How early to fly with a newborn?

[slippinandsliddin]

This is still a-ways away- but my partner would like me to attend his daughter's graduation (who is just shy of adulthood) less than 2 weeks after my due date. The family is already searching for airfare- etc ... as we won't be the only one's making the trip. (Yes, they are also talking about driving - which we would need to leave a few days sooner.) This event will be many states away- from one end of the US to the other. Unfortunately we have not been able to spend alot of time with his dd (for me- probably 21 days in the last 2 yrs.) for various reasons- but we have wanted to/tried/ and filed all the necessary legal paperwork- long story

I guess I just feel that under the circumstances I would rather stay home- watch a home movie of the event and send a nice gift- but I also feel terrible- as we have wanted/tried to spend time with her. (The event will also mean being around other people that I don't necessarily enjoy being around as they have caused us great stress/drama- and we have had to call in law enforcement ... yikes.)

I am also not sure how soon would be safe for ME if I have to have a C-section???

I also get worried with all the flu/immunizations-etc. I will talk with my Dr/pediatrician- but I really think under a month ... I know the airlines also require (possibly) that you have a birth certificate- and I doubt that I would have it in that time frame. Now I feel guilty- like I am making excuses- but I am just trying to make a reasonable decision. I have not mentioned any of these things to my partner- yet. I know he will be disappointed- I know he wants his dd to see the baby- but thankfully she will be an adult ... so hopefully we WILL se more of her.

There is NO way that I will go if we are driving. But how early would a reasonable parent fly with their newborn? (Thank you)

[slippinandsliddin]

Yes, in a way it would be safer. BUT - there is no way I would go in the rental car- there would be 5 of us total- as we would go with others- and no way will I travel that long- a couple of days- I think it is 1,000 miles. They were talking about having X amount of driver's and driving straight thru- as to not have to take off more work- but I dont think I am into that either- ewe.

Thanks so much.

[Victoria01]

I agree with the other ladies. It would actually be safer because of the flu, to drive there if at all possible. I know you said you didn't want to, but it would be best for baby if you still wanted to go.

[adgal]

I agree with Meli as well....I personally won't fly with my baby until at least summer and we see a decline in flu, etc.  

[PamelaBee]

Ditto to what Melimeli said!

[dot247]

I would wait on that one! what if you are late? only 2 weeks after giving birth is a bit soon not only for the baby but for you as well.  I was still in a bit of c-section pain 2 weeks later, not alot but I would not want to be stuck on a plane.  It is also an emotional time for you as well.  My daughters first flight was at 4 months, we went to England to visit my husbands family.  The flight was long but my daughter slept the entire way in a small cot attached to the blukhead.  Good luck with your decision! I think your partner will understand besides no matter where you go there is someone who thinks they have the right to touch your baby.  I hated that!

[Helen72]

Our pedi recommended taking our dd out only at 2 months and exposing her to other kids after 3 months.

[Maca726]

I can just imagine the feelings you are dealing with but you have to think of yourself and your new baby first. I am like you trying to please others and it is not always good. As my friend tells me; we have to be selfish sometimes. Two weeks after your due date is too early not only for the baby but also for you. It was tougher than I thought when I came home with my daughter and boy would I have loved having my mom with me.
No, you are not making excuses, you are being totally reasonable and your partner needs to understand. Not only would I not fly I would not have visitors for the first 4-6 weeks...if I had another baby. Especially now with all the viruses... And like you said, your partner's daughter can always come and meet your baby later...
Take care and all the best.

[melimeli]

I wouldn't do it if I were you... imagine with all the swine flu.. stuck on an airplane with a newborn with low defences and the recycled air..  Just stay home, send a nice gift and maybe give her airfare out to visit you all for a gift... set up a time for the future, even though dp maybe disappointed... you are the mama bear and have to protect your little one