how do you cope with this disease please help

[do i or dont i]

For the last 4 years i have been trying to forget i was ever diagnosed with this disease. although its not easy to forget. i think about it everyday and i cant seem to make myself feel good anymore. i hate it and i am scared to tell anyone because i think they will all look down on me. does anyone have these problems or am i alone. i have had one partner and he didnt mind but i also dont think he totally understood everything. i dont even know everything about this disease. does it make me a bad person not to tell anyone. i mean as long as i dont put them at risk, is it okay to keep this a secret. i am so lost and i am depressed and i dont know what to do. the way i see it the people i had     with before i knew dont have it so is it wrong not to tell my future partner i have hep c.
someone please help

[would-rather-be-riding]

I know exactly what you are going through; people automatically think I lived a really care-free life to have gotten HCV, "after all, only drug addicts and prostitutes have hep C.."; or "If you have hepc, then you must have aids and who knows what else!..."
(I got it in the healtcare field.btw)

But people are going to think what they want to think.  And with most people, there is no swaying what they have already decided and have heard about hcv.
I hate being among people knowing something they don't , and knowing if they knew, they would see me  totally different than what they see me as now.  I know what typhoid mary felt like!
Hey, do we expect other people to come up and say "oh I have herpes..."; or "I have manic-depressive disorder..."  NO!  Its NONE OF THEIR DARN BUSINESS!  AND HCV IS NO DIFF THAN ANY OTHER AFFLICTION!  Remember also, even a pastor can have cold sores, a virus; what should that say about HIS past?  (nothing,absolutely NOTHING).

[zazza]

I read something that sounded sound to me: Before you tell anyone that you have hepatitis C, think it through carefully if you think telling them is going to be supportful and helpful for you yourself. Is he or she the kind of person who will support you in the future in the struggle with this disease?

One should not rush into a relationship without using protection anyway, so why not wait and tell your partner when you are certain it is a more long-term relationship. I have hesitated to tell my new partner for a long time, but he finally figured it out, and I could not believe how calm and supportive he was.

[Kit-c]

Hi there,,
I am new here too,
But boy can I relate,,,,trying to paint that smile
on your face,,and tell yourself you don't really feel that bad,.,.,.but really you do---

I have an old friend that wants me to meet up with him
in Hawaii for a few weeks,,
How do I tell him,,,aahhh well I have Hep C,and really don't feel that good,and I am hopfully going to start treament soon,bla,,,bla,,,bla---
So I just say Maybe,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,

This site helps,,,people are in the same boat,
Understand,and have good info,.,

Helps just to know your not alone,,for me anyways----

Hang in there,,try to take care of you----Gale,,(kit)

[hopiangel]

Hey, I ride a Harley for years and when my husband and I were on TX, we couldn't even ride.  And as far as the general feeling about other people knowing, I totally understand.  We couldn't tell most of our friends and those who found out, well, only a few of them are still around. Family,(they hid the kids), so called friends, they all winced at the thought of this disease.  It just goes to show you, no matter the education level, some people are just plain ignorant!  So, you're not alone, we know what you're talking about. Hang in there......IJ(hopiangel)

[GrandOak]

I guess by the time I was diagnosed I hand transitioned to the stage where I believed that I'm "a new creation. The old has gone, the new has come"!

So let others think what they may.  I am not responsible for their thoughts are judgemental attitudes.  Neither can I control them and will only wear myself out or drag myself down should I try.

If they know and still treat me as a lepper, then I figure that I probably could not count them as a friend and be able to rely upon them. Something I'd rather find out now than when I'm in the pit.

[TashaZZ]

I just went through the same.  I didn't know who to tell and felt like I would be judged too.  I had to say something at work because I don't know about the sides and how much I will be out. I also got to the point that it was also going to be more difficule not to say anything and so what if they judged. If they do, I will know what kind of person they are.  I told the closest friends that I had hep and others that I had problems with my liver.  Everyone has been very kind. You have to focus on getting well.  I wish you the best. Take care

[Babydoll29]

Hello there!!
I'm new hew also. I don't have HCV- my Mother does.Um...
she found out she had it about four years ago. It can get bad at times when her ammonia levels get so high she doesn't know who she is or where she's at.(Sorry, I'm not trying to scare anyone.) I've heard that while other people have severe symptoms like my Mom, others on the other hand never even know they have it. Good luck to all of u and I think it's wonderful to have a place were we can go  for support.

[Forseegood]

hi, I think we can all relate to the feelings you have, I was diagnosed in 01 so I've known about this hitch-hiker, and have maybe had it around 27 years or so...when I was first diagnosed, I told almost everyone I knew (as far as friends, not people I work for and work with) but that might be because I have a really big mouth and I'm a bit of a dramaqueen...and I live in a very ultra-liberal place where there are many artists, etc..and many of us know someone who has it...

It's a free country, you tell who you want, or not...just remember, it's nothing to be ashamed of, I don't buy into all this shame stuff we have in most societies, as long as I'm a good person, and I try to help people, animals, etc...and I take care of myself and my own, I have nothing to be ashamed of...shame never solved anything anyway, action does...this is a disease, you didn't rob a bank...I feel the people who are the good, kind people in your life will stick by you, the others, well they've given you a good sign that you don't really need them in your life anyway...as far as family is concerned, sometimes they are much more understanding than we give them credit for...but do what makes you feel comfortable, this is your disease, not anybody elses and you'll deal with it the best you can I'd wager...this is a good place to go to let out your feelings, welcome....

[wyntre9]

It's a really tough call.

I told my boss (principal) coz I was applying for FLMA. I didn't have to say anything but wanted him to know why I was gonna be out in case I end up back in the same school.

I told the Human resources Dept. coz they had to have a physican's statement in order to approve leave.  (They're bound by law not to disclose that info.)

I told a couple of friends, maybe 3, and a couple of family members (none of whom live anywhere near me).

But as TX goes on I have to admit my world is shrinking.  With the few new people I come in contact with (I don't even get out of the house more than 2 or 3 days a week) I find I'm more reserved coz in the back of my mind is the all-consuming process of dealing with the virus.

I honestly don't know what I would have done had I not found this forum.

There's a Spanish proverb I always liked.

Mejor solo que mal accompanado.

It's better to be alone than to be around bad company.

[mauilady]

You can't beat a dead horse; you have HCV, you have to deal with it.  Period.  When I found out in August '06 that I had it (I've had it for 35 years), I said to myself: OK-- so what can I do about it?  I researched it, but didn't worry, not one bit.  Worry doesn't help matters.  And I laughed a lot!  I started Tx Jan 5th, and I'm still laughing, unless I'm having a particularly nasty bout with the Sx.  Tomorrow's another day, I keep reminding myself.  Hang in there, and DON'T WORRY!!

Aloha!

[tailao]

ya,people draw their own conclusions....some people can be nasty..I told several people and they were understanding at first but then i heard the gossip that went on behind my back....such as,"he must be gay because it is common amongst gays"...which is bs...some people are just trouble makers...I wouldnt tell anyone..

[SandyBreeze]

'do i or don't i'  

You may want to seek counseling.  Just reading your post it is obvious this is weighing on your heavily and your dialogue to us reveals your inner-dialogue.  You may need help in that area.  Whom you inform, is up to you.  However, anyone you have intimate contact with, please tell.  

I can't imagine having this disease on my 24/7, even daily.  Keep yourself active.  What time of physical activity do you have in your life?  Watch your thoughts.  I

I have lived with this virus well over 20 years, with just recently discovering it.  We make choices.  I would suggest if you cannot be content or find satisfaction in your life, to please seek counseling.   You deserve it.  You really do.

Breeze

[would-rather-be-riding]

You know "do-I-or-", anytime you think you are alone in this boat, just log into this forum.  These guys are wonderful folks.  I thank everyone of yall for your words. I consider you all good friends!  I talked openly in the beginning of my diagnosis last March, 06, (1a); now I really save stamps on Christmas cards---people dropped me like a hot potato!  I am about to start my firt tx, here in about 3 weeks.  My job I know will be a prob.  I think I am just going to say I have kidney problems or something like that--and have to take medicine.  If I say liver, someone may get wise.  I know I got God, and He'll never abandon me, and as one of the earlier posts state--better to be alone than with bad company!"

[MedoZero]

Dear My freind , i am also had Hep.c First i get scarred and i told ma family and ma close friend and my Girl >and also i felt lots of pain all over my right side >> after some monthes i tried to forget just to continue ur life as u used to be and when time will come ,, i just want from ALLAH to take my soul fast and make Death as a solution for me ...
Your Bro. Mohamed