I am scared of my boyfriend not being faithful

[JakeS24]

Where to start... My bf and I have been together for almost two years. We have had some problems especially this past year. I found him on multiple chat sites talking to guys in ways that hurt me very much. He says he wouldn't do it anymore and for the past couple of months i haven't found anything. But i do know he is constantly looking at porn. It makes me feel horrible inside that he is always doing that. I feel i am not good enough or something. I just don't understand why he has to look at people having sex all the time or just guys nude in general. He even does it when i am several feet away from him. On top of it i always worry he is doing something behind my back as in talking to other people or being on sites he should not be on but i have zero proof. He is all that i have and i care for him very very much. I just feel so alone sometimes. Can anyone relate?

[Nighthawk61]

If it were me Jake, and my partner was doing all those things, and it would make me feel the same way you do, i would just know in my heart that this was not the right relationship for me.

I'm so sorry, i know how hard it is to make a change, when you are a loving caring individual ready for commitment. It hurts a great deal. But it is worth ending something that is going nowhere. You don't need to worry if you can find the right guy, YOU WILL. Take your time, and look after yourself, and you'll find the right partner. One thing for sure, a better match is out there, right now., thinking about you, and wondering when it will happen for you both. When you are otherwise engaged, you cannot go to him. You cannot hope to meet him.  Even if you do, it will be very uncomfortable because you'll be on the rebound if you have to get out of this current thing quickly to make it work with someone new.

Maybe it's time for you to go to a therapist , do it for yourself, and if you and your therapist decide to offer therapy to you both as a couple, deal with that then. First, talk out loud about what's going on . Find the right therapist that will support you moving forward. You're worth it. I promise you, there's a good match out there for all of us, No, it doesn't always happen first time out of the gate, it sometimes takes us years to find it , (as it did for me) but it was oh so worth the wait.

I hope you feel better having found us here. I hope to hear more from you.

[specialmom]

Hm, this seems to be an ongoing, long term issue.  Is it time to re evaluate if you want to stay in this relationship?  

[TTinKKerBBell]

Actually, instead of answers to Your question(s) here, I have a few questions for You.

Why do You want to be with someone

1.   who goes on "multiple chat sites talking to guys in ways that HURT YOU VERY MUCH"  ??

2.  He's "constantly looking at porn and it makes You feel HORRIBLE inside"  ??

3.  You "feel You're not GOOD ENOUGH or something"  ??

4.  You "just don't UNDERSTAND why He has to look at people having sex all the time.....or just guys nude in general"  ??

4.  You "ALWAYS worry He is doing something behind Your back"  ??

One more question:

and You love Him why ????