What to do, what to do???

my 3 year old DD's been going to daycare for over 2 months now.  I've been thinking about changing her daycare only b/c there are some things that I'm not too fond of.  Here is my dilemma:  DD's already established friendship with 2 girls and speaks about them all the time.  I don't want her to go through getting used to the new place all over again.

Here are the reasons why I want to take her out:
1. DD tells me all the time that her daycare provider yells, pulls the kids by their shirts, and sometimes spanks (reportedly, she never hit DD)
2. they supposedly nap from 1-3:30 but DD doesn't go down for the night until 11 pm which is insane b/c she's gotta be up by 7 am.  when she was home, she'd nap from 1-3 and go down for the night at 9 pm
3. I see the way DD looks at her and it's not love that I see in her eyes.

I know that everything is pointing to "what the hell are you thinking?  change the daycare" but she already has friends there and she looks forward every morning to showing them her new outfit or telling them about something that we did over the weekend....WHAT DO I DO?????

[peekawho]

Have a talk with the daycare provider in a nice way, about your concerns.  

To me, your last point about DD not having love in her eyes towards the provider, gives the answer to the question.  

[Me2mommy2b]

Peek, I wouldn't say she "hates" her but I think she's afraid of her a little.  Her daycare provider is very strict with them and she doesn't keep it a secret.

I'm so lost.  She LOVES the kids there and talks about them all the time.  When I dropped her off this morning, everyone was jumping up and down calling her name and she joined them with a huge smile on her face.  Dh thinks that DD could use some discipline.

[kjbutcher]

she will love the kids at the next place too.  places do exist where she will like the kids and the provider.  I would look into switching BEFORE DD reports being one that is spanked.  if she is doing that, it is only a matter of time before it hits home.

[decogrl]

A professional daycare provider DOES NOT spank.  There are distractions, diverting attention, etc to control unwanted behavior.  Ameera has changed daycare providers and she lived through it..  She went through her most horrific behavior when she started this new one and now she is so well behaved, almost 100% potty trained and looks forward to going.  

I would pull Ariella out of  there.  She will adjust to a new place.

Ameera always goes down at nap time at school and is up by 3PM.  She goes to bed each night at 8:30 without a fight (I Will not go into the fact that she doesn't always sleep through the night--but we are getting better LOL!) A good place can really turn a kid around.  I am sorry but there is just no excuse for spanking.