He wants anal sex but I do not. I don't want to loose him...

[chattypatti]

My boyfriend has expressed how much he likes anal sex and how it has been an impotant part of his sex life.  The problem is, I have never liked it.  It is uncomfortable for me and I don't feel it is necessary.  When I tell him that I dont want to do it, he tells me that he would be gentle and do it properly where it wont be painful.  He thinks that if I just gave it a try that I would really like it.  He's getting this idea because other women he has dated would do anal intercourse with him and liked it.  Also, he has a very large penis.  It was difficult enough to take it in my vagina much less the thought of it in my a$$.  He says he just cant understand why I would deny myself such pleasure.  The subject has stressed me out so much that I cant enjoy our relationship.  He is a very loving, affectionate and supportive man so everything except the anal subject has been wonderful.  The affection he gives is not something I've gotten from most men I've dated in the past and it's hard to give that up but at the same time, I dont think anal intercourse is something he is willing to give up either.  I don't know what to do.  Any advise?

[lindsay466]

I'm a woman,28 and have to say that I have always let the guy I was with put it in there. And it's not as bad as these ladies say,as long as the lady taking it relaxes and pushes out. And as far as the but "not being designed" for anal sex why do guys always check out my pert sexy butt as I walk by. They obviously want to put it in there that's part of being a guy!!! If he doesn't ask maybe the girl is overweight and the guy has no desire to put it in there. And hence why the women that don't do it all have boyfriend not husband's
I'm married 4 yrs so far and my husband loves having anal with me and I give him bjs whenever he is horny to mix it up and we never have fights about anything and keep him very happy!!! That lead's me to think he would never cheat! Why should he??? He gets everything he wants at home!!!

[Info4u]

I definitely agree with your comment. Sometimes, I do not even understand how people measure and figure out  a person's goodness.
1. The anus is not originally designed for  sexual intercourse.
2. If you are not satisfied with natural and original things, you will never be satisfied with unnatural and fake things. Anal sex is no less than Sodomy and you are absolutely right to deny it. Do not compromise with the idea. From your explanation, for your friend, your anus is much more important than your mind and feeling. If he insists on telling you the same, it is a good opportunity for you to decide.

Good luck!

[TTinKKerBBell]

EXCELLENT idea, SpecialMom!!   Personally, I'm BIG on not asking something of ANYONE that You would not do YourSelf.  Course, He says He WOULD if His Wife had a penis but since She doesn't have one, we don't REALLY REALLY know, if He REALLY  REALLY would.

Fragutz,
Many of us have expressed an opinion on Your Wife's behalf whether or not they partipate.  Your Wife doesn't have to DO this before She can decide if She WANTS it.  It truely is mentally a turn off for many with good reason and with reasonable thought.  The biggest sex organ is the brain.  Erections AND desire originate in the brain.   This appeals to You on a MENTAL level - it's UNappealing to Her on a MENTAL level.  

[specialmom]

Ya know, I posted other things and you didn't even respond to that so one must wonder what you came here for.  You wanted to argue?  anyway, good luck--------  I suspect that this issue is just the tip of your intimacy ice burg.  

[Fragutz]

As i was so very sure u ladies would say that, i clearly stated that if it woudl bring her pleasure i would accept. As far as i know tehre is no link between a dildo and my wife's body so there would definitely be no pleasure for her.
Hmm but maybe some for me .. who knows ...
I never forced my wife in to doing it so i see no relevance in your post.
Seeing how chattypatti is no longer reading this, and that most women here, as usual, see only what they want and not the whole context, also that i don't want to convince anybody of anything, i don't see any reason for me keep posting.
I will keep reading in case someone else writes something useful.
Have a great life.

[specialmom]

Ha, well I have an idea.  Your wife can buy an 'instrument' that she straps on and use it on you so that you can go first and tell her it is not so bad.  Just an idea.