My therapist told me that things I thought that I couldn’t do were “choices” that I made. E.g. I was not able to attend my brother’s wedding because I was in the hospital being treated for a stroke, hooked up to lines including morphine for terrible head pain. I had been paralyzed on one side, could barely speak, and couldn’t think about anything but my pain. But was it my choice that I decided not to go to my brother’s wedding? I told her it wasn’t a “choice”. She said that it was. That I suppose was to make me feel that I have more control in my life?
She also talked about being in the moment. She gave an example of holding an apple and thinking about all the hands that had handled the apple, from those picking it, transporting it, etc. I told her that was boring. I said so I’m supposed to only be in the moment cleaning up the kitchen and washing the dishes? I would rather be thinking of other things. She asked if that had worked for me. I said yes it had. Supposed to focus on eating which I now hate since my stroke? I would rather focus on anything else other than the food that I hate but have to eat. Supposed to be in the moment walking into the grocery store with a halting gait due to my stroke? If I really focus on the moment, I will focus on my constant pain from my fibromyalgia and migraines that I instead ignore as much as possible.
I sincerely want to hear if anyone else has used these 2 techniques to help their pain and disabilities. And how? Maybe the therapist just didn’t describe them well to me. Another therapist was also going to focus on being in the moment. Or what other methods have worked for people dealing with pain and/or disabilities?
P.S. I am fully aware of the moment when I walk outside and take in all the various senses or spend time with my husband for example. There is a lot of good in my life and I am happy a lot of the time.
I don't focus on my pain unless it gets terrible or I find that I cannot do something that I really wanted to do. Of course I could "choose" to do something and end up at the ER and set my progress back according to my neurologist. But these choices to not do something do not make me happy. And it's all the time that I can't do things. Travel is not possible for me. I couldn't fly last weekend with my husband to say good bye to a very dear friend who is now dead. I can barely go out socially. There is a lot of disappointment. So I still have a fair amount of grief, but don't feel that I am depressed--thanks to my anti-depressant.
Sometimes I am bedridden with horrendous pain from my migraines for days at a time. Or moderate pain for months at a time. That is difficult and I have no life during those times.
I was just looking for a better way to deal with my disappointments. I didn't find it. But I can live with it.
Thanks so much for your response. It was a psychologist that I met with. I told her towards the end of the appointment that I did not intend to see her again.
And I think that I am done with therapists. Another one also told me that she would focus on being in the moment.
I'll have to hear about some other kind of therapy that works better. On another medical site, a woman who is 43 years old wrote that she has a disease that gives her stroke after stroke which is robbing her of her memories. She will die soon from it. And she's had a terrible abusive childhood, but has learned to focus on in short--what is good in your life. I learned a lot more from her lengthy postings than I'm likely to get from a therapist.
Copyright 1994-2016 MedHelp International. All rights reserved.
MedHelp is a division of Aptus Health.
This site complies with the HONcode standard for trustworthy health information.
The Content on this Site is presented in a summary fashion, and is intended to be used for educational and entertainment purposes only. It is not intended to be and should not be interpreted as medical advice or a diagnosis of any health or fitness problem, condition or disease; or a recommendation for a specific test, doctor, care provider, procedure, treatment plan, product, or course of action. Med Help International, Inc. is not a medical or healthcare provider and your use of this Site does not create a doctor / patient relationship. We disclaim all responsibility for the professional qualifications and licensing of, and services provided by, any physician or other health providers posting on or otherwise referred to on this Site and/or any Third Party Site. Never disregard the medical advice of your physician or health professional, or delay in seeking such advice, because of something you read on this Site. We offer this Site AS IS and without any warranties. By using this Site you agree to the following Terms and Conditions. If you think you may have a medical emergency, call your physician or 911 immediately.