Anyone had spiritual problems while on treatment? Other posts, too.

[susan400]

As you all know, I've treated many times.  One thing that I haven't seen brought up much is the spiritual aspects of yourself while treating.  It's so strange, but whenever I'm on treatment, I find myself feeling like my connection and relationship with God is so affected.  Off of treatment, I don't have this problem.  It's really very disconcerting.  Just when you feel like you'd need God more than ever (or your higher power), I feel so disconnected from my faith and everything.  I still keep praying through this time, but something about these drugs seems to be an issue during treatment with my faith and related spiritual issues.  I'm trying to word this post without making it biased towards any one religion.  I'm just curious if anybody else has had this experience, or if it's just me??  If you rather talk via email, off of forum, you can email me at ***@****   Just put something in the subject line so that I don't think it's spam.  

Susan

[FlGuy]

With those numbers procrit may be in order.

[GoofyDad]

I'm with you sister.

Just settin' down here on this knee, watchin the world go by... (natural, not, natural, natural, not, unspecified, unspecified, not...)


PS: Did you ever see the Farside cartoon - It's set in the land of Giant Flies. A kid giant fly has a glass terrarium jug of tiny people he's poking at. Don't know the point of the cartoon.... or my point for that matter... just that maybe someone is having some fun poking to see what happens, I guess. Let's hope no one gives him a lighter.....

[Tallblonde]

Advice to you: "Judge not, lest thee be judged."

Susan

[vegas777]

it's me *da dip* they won't let me on with my original name

spirituality is something so dear to me...And it has been "tested" quite a bit lately...

if you follow the christian beliefs I believe the saying is "he who is without sin may cast the first stone"

if you are agnostic - "do unto others that you would have done unto yourself"

if you are buddhist - "remember the balance of yin yang"


if you are wiccan - "everything you do in life comes back two fold"

if you are a *dip* - "live and let live" or one of my fav's frommy buddy cougar - Peace......(where is coug, hope he's okay)

[FlGuy]

I have some bad news for you both:
Chevy, Your prayers for wisdom and discernment were not answered.

Tall, You're wrong, the toughest thing for a Christian is to follow the Great Commandment - look it up.

To you both: Grow up. You both have a disease worse than HCV which needs treatment.

[Forseegood]

Antics? Issues? around here? he he he. Just when you think it's getting pretty weird...it gets weirder. What can you do?, detach yourself from the bad, focus on the good. Interesting from a sociological perspective, or anthropological, cept there are a bunch of people suffering from sides and etc. and it's good they do get the support and info they do. Thanks for your humor,
a n y t h i n g ... to lighten it up a bit! Hope all is well.

[GoofyDad]

Nope. Not since a little after the gals got the itching powder spinkled in their unmentionables. I hope he is well - he has been having a rough time and I think he was a bit put-off by some of the antics.

Cougar - drop in when you can.....

[vegas777]

have you seen coug around here at all lately?  I wonder how he is doing, he has an awful time with sx's...

*worried momma dip*

[GoofyDad]

9.9  9.7  9.8  9.8  9.7

[mistybean]

You hit it right on the spot.  Treatment also makes you realize that many people are suffering due to long term medical treatments.  It also makes you realize that this may not be the final time in life that one will need to undergo a medical treatment.   For me mortallity issues to not rise but more about how the human body can suffer.

[GoofyDad]

Well, count me among those who take a more clinical view of our existance. That said, this situation does awaken one to a certain sense of mortality, and so I'd have to say this maybe makes me appreciate more what I can do for others while I'm here. I guess that's sharing some space with spirituality -- even if they ain't exactly kissing cousins.

I should point out that there are those who would strongly disagree concerning any improvement in my character :)    

--------------------------------------------------------
Jim said: Treatment also made me scream at the top of my lungs at two 70 year-old ladies in traffic

I guess any chance at an afternoon of romance and passion passed then and there, Jimbo? ;-)

[scruffy]

Hi Susan. Before tx I seemed to connect spiritually in many ways but during tx I had to use my old standbys-nature-trees and plants-rain-these things helped me feel connected to my higher power somewhat. So yes, tx really really added difficulty to my spiritual life. But I gained some insights into myself that could not have arrived in any other way that I can imagine. Was it all worth it(since I did'nt clear)? Hell, I don't have a clue.Smile. Be well troopergal. Frank

[nyhepc]

part of the problem is that this tx is so difficult. we need to concentrate all our mental and physical energies towards ourselves, in order to stay the course.... often at the expense of our families, friends, and maybe spirituality. but it is the nature of families,friends and spirituality to hang around and be there when we finish.
one of the saving graces for me is my job...spending the day with 40 alzheimers pts, draws me out of myself.  i have no time to worry about hep c or how i feel, lol.

[susan400]

Thanks everybody for your various insights, supportive words, encouragement, prayers, etc.  It certainly helps to realize that this is not just something unique to me and my treatment experience.  The last time that I was off of treatment, for 5 mon. I was back to my normal spiritual life.  I suppose I need to hang on to that and remember that this, this treatment life, is not the real me.  I used to do some journaling, not often, but I did.  I've always had a hard time with sticking with it on a regular basis.  I would write something and then, not pick it up again for another 6 mon.  Anyhow, sometimes I wish I could go to a deserted place, out in the middle of the sea by myself, or on the top of a high mountain by myself and just scream at the top of my lungs and then, take a good deep breath and just release it.  But, since that's not possible, I'm just going to have lean on what's left of my faith and what I believe to be God's promises.  But, as I said before, thanks everybody.
God Bless,
Susan

[azgrl]

Hmm...these are interesting thoughts.  Something I never took into consideration pretx. I'm not on tx yet but I have spent a lot of time thinking about the physical aspect of tx not the mental aspect.  I am not a believer other than in myself and my abilities to deal with life. So starting tx will be interesting in seeing the effects of my own beliefs.

deb in az

[NYgirl]

As a born again Christian it's an odd question for me.  Physically and mentally I have not had in many ways as much deep time with God but...

I know that sometimes when I can't feel Him near me it's because He is carrying me.  I have to trust that with all my heart and continue to pray.  Without Him I am lost and have no hope.  With Him I am full of all the possibilities life has to offer me.

I don't want to get preachy because not everyone is my faith - but for ME personally I am glad I can share this with God and put most of it on his shoulders...cause I am just to weak to do it by myself.

Debby

[strator]

Sandi-Thanks for saying it so simply...GOD LOVES US AND IS THERE FOR US, WHETHER WE FEEL IT OR NOT!!!
I guess that's pretty much what my sponsor was trying to get through to me. The inflection in his voice told me he was a lttle ticked and telling me to get out of reward mode. I was lucky to have this treatment, I wasn't doing anything any reponsible human being didn't do on a normal day, I had food to put on the table, was lucky for the opportunity to help someone with no real effort-rather than the usual someone bailing me out or cleaning up my mess, and if my selfishness led me to believe I should be rewarded - maybe I ain't appreciating what I already have in my own home. As far as tx and meds altering our feelings - I believe He knows what we need to just get through the day and wants us to just hang on and get some rest til were ready for those quality times.
Peace,
Don

[suzieq2]

One of my fears upon diagnosis was one that I would loose friends and my Husband would loose patients, because of ingornance and fear of catching this disease. THe opposite has happened. We have recieved the greatest outpouring of support, I could not even begin to tell you how many prayer lists I am on.I have recieved so many uplifting cards and gifts from people I do not even know.My husband has daily uplifting messages for me from from all these genuine caring people. So my faith has only strengthened.I also have not yet cleared the virus.I know thru the grace of god I will. It is the only thing that keeps me chugging along.God has blessed you by giving you the strength to endure what you have.It is hard enough to go thru this with our faith. I do not know how people survive without him.His promise is to heal  us. He will in his time.I am sure that there are many people there for you picking up the slack. Including me, you are in my prayers.He knows what is in your heart and what you are enduring, and understands if he doesn't hear from you as much.We know who faith questioned comes from!

[Tallblonde]

Perhaps nothing about Christianity is more difficult for non-Christians (and even some Christians) to accept than the concept of a God who uses suffering as a way to bring glory to himself.  I, too, stuggle with it often.  But at other times, I'm able to fully embrace and understand that when I'm weak, I'm strong.  And when I'm strong, I'm weak.  There is meaning (and even blessings) in suffering, but we need God's guidance to see that.

Susan

[scruffy]

Everybody has an issue with somebody here at  the medhelp forum but some restraint is in order not to FU everybodies day just for your own gratification.

[scruffy]

I should follow my own advice. Apologies to FlGuy and anybody.

[cuteus]

latin blood? lol! or just human?
take care

[FlGuy]

You're right.  My apologies.  I hope all the heppers out there have a better day today than yesterday.  Better yet tomorrow.  Thanks for the relity check.

[cuteus]

Even though I was raised Catholic, organized religion has no charm for me,except maybe the black services where there seem to be more joy at being in the service and that joy is liberally spread among all present. Other than that, agnostic is more what I presently am. But still believe in some form of a higher spiritual presence, call it Jesus, Allah, the force, etc. There is some spiritual essence beyond the physical body in all living things, not just humans. That is what I feel. Some time ago I came accross two interesting articles on the Brain; I found them extremely interesting how we are "wired" for certain emotions:
http://www.cognitiveliberty.org/neuro/neuronewswk.htm ( this is the Newsweek article on God & the Brain of 5/7/01, if anyone wants to check it out of the library.
and this one is The Biology of Joy from Time magazine. I would check it out of the library also for some intriguing reading:
http://www.time.com/time/archive/preview/0,10987,1015863,00.html

and if neuroscience says that we are wired to feel these higher feelings, maybe the interferon, known to affect the nervous system is also hindering us from feeling by affecting our brain.
HCV, by triggering our system to make interferon, was also causing some depression prior to tx.
As was said before, it will pass after the meds are gone from our system. My apathy definetely lifted quite rapidly after tx.
take care, all of you under the "influence"