Question of the month!!

[specialmom]

Hello!!  So here is a poll to see which element of a relationship people think is MOST important.  Sure, all are important but which is most important to YOU:

POLL:  What is most important to you in your relationship with a significant other?

[MH Community Mgr]

Although the poll is closed   Everyone is welcome to continue answering this thread, as well as look for new questions each month!

Best,

Cheryl
MedHelp

[VICourageous]

Thank You! I do need to move on a bit and step into other areas besides "Addiction" These areas will help me move along in my recovery too! Thanks to looking at your profile I found this one!! Now I can follow you too!!
Bless

[specialmom]

ViCourageous---  Welcome to the forum!!  I hope you come and share with our posters when you can!  28 years of marriage is a LONG time---  you probably have much to offer those trying to figure out their own relationships here.

Agreed, it does take all of these things.  I was trying to think of the one that I had to have and it really is hard to narrow it down, isn't it?  

Anyway, thanks for posting and hope to see you around more!

[VICourageous]

Hi specialmom. I have been trying to branch out into other community's lately. I just found this one due to your reply on that post.Ha!!
I have been married going on 28 years and He is my Best Friend. To me it takes work, communication,respect, understanding and Honesty! All of the above is all intertwined too!
Bless
Thanks

[specialmom]

Well said unsureMS.  

[UnsureMS]

For me understanding is my choice. Yes all the others are important but issues will arise. Sometimes you may not feel fully respected but their significant other. Other times the money may not be there for what you need. If your significant other falls so k the sex drive may not be there. And so forth I guess you can get the point.

But when issues do arise you will have to communicate and then both of you will have to be understanding of the others feelings. So, my choice is understanding of each other. For without a good understanding of where your loved one stands you may let small issues bug you.

[specialmom]

I want to thank everyone for participating in the poll.  It's been really interesting!  I'll be coming up with the question of the month in July very soon!

[NOHARD]

Hi Mom, Respect all the way from that comes every thing you can ask for, even resecting one and others space, in the UK I matched fished, this was my space, me doing that gave my wife her space, with my daughter gave them space, so we respected one and others space.
This makes a good marriage, and still does today.
Good Luck

[phix95]

Respect

[hero65]

i think you're right. honestly i think all the above points are important but i think having the ability to communicate is the most important because any problem can be solved when you talk to each other.

[nursegirl6572]

I think love is an understood.  It's kind of expected that a romantic relationship is going to involve love.

The question is more about components of life that people think are the most important in their relationship.  I think love is a given in all...it should be anyway.

Just my two cents.

[hero65]

i was surprised love wasn't one of the possibilities ...

[nursegirl6572]

Great poll SM.  It's interesting to see what's important to individual people!

[Londres70]

There is NO way to pick one as they all in combination make one, great marriage.  

“The whole is greater than the sum of its parts.”

― Aristotle

[AnnieBrooke]

The one I COULD live without is the great sex, if all else were there.  Maybe my husband would feel differently.  lol

[specialmom]

Interesting thoughts from all!  Yes, Ideally, I want them all.  Some come and go but I was trying to think of which one I couldn't live without . . .  still debating this with myself!

[Life360_Dave]

To me financial security is the most important. Sitting around the house with a foreclosure notice on the door, no food in the fridge, no cloths on the backs, no funds to fix the car, constant struggling to make ends meet. This is the base, the foundation that all the other options are made possible.

Having great sex with the collection phone calls in the background.

What leisure time activities with no gas money.

Raising a family with no school cloths or doctor funds.

Having interesting conversations about how much time before the marshall puts a lock on the door or the eviction notice from the landlord.

Mutual respect is out the window and is replaced with "get off my back"

Same moral beliefs about why is God making this happen.

Other-- "What do we do now and how do we get out of this mess?"

[AnnieBrooke]

I guess on further thought, I wouldn't want a relationship if I had to pick one without the others, so that means to me that one is not most important because it would fail by itself.  It's easier to take one thing off the list than it is to pick only one.  

[AnnieBrooke]

To me, same beliefs about raising kids is sort of under the umbrella of same moral belief system.  I almost picked the money, since you can have all the rest of them but if there is constant stress and strain over money, the relationship is tested all the time.  Hard to pick one since they all interrelate.

[TTinKKerBBell]

I agree E V E R Y one of these is important and I have the good fortune to say that my relationship has all of these.  But, if I were to pick the MOST important  I would pick  #6:  same moral belief system -  since we have that one going on, the others are a given.

[specialmom]

Respect is important and maybe is too fundamental for this list.  Maybe that should be a given that everyone have that for and from their partner.  I think at times I can be disrespectful to my husband though and he to me and we survive.  :>)

[Vance2335]

I voted for respect. Everything else is good to have (well great sex is GREAT to have..ha ha), but without respect can you even look each other in the eyes? Can you believe each other? Can you have a relationship with someone you don't respect?