suggestions on frustration

[funnyface69]

Hello everyone.  I am experiencing higher levels of frustration and anger.  It seems that my life is spiraling out of control and I can't do a thing sbout it.  The heat is making me much more aggitated than normal and so is anything stressful.  I thought I was over all the anger to my PPMS diagnosis but I guess I was wrong.  My son wanted to go to the pool the other day and I could not take him.  He got extremely mad at me and told me I am not the same mom.  I know he did not mean to hurt me.  He has ADHD, Bi-Polar, and is mildly MR.  But that comment made me realize just how much things have truly changed.  I know I am still his mom but I can not have fun with my kids the way I use to.  I feel guilty because of it.  I don't know how many of you if any are going through things similiar to this, but if you are or have, please give me some advice.  Maybe just knowing I am not the only one feeling this way would help. Oh, on another thread, someone asked me where I got the name funnyface.  It was the nickname my mom gave me when I waas a little girl.  SHe sang the song Funnyface to me every night by Donna Fargo.  It has stuck with me ever since.

[spastic]

Hi Sweetheart, I can relate to the family issues for sure.  I don't have MS but some kind of weird arthritis some Dr's calls Stll's and my other Dr's are not quite sure if thats right.  At first when I started getting sick, my kids barely noticed, I still could take them to games and other school functions but it soon became apparent to them that Mom could no longer get up the bleachers or to tired to sit through an all day tournament.  My son got angry and soon became embarassed by me and that hurt.  But then I started to see myself through his eyes and I understood how he could have those emotions towards me.

I had to sit him and my daughter down and my hubby and I talked to them about how my condition is affecting my life and theirs.  Just because I could no longer do the same things with them doesn't mean I didn't care about them or their activities.  I told them how much it depressed me that my disease took more things I love to do away from me.  So putting it out in the open for them to understand a little bit better has made life with my kids so much more do-able.  I now can laugh when they make fun of me trying to walk instead of crying my eyes out in my pillows.

It is so easy to get frustrated by our illnesses but we have to take a deep breath and take a step or two back.  I would explain to your son that having MS affects certain parts of your life but that you love him more than anything and that you miss doing those things too.  I know I say this a lot, but we and our families go through the grieving process when dealing with any chronic health condition.  There will be sadness, anger, isolation but the important thing is always to tell them you love them.  Eventually everyone will accept this.  But don't beat yourself up over this, this will just cause more anguish.

Hang in there Sweetie,

Ada

[Wobbly]

your not alone, I feel like I dissapoint everyone I know, my family, friends, my X co-workers, boss, husband....the list goes on and on..

it's very depressing at times...last night I just cried and cried...couldn't stop.  
after I saw my grandson, who is going to be adopted soon...I felt like he should be with me and my husband, but I can barely walk and he is a hyper three year old....

we love him and he loves us...but it isn't going to work....so I understand how you must feel with you child... don't be too hard on yourself...that what I tell myself..(hehe)...I know..it doesnt work for me either...

take care you are not alone, we are here for you....

Hugs
andie

[sllowe]

Morning!

Here with you Mama Funny-Face (thanks for sharing that memory w/your Mom w/us). I get feeling that I disappoint my kids, and I'm not even PPMS, just RRMS.  But, am limited at times.

The thing I was thinking of recently was maybe go speak w/someone with the kids and my husband too.  I was at a 'recently diagnosed seminar' earlier in the year, and thought I was not going to like it at all, until a woman came on who does individual and group therapy.  She said a lot of things that hit home to me.  For example she mentioned that the family would react, or not react, to the change in lifestyle as they have reacted to situations and problems in the past.

Oh man, could I relate to that.  We don't always discuss issues in my house (hubby and I - it's usually me doing the talking to the wall if you know what I mean) and when the dx came in, it was no different.

So, my thoughts are, wouldn't it be nice to hit this lady up, since she was pretty cool, and go and meet with her as a family.  Wonder if anyone else has done this w/a good outcome on the board.  If not w/MS, but any other medical conditions that the whole house feels........

ttys,
Shelly