Bad day :(

[skarey]

Hey everyone,
   I'm having a bad, emotional day today.   I'm getting so frustrated of feeling this way and having now answers.  I think I'm getting depressed now from all of this and my anxiety is kicking into full gear.  I'm really scared.  My body is trying to tell me something, and no one can understand.  It doesn't make it any easier that I am living in another Country away from family and American medical standards.  
  I feel like I have so many sx and new ones come up everyday.  I'm almost afraid to tell people how I am feeling and what I'm going through cause I think they think I'm crazy and annoying.  Even my husband was really supportive at first, but now I even feel like he is getting annoyed of me.  It makes it hard cause I sometimes feel so confused and hurt and feel that no one is really listening and taking me serious.  
    I ended up going to the dr again this morning for my bladder.  I've had a negative Urine test about 3 weeks ago, but thought I'd have anoher one done since I'm still having sx.  Of course it came back negative.   I know it's good to have negative tests, but I'm at the point now where I pray for a positive in hopes that it will help point to what is wrong with me.   I just want answers.    
    My brain fog is horrible.  I feel like I'm getting more stupid each day!  Seriously!   I can't think straight and am so forgetful and spaced out.  
  Anyways I just had to ramble.  Thanks for listening.   You have no idea how much I appreicate everyone's comments here!
   skarey

[Jena906]

I find this almost theraputic to know I'm not the only one feeling this way.  For to long I was all alone.  Thanks for checking back and answering these questions.  My family also thanks you as now I'm bouncing my thoughts off of you and they get a break.  :-)

[SOONERMOM]

I think we have all had days (months) like that!!

Patsy is right about these things will pass and you will make it through!!

I know it is easier said than done and I spent my share of moments worrying about it all, but after a while you do realize that it won't kill you and you will be ok.

It is much harder to be undiagnosed with all these weird symptoms.  When you get a diagnosis you can focus all your energy on treatment and getting better.

We understand and are here to listen!   I know family can only be SO understanding when they don't experience what you do.

[patsy10]

I have been in your almost exact same shoes.  The one thing that I can say is try to remember that these things always pass.  Yes it's something new every day or hour but they always seem to pass without taking us out.  The other thing that I always try to put in perspective is that many of the things we are experiencing like tingling, twitching, numb feelings are just sensory symptoms.  So even though they cause us great anxiety and fear they are just feelings and not actual loss of function.  

[skarey]

THANKS YOU GUYS!  I MEAN THAT FROM THE BOTTOM OF MY HEART!  

[gorbybelle]

I know exactly how you feel ,  I have had lots of days like you are having and when I am feeling o.k. and more optimistic I appreciate it so much, before all of this ? I took just feeling o.k. and doing day to day 'normal' things so much for granted.

A couple of things that helps on very bad days is just trying every trick in the book to relax - easier said than done I know BUT every little helps.

Deep breathing/hot baths [with epsom salts] , a massage [if I can persuade someone]
I know it sounds kinda feeble right now but try to do whatever it takes to slow your mind down - one of the best things for me is a good old cry!!  not self pity just a normal response to fear.  

I can be a tough old 'bird'!!  but letting-go a bit is sometimes so beneficial.  

This is a frustrating, frightening time the imagination can run wild - I am not saying it's all in your mind believe me , Iv'e been there and probably will be again as all of 'us' here have.

Post as much as you want someone here is listening.

I am against taking anti-depressants / anxiety meds.  but I have on occasion taken 'diazepam'  for anxiety and muscle spasms - one at bed time works quite well for me, it takes the edge of things.  Some people say 'diazepam' are very addictive but the way I use them isn't.  

I have felt a floating feeling when walking - I have no idea why though possibly just because I have felt so 'ill' and yet still managed to walk!!  I remember walking around walmart at the shopping mall feeling like I was on another planet to everyone else, a sort of buzzing in my upper body hard to explain.  

I have had times when I've been scared to wait anywhere public incase I collapsed or something.  

I also know what you mean about not wanting to mention another!! symptom.  I've had times I truly thought I was going mad.  Times I thought people will soon start avoiding me I have nothing other than my illness to talk about.

Angry, frustrated, sad, scared, hoping it's all a bad dream, etc;.......

here are some more  'hugs'

Remember post as much as you need to  

[Jena906]

I feel for you.  I was put through the old you look fine and all of your tests are within normal. BUT WHY do I FEEL like i'm dieing and losing my mind all at once.  Was I crazy? Nope, the 2 physcologist said find a md who will listen your mental state is fine it's your physical side that needs atention.  I hope you find a dr who will test for antibodies of lymes at an igenex lab.  This is what finally gave me a course to go after and I am getting results with treatment of antibiotic and finally I know just how sick I was. Which is a good thing that I feel that much better.  Please, if you have gone through all the other tests for MS look into the igenex labs.

[PlateletGal]

Hi ! I am so sorry to hear about what you are going through today and I pray that it will be temporary. One thing that helps me is to remember good times in the past, when I was healthy and to also think of all of the things I'm going to do when I'm finally able to.

If your depression and anxiety doesn't go away, please consider talking to your physician and treatment.

Lyme disease is nasty... but remember, your symptoms may only be temporary (one of my favorite words ; ^ )  )

Hugs,

~PlateletGal