It's so wrong but it feels so good......

[nunchaku]

Okay so if you read some of my others posts you can see that I'm pretty damn crazy. Lol. This post is about my attraction/strong emotional connection with my favorite teacher. I'll sum up this relationship.
-I'm a 16 year old girl in high school, never had a boyfriend
-My teacher is a 28 year old female
-I'm straight
-I want to be with my teacher all the time even if I don't talk to her
-I think she's physically attractive (despite me being straight)

And a bit of background info because this is very contradicting!
-I am terrified of women molesters (mature women who have sexual intentions toward younger girls, which in my fear would be me.)
-I get afraid when I get too close to any mature woman besides my family because of this fear/trauma.

Weird how I have that traumatic fear, yet I am still able to feel an attraction to a mature female???

Anyway, I just have to get this off my chest but the other day we were working on projects in class and every time my teacher came to ask my group a question she would look at me for an answer, even though my other group members were around. She only looked at me. Then she offered us glue and my friend said that she wanted to use the glue, but when my teacher came to give it to us she stood over top of me/behind me (I was sitting on the floor) and as she was handing me the glue we made skin contact. I wasn't complete aware of what was happening but I felt her touch my shoulder blade and arm. As creepy and weird as this sounds, I liked it. I know she probably does not have any freaky intentions toward me because she's not that kind of person but I sometimes like to think that's the way it is. Just a part of my fantasies. =P

Any thoughts?

[nunchaku]

I don't want another girl to take ny heart lol I'm straight. I like boys.

[teddybears4ever2]

I'm a girl, and I had 2 teachers I liked when I was in high school. It was very hard to have to sit and stare at them all class long.  I seem to recall that one of them got married, got his girl pregant, and then she got kidnapped, but dhe was ok.  That situation resolved itself after that. I'm not saying that something like this has to happen.  In time some other girl might take your heart.

[specialmom]

Yes.  You know ---------  your whole life you will have thoughts and fantasies and things that pop into your head that are inappropriate.  It just happens and always will.  Don't think too much of it and redirect your thoughts.  Glad you are focused on school and see that is most important.  
Good luck

[nunchaku]

I only fantasize when I have nothing better to do and when my emotions go wack; school work has always been my top priority and it takes a lot to get me away from it... also, I definitely do not allow my feelings to show. Ever. The last thing I would ever want is for that teacher to lose her job. I know I'll get over this eventually.

[specialmom]

I agree with Teko and just suggest you focus on  your school work so that you can get into a good college.  

And a friend of mine who is a male quit teaching all together because female students came on to him . . . he knew it would be horrible to ever act on any of it and didn't appreciate the teens trying to tempt him.  He was in his 20's and very good looking and teens with fantasies made him uneasy at his job.  He just wanted to teach and coach.  Most teachers feel this way and your fantasies and thoughts are not something they want you to have.  

Anyway, focus on the work at hand and being successful academically.

[teko]

Yup, sounds like the crazy, thoughts, fantasys of the typical teenager. Dont worry, it has a tendency to work it self out as you get older. I remember having a crush on my teacher too, except it was a he and I used to sit and right Mrs. and his last name all the time at my desk, till I got caught. How totally embarrassing.

So, of course when I was your age if it had been a woman I was attracted to, that could have really gotten me into trouble. just sayin,,,, different times. They was still harpin on young girls dating guys with deeper tones of skin back then.