lyme?

[humming4u]

everyone,
i just can't beleive the blessing of this new discussion on lyme.as just three weks ago my pcp finally said she wanted to test me for it.  this is almost three years into my health issues,manly pain and some nero too.i had a possiable/proable dx for awhile but then that was taken away after a neg spinal, and unchanged MRI.first had lesions but not exactly in all the right places.
i had thought i;d been tested, but no results were found in my monster of a chart.in the last three month symptoms have increased,and so has my need for more pain meds, which was,is, my main concern,and is what sent me to the pcp again. so i've been tested, and results were negative, but doc wants to send me to an infectious disease specialist.
It just so happens my friend is dating a man who is friends with the president of the international disease assoc., he has written 6 books, 640 articles,ect. hes a bit of a drive away,but this guy really wants to help with me seeing this doc.I'm so afraid to get my hopes up, but i know if he decides not to treat me,as in deciding its not whats wrong with me, bet he'll hook me up with a good nero,who,please, let him be of kind heart, along with very smart and good. the univercity hes at i looked up has many to choose from.
my research of lyme and its treatment has me very anxious.Quix, all you have written,has told me even more, thank you so much.
I haven't been in a hosiptal in years, and only to have my babies, and my friends, friend ,thinks his doc friend will admit me for all the testing, and I am feeling so frightened of that possiablity. and i'm discouraged of my fear.
I take alot of pain meds, my doc knows my struggle,and i'm frightened by what the hosiptal will think  and do reguarding these. I have become very dependant on them, and feel terrible when to much time goes by and they leave my system,i'm so ashamed. but my pain is very real too.
anyone have any thoughts on all this,postive ones i could grab hold of.I do see the ggod here, but its so clouded by all the rest.                                               thanks,humming

[humming4u]

thank you so much for all your words, they mean the world to me, coming from your educated and suffering self,with thanksgiving I promise to receive:) from all here on this forum.
right now i feel very stood by!
but as of this morning i no longer have access to that very good mind, as he declined to see me, as i don't meet his patient criteria.i cried all morning trying to understand why this had to be given to, and then taken away so easly.I wonder did he think for a moment that there is a human being in great need behind this favor being asked of him.
He said send her to a reumy,I've been to one.My friend said oh well, you probally need another nero visit anyway, yes, i know that.
Its just that so many things of lyme fit ,as did MS.
quix,do you remember our first talk about bilateral trigeminal neuralgia? I cannot get my pcp, or Np to consider or treat me for it, and i don't get a reason why.do you think a nero
would, even though the last one 1 1/2 years ago now, said no to MS,after a possiable due to my history(mother), and symptoms though mild, and a few areas to consider on a Mri, but nothing of intrest for Ms i think they said.
here i am in the same god awful pain, and very dependant on pain meds, almost three years now, life has crashed down, and i have nothing to say as to why, to all family and friends who wonder why i just can't do, oh, so many things.
its limboland i know,and know how very much company i'm in here, on this forum.
i was so strong, tiny but mighty the other nurses use to say.everything feels so hard today.                                                                humming

[Quixotic1]

Oh, I'm so sorry you feel caught and tortured by thinking constantly about your symptoms.  All I can say is that it is human and normal to think about what is attacking your body.  I also understand about not wanting the constant reminders that this forum gives about illness and symptoms, but hope you can use us for support and love.

Now, I, personally understand your feelings about needing pain relievers for pain and being dependent on them.  Please, please understand that being dependent is NOT at all the same as being addicted!!  It is so important to understand this and so few people do.  Any one who is taking narcotics every day for any reason is likely to become physically dependent to one extent or another.  This just means the body will show some withdrawal symptoms if the meds are stopped.  This is normal.  Do not ever be ashamed because of your need to relieve pain!  The shame is in this society's attitude toward pain and the meds used to relieve it.

An addiction is both a physiological and behavioral response in which the person constantly wants more and more med, plans ways to obtain this med, thinks constantly about obtaining this med and will do antisocial things to obtain it.  They use the med to satisfy a need other than the relief of pain.

Any more it is unusual to be admitted to the hospital for tests that are not surgical type tests (like Ada's bone marrow biopsy and node biospy)  Insurance typically won't pay for it.

The hospital cannot take your meds aways from you when you enter.  Many times they encourage you to bring your own to keep down costs.  I have been hospitalized several times over the last few years and I just brought my own meds.  They just ask you to let them know you are taking the ones you told them you are on.  When I need them I take my narcotic meds with me and take them as I need them.  So this is never a problem.

If the doctor does want to admit you ask, if instead, he can do the testing as an outpatient on successive days and maybe stay in a hotel or with someone close by.  

It sounds like you may now have access to a very good mind.  Feel happy about this and don't let your feeling about needing to relieve your pain interfere.  We'll stand by you and help support.

Okay?

Quix