Ease my mind?

[wanting4#1]

I want to start by saying that I know that I am crazy, but most people are and at least, I recognize it ;)

Okay, now...I'm feeling good today....sore bbs; no cramping, but some pulling/tightening in various places throughout my abdomen; tired, but in good spirits.

The doctor's office called and said that my TSH was VERY good, considering the pregnancy...and I wish she hadn't added that part. So, I asked her if it NOT being high enough was a bad sign and she said absolutely not.....

Here's the craziness...I'm terrified that this is going to be an ectopic pregnancy. I have no reason to think it is; I've never had one; I don't fit any of the categories of high risk for one (except that there's some studies that indicate older women might have one, but they didn't define older...is 37 older????)

Is the beta being at 346 a good sign that it isn't an ectopic? I know that there are no guarantees in this process and I've certainly been on here long enough, read enough stories and know enough people's situations to know that ANYTHING can happen and I am trying so hard not to be that woman who thinks it will all happen to me....but it's like I'm waiting for the other shoe to drop! I still can't believe this is really happening. I'm terrified that as soon as I tell my parents, I will miscarry (that happened the last miscarriage...I was on a camping trip with my whole family and I told them all and then miscarried that afternoon...it was awful!)

I know that I am being irrational, but I guess I just want some hand-holding right now and you guys are the best hand-holders I know!! :)

Thanks.....

[adgal]

You and I can go to the insane asylum for those in first trimester together.  However, you are not crazy.  Our fears are based on our own experiences, and when you have had even one, let alone multiple miscarriages, this whole first trimester is terrifying. We analyze every number, every conversation with our Dr.'s and nurses, even the tone of their voice. Symptoms, or lack their of can wreck havoc with our minds.  It's insane!!! Etopic is really a miscarriage, and it's pretty natural you would be afraid of it.  I have never had an Etopic either, and when my numbers yesterday didn't come back they way I expected, it was the first thought in my head as well.  One of the reasons this forum works so well is that the majority of us have had some sort of problem with a pregnancy, or just trying to get pregnant.  That makes it a safe place to express ourselves, as it's sometimes difficult for those in our "real" lives to understand how truly scared we can be at times.  I panic over absolutely every little thing, and in every other aspect of my life, I am an incredibly positive person.  Here is what I tell myself (although I am not the best at taking my own advice..lol). Every day I stay pregnant reduces the odds of a loss.  Every day is a victory!!  We are here to support you.  I can tell you I would not still be trying if it wasn't for this forum, I think I would have given up a long time ago.  You are going to do this my friend, it's going to happen!!!  Lots of hugs, Amanda

Oh, and Rachel, I thought you promised ME the pink one.....lol. Lisa, won't we be cute in our little matching straight jackets...ha!!!!

[wanting4#1]

This is just one of the many reasons that I love this site...you guys are so wonderful! I've said it before, but I'll say it again...SUPER BEST!!!

Rachel, you made me laugh out loud, which I really needed. I am flip-flopping between irritation and tears so fast that I'm wearing myself out!!! ;)

I LOVE PINK! I'll be sure to order that color when the straight jacket is required. (I'm so nuts that I could make myself crazier just by THINKING about being in one of those gosh-awful contraptions!!)

Hugs to all!
Lisa

[rdh1981]

It's time to order the straight jacket!!! lol Just kidding, your beta is great, the pulling/tightening feeling is very  normal!! Say it with me it is NOT Ectopic!

I am not going to tell you to relax, because I belong in the Looney Bin myself!!!! It is perfectly natural to fear the worst. Mainly because many of us have sadly been through the worst. Just try to relax and keep squeezing your boobies! : )  

After you see the heartbeat you will relax and then new craziness will start!! Sit back, try to relax and man oh man pace yourself, you have 9 looooooooooong months to go crazy!!!

By the way I have a pink straight jacket and I love it!! he he he You know I kidding right???

Rachel

[pcarsey]

Lisa, I will hold your hand any day you need! 346 is a great beta! They have to start somewhere don't they? Just think positive and don't stress over wondering if this is going to be an ep! It isn't! You have waited long and patiently for this! This is going to be the one! Good Luck! Keep me posted! And to me.. the pulling tightening is a great thing! That baby is implanting really good in your uterus and making it a home for the next 9 months!

Congrats again!
Patty