Partner registered recently on dating sites

[suzanna40]

I am going a bit crazy here, I'm still pregnant despite complications and have now just found that my partner had registered on dating sites back in early January.  He doesn't seem to be using them as such and we have a 'jokey' relationship about things and there's no jealousy with regards to other people, past relationships etc so I am unsure of what to think.  

I am upset about, he is away at the moment and I won't see him for a week (visiting his daughter).  I don't believe he is seeing someone else or even wants to, but I'm annoyed that he has done this and can't understand even for a laugh why he would.  Am I being unreasonable?  I need to get some perspective as this is going to fester all week until I see him, so any thoughts from anyone would be helpful - many thanks.

[melimeli]

how did you find out?  my friend was married and found out that he was dating poeple he met o  personal ad sites... bad news.. red flag, count your blessing and bow out..

[PamelaBee]

Sorry, but what other intent would he have to register on dating sites...to browse, curiosity?  However you answer, he still registered and is interested in seeing what's out there.  That would be a RED flag to me.  If you say you have a "jokey" playful, cutesy-non-jealous relationship, you wouldn't even be posting to see what others think, right?  With a child on the way, and your partner on the prowl putting himself out there--I would confront him and see what his intentions are.  Sooner than later, because once your baby is here...it's a whole other story.  Best of luck to you!

[suzanna40]

Thank you for all your responses.  Just so you know Shuga my partner's daughter lives abroad and I have no issues at all with him going to see her.  I am unable to fly at the moment and he went with my blessing and I even booked the flights.  Its good to know that I am not the only one thinking this is out of order.  I am a pretty broad-minded person and am old enough now to not worry about petty jealousies, but felt that his behaviour is expecting far too much from me if he thinks that this is non issue.  

I am going to ponder on what action to take over the next few days and in the meantime I am trying to ensure that no matter what bump and I are ok.  Be in no doubt ladies, thanks to your support I realise that his behaviour is NOT ON and he WILL know this on his return.  It will be my decision then as to whether I feel I can trust him in the future and what to do with our relationship.  I am just so sad and disappointed that things have come to this.  I haven't mentioned this to any of my friends or family so I am so grateful for your support.   Thanks again.

[kellym]

I don't find any humor in your partner registering on an online dating site.  If he's looking for a laugh, perhaps he should go to a comedy show.
Sounds like your relationship has been on the rocks for a bit now and I would confront him NOW.  I know that you are looking for validation for your feelings and you've got it.
As if you haven't had enough to deal with in the last few weeks, this is enough to be the straw to break the camels back.
Take care of yourself. Don't let him get away with measly excuses either. He comes off the site or I'd walk!  So sorry you are having to deal with this amongst all the other probs!

[shuga1109]

I agree. In no way, shape, or form would I allow my partner to register on dating sites. I am not a jealous person and we might have questions that may need answered, from time to time, but we trust each other (most of the time) and would never allow that. I am not, however, naive and neither should you. Also, my partner would never leave me, pregnant, alone. He would have taken me to go with him to see his child, especially for one week. My opinion is, that is he is a man, on a dating site, you are pregnant with complications, you allow this, so the end result might be, he's going to cheat. Im sorry. That's just my opinion. I hope its not the case, but reality is.... dating sites are to pick up and/or meet other women and men. Love yourselfenough to tell yourself that this is not acceptable and wont happen again as long as you're in this relationship!  There is a new baby coming, and you have to make sure that you and the baby are ok first. Im sorry to say it this way.

[Azwoman]

ok.so are you two monogamous and an actual couple? And he's on dating sites? I've had this happen to me and this is suspicious and I ended a short courrtship when I found out that the lying cheating scoundrel had a couple of ads up. If his marital status says single and he's not mentioning being in a relationship, dump him. The internet is making it so easy for guys to cheat today. There is NO excuse to have personal ads except to meet other women. Sorry to be the bearer of bad news. Hope you're doing ok.

[AnnieBrooke]

I don't understand why he would think it is a laugh to register on online dating sites.  Reading someone else's silly posts to each other might amuse some people, but it would lose its interest quickly, it wouldn't really be that entertaining.  To up the ante and post oneself, just because it would be 'a laugh,' doesn't make a lot of sense.  He registered only a month and a half ago when you were already pregnant?  It sounds like he was registering in earnest, myself.