Aa
38, expecting in March, nervous, anxiety filled, Anyone in a similar situation?
Hi All,
Since learning that I am expecting, I have only joined two sites. This one seems a bit more "friendly". So I wanted to try to reach out to find others who may be expecting about the same month or in general, expecting their fist child at 35+. Just hoping to share/learn with others, as it has been a tough first trimester...a lot of stress that fell upon me after I found out I was pregnant. My BF and I are finally getting settled into a new place after over a mkonth of living in hotels...etc...due to mold that was discovered in our old rental. Added to that, I was sick everyday...no appitite and VERY depressed, filled with anxiety...also weaning off of anxiety meds. (Successfully off of one, last week of taking the other)
So, I won't write a novel...but it's been difficult to try to remain focused on only positives, with arguing between my BF and I...I have us in couples therapy now, it was something I told him we needed to do in order to try to be as healthy emotionally as we can for this baby. it has helped a bit, but he's slow at the process, he is very set in his ways, and its taken him some time to realize that all of the arguing and stress filled nights because HE wants things to be a certain way, HIS way...have not helped us, only hurt us. Trying to repair damage done to our relationship in past couple months, hard but I think now, for me...I have to remain committed. I have focused on "alternatives" for too long now, I need to try to remain as positive as possible with no meds now.
Want the crying to be less, the fear to be less and hoping that I feel happier as this new month goes on.
Thanks in advance for anyone who feels comfortable sharing their situations, experiences with me.
It's been SO nice to read about women over 40 having healthy pregnancies and all turning out ok, as I am getting a "late" start at having my first...and think about the future. I actually shouldn't say "late start"...it's all relative I guess.
Thank You!
Pawprints4ever :)
Since learning that I am expecting, I have only joined two sites. This one seems a bit more "friendly". So I wanted to try to reach out to find others who may be expecting about the same month or in general, expecting their fist child at 35+. Just hoping to share/learn with others, as it has been a tough first trimester...a lot of stress that fell upon me after I found out I was pregnant. My BF and I are finally getting settled into a new place after over a mkonth of living in hotels...etc...due to mold that was discovered in our old rental. Added to that, I was sick everyday...no appitite and VERY depressed, filled with anxiety...also weaning off of anxiety meds. (Successfully off of one, last week of taking the other)
So, I won't write a novel...but it's been difficult to try to remain focused on only positives, with arguing between my BF and I...I have us in couples therapy now, it was something I told him we needed to do in order to try to be as healthy emotionally as we can for this baby. it has helped a bit, but he's slow at the process, he is very set in his ways, and its taken him some time to realize that all of the arguing and stress filled nights because HE wants things to be a certain way, HIS way...have not helped us, only hurt us. Trying to repair damage done to our relationship in past couple months, hard but I think now, for me...I have to remain committed. I have focused on "alternatives" for too long now, I need to try to remain as positive as possible with no meds now.
Want the crying to be less, the fear to be less and hoping that I feel happier as this new month goes on.
Thanks in advance for anyone who feels comfortable sharing their situations, experiences with me.
It's been SO nice to read about women over 40 having healthy pregnancies and all turning out ok, as I am getting a "late" start at having my first...and think about the future. I actually shouldn't say "late start"...it's all relative I guess.
Thank You!
Pawprints4ever :)
hi dear , i am having mine in march also , she is my second child, i am 36 and had my first one at 34 , never is late , when ur ready , that is a good time, nice to see u here and welcome to peregno club :)
Thank you for your comment and welcome :)
I actually like it much better here than babycenter...there were a lot of negative people it seemed there. Now is a time where positivity is the only way to go as far as replies to others. (in my opinion)
Congrats to you! Do you have a girl or boy? You said "She" so I assume you already found out what you are having?
Thanks again!
I actually like it much better here than babycenter...there were a lot of negative people it seemed there. Now is a time where positivity is the only way to go as far as replies to others. (in my opinion)
Congrats to you! Do you have a girl or boy? You said "She" so I assume you already found out what you are having?
Thanks again!
thanks , yeah i did a blood test and found out that it is a she, :), actually u will find some negative and rude people here too , they are every where, do u know what are u having?
Hi. Congrats! I had my first at 34, a girl & will turn 38 by time my new little bundle comes around Jan 25! I have shared custody with my first with my ex. This baby was a pleasant surprise, my man was told it was unlikely he could hav children, he's 38, his first. Best wishes
Welcome. I love this sight and am on it daily. Congrats on your pregnancy. Prayers that everythingworks out for you and your b/f. I am 37 and 30 weeks pregnant with my 3rd child. A girl we have decided to name Zoey Camden. Again, welcome. And congrats on the baby!
Thanks to ALL of you for the well wishes, congrats and prayers.
I am truly hoping for some clarity ASAP, as this week seems to be getting a bit more difficult for me. I couldn't sleep at all last night, mostly due to my brain not resting...too many worries, fears, anxiety in full affect and I still don't feel "secure" in that my BF is REALLY "getting" that I am struggling emotionally and wish he'd be more focused on just laughing and smiling with me...but that's not him lately...maybe it never was and it took all this stress in past two months to actually see it.
People keep telling me NOT to make any major decisions now, because of pregnancy hormones and the increased depression/sadness that I feel...however I should be enjoying this time in my life, not feeling like I feel each day. I had mentioned in first post that we are in couples therapy which I practically forced him into and SHE is even having a difficult time "getting through" to him.
I question if I can already predict the future for us, or if I am just that depressed that I don't see a solution. However, my personal therapist is in contact with our couples therapist and I can read between the lines and see that they are both concerned about HIS emotional state. He is NOT the "ideal" personality for therapy, what I mean is he has a VERY hard time taking criticism of any kind from anyone...and almost always immediately has a quick reaction that is not always calm. He reacts before really thinking, and although he is book smart, he seems to lack the ability to look in the mirror and really see what he needs to work on. (I am not talking psychically, I mean emotionally/mentally) He's quick to judge me, but lacks insight to be able to look at himself.
Anyhow, he is not all bad, but I am done making excuses for anyone in life, he's hurt me so much emotionally in the past two months that I literally can not stop wondering what the future will hold. People don't change unless they think they have an issue, and so far, he seems to think that I have all the issues. Thankfully the therapists is there once a week to remind him of all of this. Yet, I don't think he truly walks out feeling differently.
Enough about him.
To lisa1905, I had the MaterniT21 blood test done and found out I am having a boy. They say it's as accurate as it can get so unless the ultrasound proves otherwise...BOY it is. I worry that he's already stressed out, I wonder how my stress filled body and mind has affected him already and can't help but worry a lot about this. I try not to argue back with my BF for that reason, don't want him "hearing" it all if this early, that's possible.
I always wanted to bring a child into the world in a calm, healthy situation and am beyond upset that I seemed to have misjudged what my BF would be like.
Gosh, I am talking about him again. UGH.
Anyway, I have had new pains in my sides and stomach in past two days, I am assuming its normal, nothing that is unbareable...so hopefully it's just my muscles or body expanding and is not anything to get concerned about.
I will try to post each day or at least every other day.
I thank you all again for the comments.
CONGRATS to you ALL! :)
Sincerely,
Pawprints4ever
I am truly hoping for some clarity ASAP, as this week seems to be getting a bit more difficult for me. I couldn't sleep at all last night, mostly due to my brain not resting...too many worries, fears, anxiety in full affect and I still don't feel "secure" in that my BF is REALLY "getting" that I am struggling emotionally and wish he'd be more focused on just laughing and smiling with me...but that's not him lately...maybe it never was and it took all this stress in past two months to actually see it.
People keep telling me NOT to make any major decisions now, because of pregnancy hormones and the increased depression/sadness that I feel...however I should be enjoying this time in my life, not feeling like I feel each day. I had mentioned in first post that we are in couples therapy which I practically forced him into and SHE is even having a difficult time "getting through" to him.
I question if I can already predict the future for us, or if I am just that depressed that I don't see a solution. However, my personal therapist is in contact with our couples therapist and I can read between the lines and see that they are both concerned about HIS emotional state. He is NOT the "ideal" personality for therapy, what I mean is he has a VERY hard time taking criticism of any kind from anyone...and almost always immediately has a quick reaction that is not always calm. He reacts before really thinking, and although he is book smart, he seems to lack the ability to look in the mirror and really see what he needs to work on. (I am not talking psychically, I mean emotionally/mentally) He's quick to judge me, but lacks insight to be able to look at himself.
Anyhow, he is not all bad, but I am done making excuses for anyone in life, he's hurt me so much emotionally in the past two months that I literally can not stop wondering what the future will hold. People don't change unless they think they have an issue, and so far, he seems to think that I have all the issues. Thankfully the therapists is there once a week to remind him of all of this. Yet, I don't think he truly walks out feeling differently.
Enough about him.
To lisa1905, I had the MaterniT21 blood test done and found out I am having a boy. They say it's as accurate as it can get so unless the ultrasound proves otherwise...BOY it is. I worry that he's already stressed out, I wonder how my stress filled body and mind has affected him already and can't help but worry a lot about this. I try not to argue back with my BF for that reason, don't want him "hearing" it all if this early, that's possible.
I always wanted to bring a child into the world in a calm, healthy situation and am beyond upset that I seemed to have misjudged what my BF would be like.
Gosh, I am talking about him again. UGH.
Anyway, I have had new pains in my sides and stomach in past two days, I am assuming its normal, nothing that is unbareable...so hopefully it's just my muscles or body expanding and is not anything to get concerned about.
I will try to post each day or at least every other day.
I thank you all again for the comments.
CONGRATS to you ALL! :)
Sincerely,
Pawprints4ever
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