he was clean of everything. I want so much to believe him. He even told me the next day to chill because he was clean. I went to the doctor today and was tested for stds but found out i have to wait for HIV test. I lost it. How could i be so stupid. I am a woman in my 50's.I should know better. What is anyones opinion? Please I need to calm myself down.
There are no test to give a conclusive negative test earlier than 3 months post exposure.
Like I have said before,don't be so hard on yourself and there are HIV tests that have been designed for early detection.I have mentioned to you which tests they are.It is a waiting game,but while you wait you need to remain focused and strong.Fear is not rational,don't let it rule your thoughts.
Im having the most awful time today. Filled with tears and doubt. I dont mean to go on and on about this but really im struggling.I dont want to worry but i am, I dont want to cry anymore but i am. I feel so disgusted with myself that i let all this happen. The guy this happened with calls me everyday to see how I am. He keeps assuring me he is fine. But the new man i starting dating is making my fears and anxiety worse. Im so afraid i wouldve passed something on to him and worse yet he has stopped calling which makes me think there is someone else and who has he really been with altho he tells me no one in 2 years.I know im saying the same things over and over but friends its beating me up. RainLover 71 you have given up so much of your time to chat with me. I so appreciate it. Please know everyone..I am very scared. Thanks for listening.
Just relax and wait for your results.You do not have to stop dating or being intimate with this man if you really like him,all you have to do is use protection and be safe.
Hi everyone, Well 3 weeks have past and on friday i had a hiv pcr test. Now i am dealing with such anxiety waiting and wondering what the result will be. I am overwhelmed with anxiety. Yes I am taking meds for the anxiety.
I still think i want to take the duo test. SOON.
In the meantime i have met a wonderful guy that i would like to continue to see but with all this anxiety i just dont know. We havent had intercourse but have done oral both ways. Now i feel guilty that i did anything with him because of my encounter i had with another person (see my orignial post) the reason why i had the test done in the first place and have all this anxiety. Now with all the anxiety I am wondering if this new guy is clean. Do i need to have another std test or wait weeks again and have another HIV test because of what me and the new guy i like have done? The dating scene maybe isnt for me. As much as i like the new guy I dont think i will see him because of the anxiety it causes me. I know it sounds crazy but it has been so long since Ive had to do this. I just need peace of mind. Thanks for listening.
I still think i want to take the duo test. SOON.
In the meantime i have met a wonderful guy that i would like to continue to see but with all this anxiety i just dont know. We havent had intercourse but have done oral both ways. Now i feel guilty that i did anything with him because of my encounter i had with another person (see my orignial post) the reason why i had the test done in the first place and have all this anxiety. Now with all the anxiety I am wondering if this new guy is clean. Do i need to have another std test or wait weeks again and have another HIV test because of what me and the new guy i like have done? The dating scene maybe isnt for me. As much as i like the new guy I dont think i will see him because of the anxiety it causes me. I know it sounds crazy but it has been so long since Ive had to do this. I just need peace of mind. Thanks for listening.
Go to the HIV Anxiety fourm. For help dealing with your anxiety. Intill you can get some professinal help. You will be okay. Just relax and dont stress.
still very worried. its affecting my sleeping, eating just everyday life. I cant tell you all how disappointed i am in myself. Jan 27th cant get here soon enough for the HIV PCR, still dont know which one.
My OCD is taking over now i know that. Ive always had the biggest fear of blood and the diseases ex. HIV, that you can get from blood. This triggers the OCD. The only piece of mind i have is when i sleep and thats all i want to do.
I know you all have said dont worry and im trying to understand that. Im just so scared.
Thank you to a couple of the members who have emailed me privately. You have given me a wealth of info.
Please i need all your support because I dont know if im going to make it through this waiting.
Is there any other good forums for me to post on Medhelp? or any other members who have some expertise, I would love to know.
Thank you all again.
My OCD is taking over now i know that. Ive always had the biggest fear of blood and the diseases ex. HIV, that you can get from blood. This triggers the OCD. The only piece of mind i have is when i sleep and thats all i want to do.
I know you all have said dont worry and im trying to understand that. Im just so scared.
Thank you to a couple of the members who have emailed me privately. You have given me a wealth of info.
Please i need all your support because I dont know if im going to make it through this waiting.
Is there any other good forums for me to post on Medhelp? or any other members who have some expertise, I would love to know.
Thank you all again.
I understand what you are going through and I'm not angry at all.I just want you to Have the best possible test to calm your obvious anxiety.The answerers on this forum,including myself are here to assist you.If you need to talk you can always send one of us a message via the inbox.
thank you. dont mean to make u angry just understand im scared. just looking for support so thanks.
I will say this for the last time,take a DUO test at 4 weeks which is 99.89% accurate at this time frame,you are not going to get better odds than that.The follow up at 12 weeks for a final test.
i hope so. its like time is standing still. i havent had to worry abt the dating thing in 34 years. its all new and i was stupid. i do know that i was clean because i was tested last fall after husband left 10 months prior because of an affair. i wasnt that upset about having any possible disease when i found out he was with another woman as i am now. Crazy. maybe because its because i knew him and this guy the other night i only briefly new. I know he's not a needle drug user or gay just dont know his past altho he said he has no hiv and has been tested before he had surgery. i am a worry wort as you all can see. i just need support and dont have alot around me that i can share this with. THank You so much.
Be pationt I know its eazyer said than done. But i am willing to bet you when this is all over with. You will look back on this and say to yourself wow I was worried over nothing.
3 months is accurate. 6 weeks is a good indication, 8 weeks probably will not change.
ok so let me ask you this if i get tested at the 3 week period is that an accurate test? I will find out the name of the test. My doc didnt tell me yesterday.You guys on this forum are so great. Thank you for your thoughts and please keep them coming.
Doesn't matter if he tests positive or negative, that is his test no yours. Personally I would not want to know if he tested positive if I was in your shoes because up until 3 months your life would be hell. And then you get a negative test...not worth the mental torture you would put yourself through.
i have contacted my therapist. good call!!!
should i worry that he didnt have himself tested but then again maybe he was told it was too soon.
should i worry that he didnt have himself tested but then again maybe he was told it was too soon.
The RNA doesn't look for antibodies,it looks for the virus itself.Yes, it was good of him to do this,all your problems would be solved if he took an Hiv test and was negative,provided he had no other exposure in the 3 months prior.
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